i know im oly 13 but when i feel that im
fat or ugly, i choose a part of my body
that i dont like each day and learn to
love it!!, look at your face in the
mirror, look at the positive things about
your face, not the negative! by doing this
you may look more confindent and may look
more attractive because of this
confidence... it works with me thats how i
got a bf (not that im going out with him
anymore coz he moved to spain but that
doesnt matter and that has nothing to do
with this)
|
javaggg
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Apr 2007 Posts: 2 Location: , United Kingdom
Posted: 04-07-07 10:47am
I am 21 and I have the same problem.
People have always told me I'm ugly all my
life but now it's finally sunk in. I have
avoided all my friends which was unusual
for me because I use to go out to clubs,
rave's, house parties and lots of other
stuff. I was quite popular and I had a
good sense of humour, but it was my
friends who got all the girls. It didnt
bother me until about a year ago, I didnt
use to care but now I can't accept it. I
asked several girls out but they all
shunned me. like all girls have been doing
for years. I have been avoiding my friends
and now they've given up calling me which
is my own fault.
I'm afraid to even go outside the house
because I worry about girls and people in
general sayin God he is ugly! It has made
me hate everyone and everything I am
writing pages and pages of this caca every
night to try to vent some emotion.
I have considered suicide but I don't have
the guts to go through with it, and I
would hate to do that to my family.
I know 'looks is a shallow thing'. I dont
want to be good looking. I wish i was just
normal and could go outside like everyone
else.
The weather is nice, I wish I could go to
the beach or to a funfair down the road
but now I'm just stuck inside the home
playing video games and losing interest in
my life.
Anyway thanks for reading this guys (and
girls) I know there are people on this
forum with much worse problems than me but
I just had to get some of this off my
chest, I just can't find the strengh to
deal with it!
Re: I'm Ugly And Will Always Be Alone Posted: 04-19-07 08:40am
Hi, I'm a 19 year old female and after
reading your message i felt i had to reply
to it. Everyone has someone out there for
them, i really believe that. It doesnt
matter how you look, whether your fat or
thin, whether you look like an oil
painting or not! Everyone is special, and
besides, you sound like a really lovely
guy. Not all girls judge on looks.
I had a tough time as a teenager, i got
called names for the way i looked and
ended up in a very bad relationship. I
also felt like killing myself. But life
isnt about what you look like its about
being happy within yourself and not
letting anything hold you back. I got rid
of my boyfriend and concentrated on myself
and my future and forgot about my looks.
Im now living life for me. I suggest that
you take that first step. Get a new job,
go to university or college, get your own
house, take up a hobby...something that
really interests you.
You sound like you have such a lot to
give, please dont let ur looks hold u
back. Life is for living, people should
live like today is the last.
I wish you so much luck for the future.
Be happy
|
Clarkless
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Apr 2007 Posts: 9
Don't Give Up Posted: 04-19-07 14:57pm
No matter what you look like or what your
attitude is like. The facts remain the
same: You're only going to be alone if you
give up.
It sounds like you have already given up.
So I'm not going to waste anymore of my
time
I wish you the best of luck, lust and
love!
|
randomguy1
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jun 2007 Posts: 17 Location: US
Haaa Posted: 06-30-07 21:43pm
i grew up in a third world muslim country
as a kid... over there dating is "illegal"
u cant even hold hands of your gf if u can
find one in public places... real married
couples get into troubles with police and
hardliner militias sometimes... i aint
even jokin... i came to states at age 18,
being a unibrow, much hairier than avg
american guy at my age and had no
experience with girls at all... not even
one kiss! added i was about 50-60 lbs
overweight and my boobs looked fairly
weird for being a guy... i was in the same
mind set as u were in... but a lil
different and harsher
I still have not been successful at gettin
laid at age 22, but i've figured out 80%
of ppl out there are fake... they only
look for SEX and not relationship...and
thats a turn down for me...
i dont like uncontrolably horny or greedy
ppl
and i figured most girls fall for either
money or hot guys... results...
multiplemarriages and 50% rate of families
with single parents in america and many
many thousands of kids (teenagers) having
kids...
women sometimes fall for players and pimps
(not literally but many guys, matter of
fact most of them just want to be a player
with more than 1 gf) and they dont even
know why they do fall in such failing
luvs...
none lasts! look at the numbers and stats
many girls also want u for money they
flirt with u in club until u get em a
drink and suddenly they disappear or
somehow the refuse to hang out with u or
give u a number... well no different for
me! they are useless
matter of fact most avg ppl in street are
just like that
finding a good match, a real good match is
a hard thing to do... but trust me there
will be some1 out there for ya... and if
there is not... tell yourself "I'm the
caca" self-esteem is all it takes and
eventually u'll make some1 fall in luv
with u... be yourself... if u r a nerd and
into school thats a turn on for some more
intelligent girls
try to maintain confidence at all times,
dont lose yourself...i'm still having
trouble doing this but i can tell i'm way
better than 4 years ago and now i know its
only a matter of time and losing some more
weight to be able to find me a girl...
after all know this: want it from god,
quit masturbating if u do, and be
confident... u'll get it... it requires a
great "will" on your side to maintain your
confidence
u think bill gates was attractive when he
was young??? look where he is standing
now!!
and remember u'll only need 1 true love in
your whole life... not experiencing the
same thing others are doing is only giving
u an advantage
i know that guys who are virgins when they
are older are sometimes turn on for some
certain type of girls... those other ones
who think u wont be good in bed... well
they are only ignorant losers most of
america consists of... no doubt! they
remain losers for the rest of their lives
trust me... there are millions of 'em out
there... and know something else...
