How Can I Get Her to Want Me More Often?

That is how I feel about my husband he treats me like a queen. But I am on our first child and will have her any day I hope. Well let me tell you what we do that helps us stay strong with our busy lifes we learned this from our parents.

If you can have date night once a week and take her where ever suits the mood. This will sound crazy but even mcdonalds can be romantic if you make it. Just get a baby sitter if needed and make her go even better surprise her.Then when you come home make sure that its just you to find something to distract her and maybe have candles lit in the bedroom or where ever you want to do it. Maybe even try rose petals spread over the floor. Or go somewhere for the weekend just the two of you and try the same stuff there. Trust me women love this. My husband even likes it when I surprise him with things like that. Yea I know we are sorta different since we are on our first child.

And as far as age goes well that shouldnt matter you are as young as you feel. Both of our parents have such a beautiful relashnship still.

First of all you must understand that levels of sexual desire are different for each person, and also differ within the same person day to day. For example, I am extremely horny one day and can't get enough, then the next day I don't even feel like being touched. This is perfectly normal.

Angel is right. Maybe it would help to set the mood. I do not know how a day is in your household. Once, or twice, a week give your woman the day off from duty. This means the kids, the house cleaning, cooking. The whole nine yards. My sex drive is usually higher than my other half's, but on days when there is tons to be done I often feel too tired to even care about sex.

Then on that day off find a babysitter. Hopefully for overnight. Take her out to a nice dinner. Maybe while you are out at dinner you can get one of her friends, or one of your friends, to secretly set the mood at home for your return. Imagine what it would be like for her t come home to such things that weren't even there when you left! They can set up flowers, rose petals trailed on the floor leading up to and on the bed. A nice hot candlelit bubble bath using one of her favorite scents (lavender or vanilla works well). You could even have the rose petals in and around the bathtub with the bottle of wine and a glass next to the tub as well. Have a warmed fluffly towel and her favorite robe cleaned and waiting for when she gets out. Take the time to bathe her, every inch. Make sure to tell he how much you appreciate her being in your life, and how beautiful she is to you. Tell her how much you love her still.

When finished dry her off and head to the bed (or wherever). You can purchase some massage lotions that are not sticky and smell good. Make sure they are not the sticky kind. Not good after a nice bath. Give her a nice full body massage. Every single inch from head to toe. Let this lead on to the sex.


It is all too often that men forget to tell their women how much they are appreciated for all they do. When a woman starts to feel unappreciated that can have a major impact on her sex drive.

I couldnt have said it better myself.

Another good thing to do is little tokens of appreciation once, or twice, a week. A card, a flower, a little note left for her to find, an e-mail, a compliment, if she works you can show up at her work with a picnic lunch to have lunch together, pull her outside under a full moon to slow dance. Little things like that. I am not saying you have to do this every single day. Just maybe once a week to help bring that spark of romance back into your lives. Actually, maybe once every couple of weeks even. If you do it too often it may not be as meaningful. As long as it suprises her and she doesn't suspect/expect it. Make her feel like a giddy teenager again, or like when you first started dating.

My fiance' would shoot me if he knew I was sharing this but I will share it anyway to help. I was going through a very rough time. I just lost my job. That night he took the dog out. When he came back inside he took me by the hand and asked me to come outside with him. Of course, I asked why/what. After a little opposition I went. He led me to the backyard. He stood behind me, holding me in his arms with his chin resting on my shoulder, cheek to cheek. He said, "look at that. Isn't it beautiful?" I didn't understand so asked him what. He then told me the way the moonlight looked on the tree branches.


I never even stopped to really study the effect of moonlight on tree branches. So, not only did I learn to appreciate another facet of nature, but I also felt tons better like everything would be alright. It was just one of those "little things" that meant the world to me. And hey, it was free! In my mind that one moment in time with him will never be able to be replaced, never forgotten.


A few other times I have come home to a candlelit house and flowers, cards, dinner cooked, house cleaned, a massage. More little things that count, and let me know that I am appreciated in his life. These are just examples of my own personal experiences with those precious "little things." you know your wife best, so probably know best how to bring that spark back.

I tell her how much I appreciate her and tell her I love her all the time. I don't think I have given her a bath in about ten years, I have trouble getting past certain areas ;) but am I going to have to do this kind of thing all the time? I want to have a regular sex life. She says she's always too tired or it's too late at night. In the mornings is when we usually have sex, but it seems to always be rushed. I'm not trying to sound like i'm the most romantic guy in the world, I like to get mine as much as the next guy. I do like to give her real pleasure though. Thanks for all your tips, i'll keep trying.

That is just it, though. Real pleasure for a woman takes real time. No 15 minute wham bam thank you mam sessions. Heck, it usually takes a woman 15 minutes to even get started!

There is certainly nothing wrong with an occasional quickie, but this seldom does a whole lot for most women. There are many women who cannot even acheive orgasm vaginally. They need clitoral stimulation as well.

I am sure after 14 years you know how to please your woman. In my own 13 year relationship that isone thing we did well. Sex. The longer you are with someone the better you know their bodies. I will say this, though. After the 11 year mark sex did seem to be becoming more of a chore than pleasurable. If it took me longer to reach climax he would become frustrated, etc.

Does your sex life seem more like a chore now than pleasure? Maybe this is how your wife feels about it? Have you talked to her about why she won't have sex more often?

From my own experiences, maybe she truly is too tired? I feel like that many many nights. If I had more help in keeping up with the household chores it would be much easier, and I would feel like sex more often. As a matter of fact it has been proven that men who help with the housework get laid more. This means help in everything. Cooking, cleaning, laundry kids. Everything.

You say that you tell her allthe time how much you love her and appreciate her. That is wonderful, but do you show her? Telling is one thing, showing is another. It does not have to be all the time. The things I decsribed above maybe once every 2 - 3 months. It just sounds to me like your wife has lost the spark in the relationship.