Joined: 20 Dec 2005 Posts: 7 Location: ellsworth me
I Dont Think My Man Like My Big Belly Posted: 12-20-05 10:56am
I dont think im sexy to him any more cause
he never want to have sex and he won't
even put his hand on my belly to fill the
baby move im 29 week and I fill like im
going to pop im so big im doc... Says he
is going to be a big baby is allready 6
pounds and not even close to ready to come
out im so big and so ugle that my old man
dosnt even want me the way he us to :(
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stephanie24
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Oct 2005 Posts: 53 Location: bc, canaduh
Big Belly Posted: 12-21-05 01:27am
I am 35 weeks and large as well. My baby
is bigger than "normal" and my doc says
i'm fine. My bf thinks of me as a "mom"
figure and doesn't want to have sex
anymore either. Nothing we can do about
this, hon. Men are men. Hopefully he
will read some books along with you or
watch tv programs to understand what's
going on in there and understand what your
body is going through. You aren't alone
in this, though sometimes it may feel this
way. I am learning to love and care for
my body as it is and I am replacing sex
with intimacy in our relationship. It
seems to help. Remember: this is not a
permanent body you are left with. The
belly will go away and your thighs will
return to normal. Think: beautiful!
Good luck with your pregnancy
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buttercup_501
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2005 Posts: 63 Location: Oregon
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 02-10-06 16:02pm
My husband is having a hard time with sex
because he knows that his little girl is
there in my belly. He says it just doesnt
feel right. Hes funny that way but we
have replaced sex with intamacy as well.
I know it makes me feel better just to
have him cuddled up around me!!
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Eyes Wide Shut
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 7892 Location: *UPTOWN*NEW ORLEANS*, La
Posted: 02-10-06 18:20pm
I don't know how much I believe that at 29
weeks a baby can be 6 lbs...I am 29 weeks
as well and mine is only 3..And that's
large...
If your baby is already 6 lbs...He/she
will be a good 20lbs at birth....Imma have
to read up on this....
Sarah
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 02-10-06 20:02pm
Hi there! Do not blame yourself! A lot
of guys, get this way because they are
afraid they will hurt you or the baby
sexually, they are afraid to squeeze or
hug you, don't worry after all it takes
two and like they say, pregnant women are
beautiful and your hormones are bouncing
off of the wall, just sit down, talk to
him, have a good cry and remember
valentine's day is coming up soon have a
romantic candlelight dinner, get together
with friends, go out to dinner, even if it
is fast food, go shopping do whatever you
feel that will make you happy, your
pregnancy will not last forever. Enjoy
your pregnancy and let him know that it is
too bad that he will not enjoy it with
you. Remember, you are not alone, a lot
of men are this way.
Good luck!
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Tamadrummer
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Oct 2004 Posts: 710 Location: Zephyrhills,Fl
Posted: 02-10-06 21:21pm
As a man that just came through all the
changes within the past several months, I
found it very hard, infact impossible to
have sex with my wife durring the last 4
or 5 months of pregnancy.
We spoke about it and she was really put
off but at the same time, she understood.
There is something about me that makes
yeast infections happen to my wife if we
do not clean like crazy after sex. I have
suffered from chronic reocurring
epididmitus for well over 15 years and I
think that is tha cause of her infections.
Durring pregnancy, using the medications
to fix the problem are off limits.
She is very sexually oriented that it
really bothered her a ton but now that the
baby is here, things are slowly getting
back to normal other than the fact that I
am never in bed at the same time she is
because I do the night feeding and putting
to bed of the boy and there are times it
can take a couple of hours to get him
tucked in and fully out.
Don't worry about sex right now, there are
so many things running through the minds
of men getting ready to be daddy's that it
would most likly not be making love but
really having sex to say they did it.
Hope this helps,
brian
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AEinstein
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Dec 2005 Posts: 29
Posted: 02-13-06 17:22pm
I am 34 weeks and my boyfriend just wants
to look at porn. I understand the whole,
"not wanting to hurt the baby" excuse, but
gosh darn it, I feel extremely
unattractive right now, and seeing that
the effort to even be intimate is slim to
none, I find, catching him looking at his
pornography collection to be nothing shy
of offensive. I probably sound like I am
whining, but it really does hurt.
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Eyes Wide Shut
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 7892 Location: *UPTOWN*NEW ORLEANS*, La
Posted: 02-13-06 18:06pm
I don't allow porn in my
relationship..It's cheating in my book...I
never did allow it..
It was very surprising when I told him in
the beginning that I didn't like it...He
said he didn't like it either....Strip
clubs don't come into the picture
either...They are both degrating to women
and if you think he thinking about you
while you're making love...It's probably
the girl in the porn or at the club he's
really thinking about...
Whew girls..I'm glad I don't have that
prob....One of my best friends' man is
like that and it was cool for her at
first...Now he might as well be having sex
with other girls....