WHY DO U THINK WE HAVE A PROBLEM CALLED
MID-LIFE CRISIS???
CUZ ALL THE YOUTH IS SPENT ON SEX WITH
MULTIPLE PARTNERS AND BY THE TIME PPL LOSE
THEIR ACTUAL PHYSICAL ATTRACTIVENESS THEY
BECOME REALLY DEPRESSED AND TROUBLED!!!!
so keep all of that in mind before
begining to get upset
thats my 2 cents!
a non-muslim musilm virgin! who will one
day become womens favorite man through his
character and wisdom
|
randomguy1
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jun 2007 Posts: 17 Location: US
Re: Plastic Surgery Posted: 06-30-07 21:49pm
bita
wrote:
I dont think that helps him.
And that was somewhat uncalled for.
Its not about looks. Even if someone is
ugly they can be really
nice
well, I think it'd help him more than
anything else! And it seems that he is
concered about how he looks, so yeah...
and yes ur right,
they might be nice,
but what we first see is ones appearance.
[/quote]
not to disrespect anyone... but this is
exactly the common dumb judgment i was
talking about... ppl are after your look
at first point... so they are idiots...
cuz any beauty will make'em do anything!
your look will vanish in less than 10
years... u start gettin older and
eventually everyone in natural form @ age
40 looks uglier than their 20s
some who faced problems at that age...
come up with plastic surgery which is such
a loser way of expressing yourself... that
means you dont count yourself good
enough... (celebrities are
different...they have adif lifestyle and
story and personality)
and as some other friend said it...
personality
i know a few guys in their 40s who can
pickup any girl they want... they all have
big bellys due to too much beer drinking
and one of them is half bald! but he can
do it smooth and easy.... its all about
being yourself and u shoudl portrait a
very good image of yourself in your mind!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Posted: 06-30-07 21:51pm
define the word "ugly"
|
randomguy1
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jun 2007 Posts: 17 Location: US
One Last Thing Posted: 06-30-07 22:03pm
- no1 can figure out your problems better
than yourself, not 1 sichologist (wrong
dictation i know) can do it... not one
medication
and if u need medication only stick with
some sweet mj if u catch my drift...
just say medical question whoever dont
like u for any reason and satisfy
yourself... keep yourself happy but dont
exceed your limits or get yourself
dependant on anything! MAINTAIN! and keep
it cool
watch stewie in family guy and try to
learn from him... he's one of the best
models of character for me... watch as
many episodes as u can.... he is
ironically a baby character but he always
thinks of himself as the caca!!!! thats
the spirit!
|
young Girl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 13932 Location: everythings better in, texas USA
Re: One Last Thing Posted: 06-30-07 22:08pm
randomguy1
wrote:
- no1 can figure out your
problems better than yourself, not 1
sichologist (wrong dictation i know) can
do it... not one medication
and if u need medication only stick with
some sweet mj if u catch my drift...
just say whoops whoever dont like u for
any reason and satisfy yourself... keep
yourself happy but dont exceed your limits
or get yourself dependant on anything!
MAINTAIN! and keep it cool
watch stewie in family guy and try to
learn from him... he's one of the best
models of character for me... watch as
many episodes as u can.... he is
ironically a baby character but he always
thinks of himself as the health
question!!!! thats the
spirit!
ha ha stewie is the worst rold model ever!
trying to kill his parents and destroy the
world?!?!?
i dont think anyone can tell you a damn
thing about yourself
in the end when you find yourself and true
happiness you will have eliminated ugly
from your vocabulary
theres always SOMETHING wrong with
everyone
no one is perfect...
and whoever says or thinks they're
perfect... has crabs...
lol no just kidding
but for serious
life is beautiful
dont waste it away in the mirror
|
watergirlkt
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Jul 2007 Posts: 1 Location: haskell,nj
Lonely But Hopeful........ Posted: 07-20-07 21:55pm
my name is kate i am ugly too i know the
pain of being "different" aka ugly its a
lonely life sometimes i get so lonely i
want to junp off a bridge. i know the pain
of pretending that i dont know that im
ugly. i know the pain of pretending that i
am g happy for a friend that just got
engaged while living in my misery. im sick
of being the fat jolly girl damm it i am
not happy. i know that i wil never be
happy i just wasnt meant to have the
husband and 2.5kids that the rest of
america has im 36 now and im sick of my
pretty friends tellling me that there is
someone for everyone not for me not in
this life'.
