Can't Keep It Up

How old are you?
How much do you masturbate?

As I said, i'm just short of twenty-one. I masterbate five to seven times a week, on average.

Sorry about that...

Anyways, considering your age, it's probably a combination of a few things. First off, nerves might be playing a role.

Are you on any medication or under a lot of stress? These could also have an effect.

I would just say that the sensation/stimulation might be a little different than you're use to, to mentally you're it's not pleasuring to you. I would say, just concentrate on what's going on to help keep your mind in an arroused mental state. It might sound like bs, but it's really not.

I think it's your nerves.

Believe it or not, you have to be really comfortable with someone the first time you have sex with them, or things like this happen.

Maybe you worry to much & just don't let it happen.

It probably is my nerves. I'm not on any medication, though i'm usually under a bit of stress. I'm debating whether this warrents a visit to the doctor. He may prescribe viagra or something similar, but if it works I don't want to become dependent on it (plus, planning an hour ahead of time when you're going to have sex can be difficult, givin my circumstances). Does anyone know of any mental techniques that help keep you in the mood? Also, does this sort of thing usually get better the more sexual experience one builds up, or will it keep coming back until I deal with the root problem (whatever that is)?

I really appriciate everyone's responses. It helps just to know that i'm not alone.

With time, as you become less nervous, it should be atleast somewhat easier on you. You can practice during masturbation. Just try and concentrate on your stimulation, and do whatever it takes to keep yourself arroused.

Hi, well I had/sometimes actually still have the same prob
started in my first real attempt to pentrate one sexy lady
tried 3 times that night to no avail - felt like a vegetable!

Time passed, another attempt came, I was now 20 - happened again
but to be honest, she wasnt all that pretty this time but I knew that wasnt really the problem

time passed, another attempt came - now 21, same thing kept happening till one night when I opened up to her and told her I was really a virgo and all the girls id told her id laid were all in someone elses imagination! Not even mine!!

So, now she was pretty supportive and soon I finally stuck my piece inside a girl!

See I think wat caused it for me was all the thoughts in my head: 'dam she thinks im a player and ive banged plenty women so she expecting some real lovin' or 'she is probably thinking she is lucky to even have me in her bed and wants a night to remember'

banish those thought because they put pressure on u

i find that I cant perform when somethings on my mind - something as little as 'wat if my phone vibrates and its my dad'

take precautaions to prevent such situations occuring - leave ur phone on silent or downstairs - or turn it off

'oh man, I have to reach for a condom, my piece will be soft by the time ive fiddled around' - keep at least one in ur back pocket or somewhere easy to reach - I find it more turning on when she doesnt even know when I put it on - or go to her place with one on already!

The thing is I am now with a girl I love - I didnt always love her and used to give her the slex of her life

but now im starting to fall in love and I actually wanna please her ---pressure! So I find that talking about sex before actually doing it helps - its not the typical head upstairs, get on bed, kiss, dirty kiss, unbutton her pants, finger, take off rest of her clothes and urs, then penetrate - if I do that, can almost guarantee it wont work

so I talk with her bout slex - which actually turns her on then sometimes, my fingers just wander into her pants and start playing away, this doesnt even mean we gonna do it, just playing around. Then while im doing this, my pants start dropping and im so turned on its hard to soften up

then condom (or not) and penetrate depending on how turned on she/ I am

thats if u wanna have slex - sometimes women actually prefer just the kissin and cuddlng and talking

but us men always think it has to end with penetration and us 'making her cum'

it doesnt - depends on her/your mood

finally, I was brought up in a christian home and shouldnt actually be slexing before marriage - im working on that one

so that could be part of the things makin me soften up - guilt?

Neway, whether or not u agree with sex after marriage, the trick is to be relaxed. How? Dont think you can only please her with penetration. Try other stuff. Cream her body with any cream she has. Women love this. Cream her from head to toe whilst naked. U will even find it may turn u on and it saves u having to undress her and allow ur piece to soften. Whilst creaming her, u can eliminate dick softening tasks like put on a condom - see while creaming her, shes too busy enjoying alternative pleasure to notice wat else ur doing

neway ive said enough

i just recently had the same problem you're describing. literally everything you said stads true for me, except im not a virgin and never had this problem before. all of a sudden, with this new girl, i ant get it up. now, i did try a few times under the influence of ecstasy and (if anybody knows about that stuff) its pretty much impossible. but then, i was completely sober, and it happened again. the girl has noo problem getting me hard, but then whe the clothes come off, i cant seem to get it up. what the hell is going on?