Can This Marriage Ba Saved Posted: 12-01-03 16:16pm
Ive been married for 11 yrs,the beging was
better then great,but then the drinking
started and never stoped,except for when I
leave or threaten to leave.I think im
getting to the point were I cant take it
no more I seem to always say this ,but its
getting to the point were the verible
abuse is getting so bad were I sometimes
think why do I even live any more.Im a big
women and I always feel if I leave ill be
by myself forever but then I think I am
anyway.But I just cant get up the nerve to
leave for good and I dont understand why
cause hes killing me slowely.We live like
room mates were never together we do
nothing I mean nothing together all he
wants do do is drink,and I sure dont want
to be with a drunk in bed so we dont even
sleep together.Were not talking right know
so im really thinking about leaving one
day when hes at work but I cant seem to
get up the nerve help,one more thing I
have never been on my own I went from home
tp married right out of school.I need your
opinion please ,family always tells you tp
leave but I really have nowhere to go
cause we all live beside eachother.Plus
the holidays are coming and my annisvery
is christmas eve but thats really the
least of my worries.
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minerwater
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Oct 2003 Posts: 153 Location: Canada
Posted: 12-01-03 17:20pm
I know very well what it's like to have
someone in my life an alcoholic. Well, my
whole family basically. Its not easy...I
know what you go through every night.
You have to set priorities and you are the
1st.
You have two choices. You leave, or work
it out. Rembember your husband has a
deisease and when someone is ill, they
need to be cured. The problem with
alcoholism is that it's usually cured by
the choice of the one who is ill. And
that can be very, very tough. You have to
play tough love. You either leave him in
his missery and find yourself a man who
wants to have a beautiful future with you
or you help him.
My honest suggestion would be to move out
and tell him you will move back in with
him once he's done treatment for his
problem. And full recovery. Tell him you
will be there for him and support him all
the way but this is not a choice of life
style for you, nor should you have to put
up with anyone elses choice. Remember you
choose your destiny...And how you want to
live your life. If he loves you deep,
he'll do it for you. It may take time and
patience but men realise what they are
missing.
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minerwater
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Oct 2003 Posts: 153 Location: Canada
Posted: 12-29-03 08:39am
Now that was a smart comment!
Why don't you shut the f*ck up.
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CarolAnn
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Jan 2004 Posts: 2 Location: Mass
Drinking Posted: 01-23-04 21:46pm
To star00, may I suggest you go to this
site, they will help, ask a question today
and tommorrow you will have a nswer. When
the screen opens go directly to message
boards the very first one. Just remeber
this is his problem not yours. Www.Rhiannon3.Net
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BeckyA
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Apr 2004 Posts: 3 Location: kansas
Drinking Posted: 04-14-04 23:11pm
I sympathize with u cause of my personal
struggle with my husband he was addicted
to something but it was alcohol and I got
tired of being hurt over and over and
finally after the last physical thing I
went and got a restraining order and
kicked his as# out it felt good once he
was gone damn it felt like freedom I was
nervous as hell I at the time my kids were
very young totally depended on my husband
since I was 17 and here I am a so called
grown up with kids that aren't even in
school yet but u know what honey I made it
just fine continued school worked when I
could even got assistance but it was worth
it knowing I was going to school to become
a part of society that gets taxed out the
as# lol to pay back that help. The point
is u will make it u are #1 u have to be
cause if u aren't strong enough to respect
yourself or to love yourself no one else
will either. As far as being a big girl I
am a member of that club also and let me
tell u honey if u think for one second I
have not had as many respectful sexy male
relationship prospects as any skinny woman
u must be out your mind it is all about
confidence I know I am a big woman I live
it everyday u walk in any public place
with your head down and are insecure
people men and women alike will sense it
but if u walk in big or small with your
head held high and confident things fall
into place I promise u take care hope u
are still checking this
