Joined: 19 Sep 2005 Posts: 288 Location: Amherst VA
Should I Be Mad?? Posted: 10-25-05 15:52pm
My husband is the lead guitar player of a
very popular local band and they are
schuled for shows most all weekends.
Well, we were planning to take a family
trip with my parents to my grandparents
house to let them see our 3 month old son
for the first time. My husband has a show
schelduled for that weekend and when I
brought it up to him today, he got all mad
and said that he can't just cancel the
show. I feel like he is putting his band
before his family. My grandparents are
very old and i'm not sure how much longer
they will be around so i'd really like for
them to met their great grandson and my
husband. I'm so mad at him and i'm not
sure if I really have the right to be or
not!! What do you guys think...I'm I
pissed for a stupid reason? Should I just
drop it and let him play in the show??
Aaahhhhh!! So frustrating!!
Thanks,
teresa
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junfanJKD
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2005 Posts: 25 Location: New Jersey
Posted: 10-25-05 15:57pm
Well im just 16 but I don't think anything
you might say will make him cancel the
show I mean he is going to say I can't
cancel the show I will only play in this
place once only but I can go visit you
granparents anytime
just my opinion
i like playn guitar!!!
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wife2jason_mom2ryley
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Sep 2005 Posts: 288 Location: Amherst VA
Posted: 10-25-05 16:09pm
Yeah, he is in love with the guitar!! I
used to think it was sexy but now it's
just kinda old!! Anyways, i'm only
19...So it's not like you are that much
younger then me. Are you kidding,
everytime they play out they get invited
back to play again many times because they
bring in big crowds. This is the 2nd time
he has played this place. He doesn't like
to fight with me...So no matter what I say
to him, he is just going to avoid the
subject. Oh, what kind of guitar do you
play?? What kind of music are you
into??
Thanks,
teresa
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Lilypad
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Oct 2005 Posts: 1043 Location: Ohio, USA
Posted: 10-28-05 08:45am
That is his passion and im sure you knew
he was all about it when you married him.
I think you should work around his band
shows...
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wife2jason_mom2ryley
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Sep 2005 Posts: 288 Location: Amherst VA
Posted: 10-31-05 15:04pm
Yes, I did know that this was (is) his
passion. But, family is number one no
matter what...Even before his guitar and
his band. Do you not agree??
Teresa
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Lilypad
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Oct 2005 Posts: 1043 Location: Ohio, USA
Posted: 11-02-05 01:01am
Yes I agree with you that family should
come first. And I really do see your
piont , also. Maybe you two could come
to a comprimise? Like can you reschedule
the family visit to maybe a month from now
or 2 ? Or make some agreement that he
gives one weekend a month to "family time"
or something.
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wife2jason_mom2ryley
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Sep 2005 Posts: 288 Location: Amherst VA
Posted: 11-02-05 16:57pm
The reason we are going that weekend is
because it is over thanksgiving. He will
not be able to spend thanksgiving with us.
The family thing is a good idea..Thanks.
I'm aready learning...The fourth of july
weekend we are planning to go to my
parent's in nc and i'v already told him
not to book any shows. I let him no way
in advance this time!! Lol!! Everything
is going ot work out though. We are going
to drive up on thanksgiving day and then
he is going to leave the next day to go to
his show and then my mom is just going to
bring my son and I home that sunday.
He'll just have to miss visting with my
granparents...Disapointing, put i'll get
over it.
Thanks for the advice,
teresa
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Sammy001
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jun 2005 Posts: 711 Location: ,
Posted: 11-02-05 17:19pm
I agree with you teresa. My husband is
also in a band, and they had a huge show
plan for 2 weeks after my due date back
last april....
Guess what... I went two weeks over!!,
and was in labour the day of the
show.....Anyways to make a long story
short three hours before they were
scheduled to go on stage he backed out.
I was only 3 cm dilated at that time, and
the doc said it would be hours...
I told him to go....Told him I would be
fine...But he refused and they
cancelled... The rest of the band was
super pissed...And they broke up shortly
after that. His brother is also in the
band and we didn't get along from day one,
and he actually had the nerve to say that
I did it on purpose so he couldn't play.
Like I put myself in labour on purpose, 2
weeks after my due date..Holy medical
question!!!!
The way he stood by my, even when I told
him to go, and how he refused, and stood
up for me, when the band was fuming
pissed. I was more important, and
seeing the birth of his first child meant
alot more to him than going to some smoky
tavern. ( I would hope so! )
and the funny thing was....I delivered 20
minutes later ..From the time I told him I
was fine, and to go.
He would have missed everything.
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Lilypad
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Oct 2005 Posts: 1043 Location: Ohio, USA
Posted: 11-03-05 08:48am
Aaahh I see now why it was such a big
deal..Didnt realize it was over
thanksgiving...Thats a horse of a
different color.
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pixma
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Aug 2005 Posts: 1015 Location: NSW Australia
Bloody Oath I'd Be Pissed!!!!! Posted: 11-12-05 07:58am
Bloody oath i'd be pissed!!!!!
By all means if he has a passion then
support him anyway possible!!
But its when it interferes with family
that friction starts!! His family should
be his number one priority!!!
Good luck! :-)
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flickit
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 May 2006 Posts: 2
Posted: 05-05-06 06:47am
"are you kidding, everytime they play out
they get invited back to play again many
times because they bring in big crowds"
that's a very important point!!..
I'm a professonal drummer and under stand
where you're comming from... But, you
can't just cancel a gig. That's very bad
buisness and can hurt the bands chances of
ever playing there again.
You guys need to plan ahead. My wife
understands when i'm booked there's no
getting out of it unless I have a fill in
player.
Tell your man good luck and keep rockin!