Good luck honey!! I know how you feel
about not looking your best right
now...Just let him know exactly how you
feel about the situation and i'm sure
he'll change his actions!!
Sarah..
Ps..Show him an article that says sex is
ok until the last day of your pregnancy!!
Lol..Then he'll have no excuses!!
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Sarah1978
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Sep 2005 Posts: 123 Location: NZ
Posted: 02-16-06 19:42pm
In a moment of brutal honesty (assisted by
a bit of dutch courage!) the other day my
husband confessed that he couldn't stand
the sight of me naked now that im heavily
pregnant. I was a little self concious at
first but got over that quickly and was
pleased he was honest about it and even
though he don't like seeing me naked our
sex life isn't too bad at all (especially
when its dark and the lights are off!
Lol) other than the fact i'm started to
find it uncomfortable now. I wouldn't
worry about it too much he has to sort it
out in his own time its a big change for
him too. Men are strange creatures and
they all react differently :-) just sit
him down and talk it through with him,
make sure you tell him how your feeling
too! - hopefully he has a little more
tact than my husband !! Lol :-)
good luck
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Rhemora
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Mar 2006 Posts: 23 Location: Australia
Posted: 03-07-06 02:27am
Hi I was just wandering through here(had
too many friends pregnant so thought I may
aswell learn something about it)and I
thought that I could put another point of
view on this, on the last friend that was
pregnant she was larger than all the
others had gotten and feeling large and
ugly because her boyfriend wouldnt do that
kind of stuff either, I got him talking
one day when it was just him and myself
and managed to find out that it was more
to the fact of him not wanting to hurt the
child to why he was being so careful even
when he just got near to her belly, I hope
this helps you understand how his side
feels and try not to worry a pregnant
belly doesnt change how beautiful a guy
thinks you are because love is what makes
him feel that way not a small waist
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taylorsmom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Mar 2006 Posts: 25 Location: Port Lavaca, Texas
Posted: 03-22-06 12:17pm
babymajic0506
wrote:
i don't know how much I
believe that at 29 weeks a baby can be 6
lbs...I am 29 weeks as well and mine is
only 3..And that's large...
If your baby is already 6 lbs...He/she
will be a good 20lbs at birth....Imma have
to read up on this....
Sarah
i was thinking the same thing!!!! Dang
that's a big @ss baby! Do you have gd?
Mine was about 3lbs also and so I was
measuring further along that my due date!
But as far as your man not wanting
anything to do with you sexually.....Have
you talked to him about it? My dh went
through that from about 3 months. I
asked him if it was me. (i hadn't even
gained much) he just said "but your
pregnant!" I laughed and said yes I know.
I think there was so much else going on
in his mind. Finally after about 2 1/2 3
months he was fine. And he's back to how
he was. No our sex life isn't exactly
the same due to size! But he just said
"i would rather you gain 60lbs (i would
&*it however!) and have a healthy baby
then gain nothing and her be sick." I
think any dh/bf that is ugly to his dw/gf
is wrong. And there is something wrong
in that relationship. Maybe i'm a lucky
one...But he always says that a pregnant
woman is sexy. There's no way it can't
be. I hope things work out better for
you and he "grows" used to the idea of you
new (but temp.) tummy.
Remember, you are beautiful and the life
inside of you is even more!
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taylorsmom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Mar 2006 Posts: 25 Location: Port Lavaca, Texas
Posted: 03-22-06 12:36pm
babymajic0506
wrote:
i don't allow porn in my
relationship..It's cheating in my book...I
never did allow it..
It was very surprising when I told him in
the beginning that I didn't like it...He
said he didn't like it either....Strip
clubs don't come into the picture
either...They are both degrating to women
and if you think he thinking about you
while you're making love...It's probably
the girl in the porn or at the club he's
really thinking about...
Whew girls..I'm glad I don't have that
prob....One of my best friends' man is
like that and it was cool for her at
first...Now he might as well be having sex
with other girls....
Good luck honey!! I know how you feel
about not looking your best right
now...Just let him know exactly how you
feel about the situation and i'm sure
he'll change his actions!!
Sarah..
Ps..Show him an article that says sex is
ok until the last day of your pregnancy!!
Lol..Then he'll have no
excuses!!
i'm sorry but I have to laugh....I mean
yes....I can see that you would say that
porn can be degrating to woman. However
do you really think that because you don't
allow it that he's not seeing it or
anything????? I had an ex who swore he
didn't like porn and was "so not into
that"....Liar liar!!! I guess I dont'
see the harm in it. As long as it's not
taking over a mans life....Hell watch with
him. Do you know most men would love if
their wives would do things like that.
Maybe i'm different! (sorry) I love my
dh and I know he loves me. But I also
know that he's a man and going to relieve
stress in his own "way"....But he knows I
will too! So maybe ask him if he would
like to watch one with you or something.
Just some thoughts.
