I'm So Ashamed of How I Look Posted: 10-17-05 05:58am
Hi,
i am a recovering anorexic, I have been in
therapy for about 4 months and am starting
to eat healthily again.
The problem is I have put on sooo much
weight, it is disgusting. I don't eat
loads, in fact I probably still don't eat
as much as I should, but I have really
really piled on weight.
I feel so horrible and ashamed of myself.
I still exercise quite a lot- I haven't
yet overcome that part of it, but it seems
no matter how hard I work, I cannot get my
body into a decent shape. I'm all out of
proportion and bloated and its making me
so depressed. I mean, I can't even fit
into clothes that I used to wear before I
had this terrible disease.
I have told my parents and therapist how I
feel and they keep telling me that its all
in my head, but I know its not.
I want to be totally free of this, but how
can I when I stand at my wardrobe and cry
every morning cause I can't find anything
to fit.
I feel like people look at me and think
'how did she let herself go'. I eat so
good, loads of fruit and veg and drink
loads of water and exercise well, why do I
put on weight instead of maintaing it and
toning my muscles up?
Please help someone, I can't go on feeling
like this anymore, I sometimes wish I
would die and put myself out of this
misery.
|
inezrina
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Oct 2005 Posts: 174
Posted: 10-17-05 22:35pm
I understand how you feel it is an awful
feeling when you know you are just getting
bigger no matter what anyone says. The
truth is that this will be hard for awhile
because since you are now eating more your
body is holding on to it (in case you
don't eat again) your body is trying to
save itself hence the weight gain in
strange proportions the good news is that
if you cdontinue eating regularly and
exercise like you already do your body
will even out. Also bloating of course
makes it all worse but that too is because
your body is not used to eating regularly.
Hang in there if you can
inezrina
