Joined: 15 Nov 2005 Posts: 4 Location: north carolina
New Here Posted: 11-15-05 17:49pm
Hi all! I'm new here. I started looking
around on the web because my wife is/seems
to be bipolar. The trouble is, she has
thus far refused to seek any help. Her
brother is diagnosed as bipolar, so the
family link is there. Here are some
symptoms...She feels tired, has trouble
waking up, but then is wide awake and
can't sleep most nights when i'm ready for
bed. She is depressed and feels that
nothing or no one can help her feel
better. She will not talk to me in detail
about her troubles...She simply tells me
she is "psycho" and thinks that I should
leave her because she doesn't want to put
me through this. She sometimes
(frequently...Maybe two or three nights a
week) doesn't come home. She goes to her
friend's house and ends up staying there.
She claims the reason for this is that she
doesn't want to trouble me with her
problems, but this only makes me a
wreck...Worrying about her, thinking she
might be cheating on me, etc...
Anyway, does anyone have any suggestions
of how I can get her to seek help without
doing so forcibly??? Her brother is
bipolar and she and her sister-in-law had
to have him involuntarily commited in
order for him to get help. It was not a
pretty scene, what with the cops and the
tazer! I would like to avoid putting her
through something like that, but above all
I want her to get help, whatever it takes.
Any advice would be very much
appreciated.
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lonelyteardrop
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Nov 2005 Posts: 5 Location: Sacramento Ca
Posted: 11-16-05 12:16pm
Hi I have just been diagnosed with bipolar
ive suffered from the same symtoms for
many yrs with what you described your
wifes symptoms..Unfortunatly I lost
everything I worked many yrs for from my
depression endless nights of no sleep from
worry, I started drinking thinking that
would help me and that only lead to more
problems..I had to be commited also for 17
days I am now taking medications and am
feeling much better its a day to day
process for people who suffer from this
mental disorder.I lost a very good husband
20 yrs ago because of my behaivor..I know
its hard on you try to suggest to your
wife how much better she will feel by
getting help...
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drumist69
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Nov 2005 Posts: 4 Location: north carolina
Posted: 11-16-05 18:19pm
I talked to my sister in law (my wife's
brother's wife) tonight, since she went
through this with my wife's brother.
She's going to talk to the rest of the
family and see if they can come up with a
plan to get my wife some help. She seems
to feel that it will be better if my wife
hears this from more people than just me.
We'll see how things go this evening.
Thanks for your story!
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BPjoe23
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Oct 2005 Posts: 111 Location: dfw tx
Posted: 11-16-05 18:52pm
Don't call the cops call the paramedices.
Cops are known to use force and don't
know much about bipolar disorder, as to
where paramedices know about it. If I was
you I see her down and tell her you are
worried and that you are her husband and
want to help her. Say geting help for a
problem is showing that person is strong,
not weak - a strong person omits they have
a problem. I think the plan you
described would work too.
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drumist69
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Nov 2005 Posts: 4 Location: north carolina
Posted: 11-16-05 19:53pm
No cops, no! The first step is seeing if,
as a family, we can convince her to go.
We'll see how it goes! Thanks!
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drumist69
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Nov 2005 Posts: 4 Location: north carolina
Posted: 11-17-05 07:41am
Well my wife came home from work last
night and I tried talking to her more.
This did not go well. It ended with her
saying that she wanted to be alone and if
I didn't leave, she would. I went out to
the car and sat for a few minutes, but
couldn't just go like that. So I went ack
in to try talking again. I kept trying to
impress upon her that I loved her and
wanted her to be happy. Still nothing
postitive, she still wanted me to leave.
So I went to her brothers house, and
talked to them. His wife went down to
talk to my wife. When she got to the
house, my wife was crying in the bathroom.
After talking a bit, she agreed to talk
to her brother's counselor asap. Then she
got agitated with the situation and left.
I came home about midnight, since she
wasn't here. She hasn't been home yet. I
suppose I will call, or have someone call
her at work today, since we have some
issues to deal with such as the children.
This is a second marriage for us both, and
we both have kids from the previous
marriage. Along with her family, we
decided that it would be best for the kids
if I were to keep them until she levels
out. Of course, she didn't come home, so
she doesn't know anything about this yet.
Thats why I or someone will call her at
work, to discuss this aspect. Things are
not going well...I'm trying to be strong
but its damn hard! Peace!
