This is just something i've been
considering over the past five months. I
am, and have been in a solid place in
recovery for some time now. Even though
some challenges have arisen over that time
span, I didn't get engulfed with the
hardships and/or vulnerability, like I
would have done in the past.
I am thinking about decreasing my therapy.
I do not yet feel ready to go every
second week, but what I am thinking about
is maybe going three times a month,
instead of four. I am now at a place
where I have a life of my own, which has
nothing to do with the eating disorder,
and sometimes when asked by friends if i'd
like to go to the cinema or something on
my therapy day, I nearly feel like
cancelling. I know it's good that i've
created a life for myself separate from my
ed, but the idea of going only three times
a month is scary. However, I will be
without the support of my therapist in
november, whilst he is away on holidays.
I've noticed over the past while, that
i've started to become a lot more upfront,
even in the groups I attend. I have come
at peace within myself, that it's ok to
have a difference of opinion, or be upset
with the facilitator of the group.
However, it has become important for me to
verbalise both current and past
grievances. Some things i've said in the
group, and others privately - this usually
depends on the circumstances/situation.
It has become important for me to be
honest to those around me, to the best of
my ability, and I sincerely believe, that
this needs to carry into the groups as
well. For a while I was getting nothing
out of the groups (thought i'd done as
much as I could in the group I go to,
considering the dynamics that exist
there), but over the past few months i've
been trying to act more proactively in
regards to both owning my own values, but
respecting that they do and can differ
from the facilitators. Not sure if i'm
making much sense here.
I guess what i'm looking for is some
guidance on how do you know when it's time
to start decreasing your therapy. Lately
when I go to therapy, it's usually a
discussion of further insights (few and
far between), or changes i'm making.
Whilst making these changes are important,
it is no longer happening through the aid
of therapy - I have become more proactive
in doing things out of the therapy room -
don't feel that therapy is necessary
anymore for me to make these changes.
Any input/advice or suggestions welcome
here.
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BrokenButterfly
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Jun 2005 Posts: 28 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-01-05 08:59am
Ok I know what your talking about on a few
levels.
Firstly the therapy sessions. It sounds
like three times a month is ok for you
because you seem to be able to have a "
normal" life outside therapy. You have
done really well and I can tell from the
way you talk and thats a great thing.
Also remember that things in life happen
and sometimes they are not easy to deal
with and if you can face those things on
your own for just one week without seeing
your therapist then I think it will show
you how far you've come. Remember there
is always the groups and perhaps you can
go to them on the week your not seeing
your therapist so you'll ease yourself out
of that confort, you know. You can always
try it and if you think that maybe 4 times
a month would be better then i'm sure it
will be no problem to go back. I think
its about moving out from your confort
zone and just seeing how you feel. You'll
probably find that when you go three times
a month you will have much more to talk
about because you will be facing more
challenges and experiencing life both its
good and its bad. I think you should go
with your intuition and you can always
have four sessions a month if it doesn't
work out. You will get there.
Secondly the groups, I do go them and I
understand completely what you are saying
but remember that its ok not to agree with
everything being said because everyone is
different and thats what great about the
groups because everyone is so different
and they see things in different ways,
enabling other people to see different
ways of thinking and viewing something
within their life.
I know that everyone is really important
in that group because although you may not
agree with what certain people say at
least you have realised that you have
different values and you don't agree and
thats a really good thing. Its important
to realise that you may not agree with
everything people say but it doesn't make
you any less of a person, it just makes
you a stronger person who knows what they
believe in and stands up for those
beliefs.
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irishamethyst
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jul 2005 Posts: 75 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-02-05 03:47am
Thanks for your reply, and giving me the
motivation I need here. I am going to
ask my counsellor when I see him next.
Even if I don't do anything yet, at least,
he will know that it's been something that
i've been pondering lately. Also, I do
need to get his opinion on the matter -
he's the expert afterall :p !
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irishamethyst
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jul 2005 Posts: 75 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-04-05 09:58am
I am off to therapy now. Am going to ask
my counsellor about the possibility of
cutting down. Think I will open up by
asking him what things he thinks I still
need to work on, and take it from there.
Wish me luck :?
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BrokenButterfly
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Jun 2005 Posts: 28 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-05-05 03:59am
Good luck! And take his advice but I
think that he will trust your opionion.
You sound like you are at a very good
stage of recovery and have learnt to trust
yourself again and if not this can be the
first thing you begin to trust yourself on
again.
Remember you can always have 4 sessions a
week if you don't like the 3.
Let us know how you get on.
Take care!
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irishamethyst
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jul 2005 Posts: 75 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-05-05 04:03am
I broached the subject of possibly cutting
down my sessions last night, and my
counsellor thinks it's brillaint. I kind
of chickened out though, from following
through on it. I have realised that I
need to talk more about it first, before
it actually happens. Even thinking about
the possibility of cutting down, has
brought up so many fears, and feelings
similar to that, when my previous
therapist left. Even though I know i'm
in a different place, and a lot stronger -
I know I need this time to process it, and
find the courage to follow through on
it.
I can't believe that it might actually be
happening though :o
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BrokenButterfly
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Jun 2005 Posts: 28 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-05-05 04:09am
See now you can work on those fears, fears
which might not have been brought up if
you had not suggested cutting down the
sessions. So there is something good that
will come out of this, you realise that
there is still more to work on and by
overcoming and working on the fears which
are preventing you from cutting down on
the sessions, it will help you to get to
know yourself even better and be grateful
to yourself that instead of putting you
through things you are not yet ready for,
you are brave and strong enough to work
through your fears in order to overcome
them and I can tell you that no everyone
is as strong as that.
So when all is said and done even by
having the thoughts of cutting down your
sessions you have futhered yourself along
in recovery.
