Hi, i'm new to this but need to talk...I
am 28 and a mother of two. I'm just
coming out of a bad marriage where I had
little worth and felt like I was just
along for the ride. I got married young
(17) and basically grew up with my soon to
be ex. My life revolved around him and
his selfish, irresponsible behavior... He
made most of the decisions and I followed
along like a little puppy. My self esteem
was zero and I felt like I could do no
right on my own.
I put up with alot in that marriage ... I
stayed invisible way too long and realized
that things were never going to change.
Instead of trying to convince myself again
that it all was my fault and falling
deeper into depression, I decided to get
out and start a new life.
Well, I got out but I feel stuck. I have
a hard time making decisions on my
own...My self esteem level is still very
low...I tend to beat myself up over the
decisions i've made in the past...And I
don't know what to do with myself. I
need to be stronger for my children but I
don't know how. Most of the time I just
feel like I am wasting my life away...
Just watching it go by day by day with
nothing to show for it. My family is
happy that I left my husband and they are
rooting for me...But i've moved to a new
state and I don't have any friends nearby
which leaves me feeling lonely...But most
of all I feel stripped and empty...Like
what little I had of myself was taken away
by my ex and there is nothing left of me.
H e l p....
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LISAMARIE
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Oct 2003 Posts: 19 Location: Utah
Strong Women Posted: 12-17-03 16:12pm
Gomez,
you are a strong person! Leaving a
situation like that takes a strong person
and a smart one. I know you don't feel
like you can make your own decisions, and
that your self-esteem is low but just the
path you took to another state to begin
your own like proves other wise. Remember
you are a women and women are strong!!
When you get to feeling down and maybe
indecisive just think I am women hear me
roar!!!!
Love,
lisa marie
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redrose
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Nov 2003 Posts: 47
Posted: 12-28-03 17:26pm
Deleted
Last edited by redrose on 01-02-04 12:40pm; edited 1 time in total
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redrose
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Nov 2003 Posts: 47
Posted: 12-28-03 17:34pm
Deleted
Last edited by redrose on 01-02-04 12:41pm; edited 1 time in total
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Zarone
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Dec 2003 Posts: 1 Location: Canada
Stripped Bare Posted: 12-29-03 11:56am
I am too, new to this forum... ( not that
it matters) it is really too bad pat would
not understand the phrase "if you can't
find something nice to say, say nothing"
even teenagers suffer from depression and
should be taken seriously... All I can
say is that allot of us can relate to this
topic and all I can say is that, you have
already made bold steps by admitting there
is a problem and taking steps to correct
it... These are the hardest steps... You
will find with time that this will heal
and with strong support (family and
friends) the rough times are easier to
take. Even the church was a help to me
because the load was spread among us.
Find what you need to survive, whether
that be professional advice, a group, or a
friend, but don't give up... You have
made some great steps already.
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Nansmom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Dec 2003 Posts: 11 Location: USA
Posted: 12-31-03 05:40am
Guess i've missed a few posts that have
been cut, looks like those little grimlins
are at it again... Sigh...
Gomez, you are quite welcome here, and I
hope whatever was in those remarks didn't
scare you away. Of course everything is
going to feel strange and new, and you
have no idea what the future holds. But,
I agree with the others, you've taken some
great big steps in getting yourself a
better life. It's scarey, yes, but the
more decisions you make, the more
confidence you will gain in being able to
manage your affairs. See, you moved.
On your own. And you survived! And,
it's actually a good thing. It might
take a while for you to realize that, and
for it all to sink in. You are very
young, you have lots of time to build for
a future. You can make a new start.
You've taken the first steps to make that
happen, now, what's your next step? Do
you have a job? If not, do you want to
get a job? Just take one thing/one day
at a time. Don't stress out about what's
not being done, but keep a list of all you
have done for yourself and your children.
And, take a few minutes each day for you.
Take a bubble bath, watch a favorite
show, read a good book, something that
makes you feel good. And enjoy it!
Often, we're made to feel guilty for doing
something we enjoy. But, it is really
sooooo needed, for us to recharge our
batteries.
Keep us posted on how things go, I wish
the very best for you.
Congratulations on your new start
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Guest
Guest
Thanks: 4
Thanked:0
? Posted: 01-22-04 10:53am
It takes alot of courage to leave what you
did.
I hope you are on the road to building
back up what was knocked down.
That takes a little bit of time to realize
you can make your
own decisions and you can be
strong!!!!!!!!!
I know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And don't worry about what has happened
just learn from it!!!
Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
