My Time With the Dad of Second Child Posted: 09-03-05 16:23pm
When I met ryan I was 18.I already had a
1year old daughter and seemed to be ok
with that fact. But soon into the
relationship I found I was pregnant. He
told me to have an abortion but I said I
would never ever have 1. I said I wanted
siblings for my daughter. I realised that
when I thought he was happy with me being
a mum before he just acted like he was
happy because he knew he had to tolerate
it. He started drinking alot. He was
only 18 like me. He came in at 3am one
morning my daughter was asleep I was still
up he started being abusive because of the
drink but he ended up pushing my down the
stairs. I thought I had lost the baby.
He took me to hospital and got his mum to
come and look after my daughter.He told
everyone I had fell. Iwas in hospital for
3weeks with broken ribs but I was mainly
in so the baby could be monitored. That
was 3weeks of my other childs life I
missed out on. Things were ok after that
I blamed it on the drink. When I had the
baby he started being really abusive. He
was never at home. He was working then
out with his mates. One night he raped
me. I knew he had crossed the line and I
had to get out before he hurt my kids or
seriously hurt me.I left with the kids the
next day without saying bye. He went to
prison for the rape and raping another ex
girlfriend. I blamed myself for the rape
at first and got very depressed but I had
to pull myself together for my 2
daughters.
He got out of prison and took me to court
claiming I was an unfit mum. He obviously
lost and said he didnt want nothing to do
with me or his daughter then. He's back
in prison now. I have another kid but
even though I am a single mum again i'm
happy. I may of got raped and beat up but
I ended up better off. It made me a
stronger person and made me put my kids
first before absolutely anything.
|
KellyR
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Aug 2005 Posts: 90
Posted: 09-03-05 20:31pm
Well, i'm sorry you had to go through
this...And that he can't be the dad you
children need...But you are definetly
better without him. He got what he
deserved going to prison.
You sound like a very strong woman and a
great mom. Your children need you the
most and you have to stay this way for
their sake. Leave behind what happened
with this guy and move forward. Live your
life and make your children happy and the
rest will come by itself. I'm sure one
day you'll find a nice guy to love you and
the little ones and be to them the father
they need....Until then, keep your head
up, and don't ever allow anyone to treat
you like this guy did. Never.
Be strong.
Good luck!
|
sillypoint
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Aug 2005 Posts: 11 Location: UK
Posted: 09-04-05 07:56am
Hi,
i live about 10 miles from you sam, it
sounds to me like you've been through a
lot, reading your other posts too. I
think you are too trusting! It seems like
the men you have been with didn't deserve
you and certainly didn't treat you right.
But you have done well to have the
strength to get rid of them, a lot of
women stay in abusive relationships
because they are afraid.
Being a guy, I get to see how my mates
treat women, and i've got to say the way
they all are just makes me proud to be
different. I feel sorry for women tho
because there is no way you can tell the
decent blokes from the bad ones, all my
mates know exactly how to talk to a girl.
Meaning it is another thing entirely. I
hope you have more luck with the next
bloke u find, if you ever need to chat
i'll pop down hanley n say ello.. Lol
Thanks to you both! Ye I no I have been
to trusting and everything but I am a
completely different person now. It's
taught me alot and now I know that my main
priority is my kids. I have been through
alot but I am a strong person now and I
happy being a single mum to my 3 kids.
They are what I live for and without them
I don't think I would of had the strength
to carry on
so thanks again to both of u and
sillypoint where do u liv then? Stafford?
Newcastle? Sumwhere lyk that?
Xsamx
|
sillypoint
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Aug 2005 Posts: 11 Location: UK
Posted: 09-04-05 18:57pm
Live near crewe, bout 15 mins from hanley,
which is where I go bout 3 nights a week
(rock cafe, walkabout, liquid)
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