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Eyes Wide Shut
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 7892 Location: *UPTOWN*NEW ORLEANS*, La
Posted: 03-22-06 14:14pm
Lol...Honestly..I know he doesn't watch it
because he really doesn't have the time.
The real reason why I don't agree with
porn is because my father had an addiction
to it. It took over his life and split
him and my mom up. I've seen the damage
that porn can do when it's chosen over
you.
My fiance is a very understanding man and
realizes that my self esteem isn't that
great anyways so why add fuel to the fire
by watching porn.
In the beginning after telling him that I
didn't agree with porn, I thought he'd
give me a hard time or sneak itbehind my
back, but I guess I got lucky as hell!
Lol...He's never looked at another girl in
my presence or done something to make me
jealous. He's actually extreemely
sensitive to my feelings.
I do agree that a lot of men would sneak
it and do it behind my back so why not
join the fun, I just haven't come across
that obstacle yet in 3 1/2
years....(crossing my fingers!!!)
Joined: 16 Mar 2006 Posts: 25 Location: Port Lavaca, Texas
Posted: 03-22-06 16:44pm
babymajic0506
wrote:
lol...Honestly..I know he
doesn't watch it because he really doesn't
have the time.
The real reason why I don't agree with
porn is because my father had an addiction
to it. It took over his life and split
him and my mom up. I've seen the damage
that porn can do when it's chosen over
you.
My fiance is a very understanding man and
realizes that my self esteem isn't that
great anyways so why add fuel to the fire
by watching porn.
In the beginning after telling him that I
didn't agree with porn, I thought he'd
give me a hard time or sneak itbehind my
back, but I guess I got lucky as hell!
Lol...He's never looked at another girl in
my presence or done something to make me
jealous. He's actually extreemely
sensitive to my feelings.
I do agree that a lot of men would sneak
it and do it behind my back so why not
join the fun, I just haven't come across
that obstacle yet in 3 1/2
years....(crossing my fingers!!!)
that's great that he's like that. And
that's why my ex and I aren't together
anymore! However with the man i'm with
now it's different. I'm no way near as
insacure as I was in my 1st marriage.
And I can see it bothering you because yes
it sure can become some obssesive behavor.
Ours is an every once in a while thing.
Just to kinda "spice things up" I guess
you could say. But no, if it was all the
time I wouldn't like it at all. So yes I
do see your's and many womans points. We
have a different understanding in our
relationship and it works for us. But
being in your place....Oh no....I don't
think it would!
Glad you found a good one....We have to
hold on to them....They don't come around
very often!
Ladonna!!
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Eyes Wide Shut
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 7892 Location: *UPTOWN*NEW ORLEANS*, La
Posted: 03-22-06 16:54pm
Ain't that the truth girl!!! Whew...I'm
glad I found him!!
He's so silly. I swear, if he even bumps
into my belly he gets so nervous!!
Like,"is the baby ok, is she still
moving?!?!?" lol...He thinks that I need
to just lay around and make sure my baby
stays inside of me for as long as
possible! This is our first child
together so I can see why he's so antsy!
I was more paranoid in the beginning
thinking that the paranoia was over...Here
he comes .Mr .Paranoia himself!!
Sarah
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taylorsmom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Mar 2006 Posts: 25 Location: Port Lavaca, Texas
Posted: 03-22-06 17:03pm
babymajic0506
wrote:
ain't that the truth girl!!!
Whew...I'm glad I found him!!
He's so silly. I swear, if he even bumps
into my belly he gets so nervous!!
Like,"is the baby ok, is she still
moving?!?!?" lol...He thinks that I need
to just lay around and make sure my baby
stays inside of me for as long as
possible! This is our first child
together so I can see why he's so antsy!
I was more paranoid in the beginning
thinking that the paranoia was over...Here
he comes .Mr .Paranoia himself!!
Sarah
rofl....Well this is #2 for me and #3 for
him....So we know pretty much what to
expect with most things and are a little
more calm. But he's been great with not
making me feel like crap and fat and all
that normal stuff we feel! I went from a
size 3, 124lbs to 159 lbs and I feel like
a moose....All he could say was "well at
least you don't have chicken legs like
before...I happen to like it"! I laughed
at him and said whatever. But you know
it made me feel good when he says that
kind of thing. Guess that's why i'm so
much less insecure than before. My ex
didn't do that. But I have to say when
he was acting a little off for a few
months I was freaking out. I asked him
if it was me and me getting "fat" that was
causing him to not want to have sex. He
laughed and me and told me I looked great
but that he was just really tired. (he
had worse symptoms of being preggy than I
did!) and I knew he had a lot on his
mind. And like I said everything is
great now. He's going to be an amazing
dad. He's all excited about having a
girl. I'm glad.
That's good that your man is like that.
I would rather one be too parinoid than
one who could give a crap less. Take
advantage of the way he is! It's
great!
Ladonna