i was in love love with a crack head once
ok maybe i still am lol, he cheated on me
with with girls that at the time i thought
were uglyier than me but then i learned
that they were not i was even uglier than
them. i want you all to understand i just
dint mean looks i have a rotton pesonality
too i have never been told that but i must
have one by the way my current problem
boyfriend treats me. ugly peaple lets
unite and pro create god needs more of us
so the shiny peaple can stand out ok sorry
for the horrible spelling im drunk again
an feeli' sorry fo my ugly slf
|
somemakekithappen
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 2
Posted: 08-08-07 17:04pm
i feel that all the time....
but u know what??
i really think that personality is ALL
that counts!!
u seem like a really sweet guy and the
internet websites are NOT for u!!
all it has are ppl that are looking to get
laid by hott ppl....very shallow
|
nomisme
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Aug 2007 Posts: 1 Location: LA
Posted: 08-13-07 12:21pm
javaggg
wrote:
I am 21 and I have the same
problem. People have always told me I'm
ugly all my life but now it's finally sunk
in. I have avoided all my friends which
was unusual for me because I use to go out
to clubs, rave's, house parties and lots
of other stuff. I was quite popular and I
had a good sense of humour, but it was my
friends who got all the girls. It didnt
bother me until about a year ago, I didnt
use to care but now I can't accept it. I
asked several girls out but they all
shunned me. like all girls have been doing
for years. I have been avoiding my friends
and now they've given up calling me which
is my own fault.
I'm afraid to even go outside the house
because I worry about girls and people in
general sayin God he is ugly! It has made
me hate everyone and everything I am
writing pages and pages of this health
question every night to try to vent some
emotion.
I have considered suicide but I don't have
the guts to go through with it, and I
would hate to do that to my family.
I know 'looks is a shallow thing'. I dont
want to be good looking. I wish i was just
normal and could go outside like everyone
else.
The weather is nice, I wish I could go to
the beach or to a funfair down the road
but now I'm just stuck inside the home
playing video games and losing interest in
my life.
Anyway thanks for reading this guys (and
girls) I know there are people on this
forum with much worse problems than me but
I just had to get some of this off my
chest, I just can't find the strengh to
deal with it!
Every detail in your response is exactly
what happening to me from my last 6-7
years, everyday, 24 hours(except the time
for sleep). I cannot agree with you
anymore.
I have recurrent thoughts about this idea
and always think of committing suicide.
I lose all my energy when looking into the
mirrors.
I stay home playing video games and have
no social life. I feel crappy when pretty,
tall girls walk pass me. I adore handsome
looking men and wish to be one of them.
I ve lost all my strenght in my study and
entertainments. This kind of damn thoughts
have been killing tons of my brain cells
in the past 6-7 years.
I frequently post my experience and how I
get depressed and frustrated with my
unattractive looking on major forums.
However the problems are still problems.
No solutions can be reached. Am i gonna be
depressed for my whole life?
btw, i am turning 22 this year.
|
javaggg
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Apr 2007 Posts: 2 Location: , United Kingdom
Posted: 09-08-07 12:04pm
Thanks guys. I have read carefully what
you have all told me and you've made me
feel a little better.
I still find it difficuly because I fall
in love with people so easily and it hurts
because I know they are 'automaticaly'
(< did I spell that right?) not
interested in me. If I just looked
'average' I think I could have a
girlfriend so easily because I am good at
communicating with people and have a good
sense of humour. Face to face I can make
girls laugh easily, I just got that kind
of personality and body language.
I get jelous when I see normal guys
driving in their cars with their normal
girlfriends, it's like a natural part of
life that will be difficult for me to
experience. And I have read that
relationships usualy do not work if the
couple do not find each other attractive
(not necesserily HOT).
And just for the record... I am 5 ft 7
inches. I am not fat and I am very
muscular due to my job. So it feels like I
am already at my best so no matter what I
do nobody will want me. It feels horrific
from certain points of view.
All you people out there who are
overweight, I am begging you. PLEASE! do
not give up just because you're
overweight. Slim down and make a go of
your life. If most fat people were slim
most would have attractive features.
Something I will never have. PLEASE dont
give up because I will do ANYTHING to be
in your position.
GOOD LUCK ALL OF YOU! and thanks to all
those who gave me some of their time and
advice I appreciate it.
(I am currently in love with somebody now.
She is not HOT. Or Good-Looking by our
society, but in my eyes she is the most
beautiful creature on Earth.)
|
daydreamer82
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Oct 2007 Posts: 1
Im In the Same Boat. Posted: 10-21-07 12:17pm
Im in the same boat.
Only difference is im 25
www.myspace.com/aftereight
25 for pics of me
Ive done the whole dating sites, match.com
membership ran out the other wk, after
doing the pay 4 6months, if u dont get a
date, get 6months free. One yr later not a
single reply apart from sum1 wanting
money. Tried well over 20 different dating
sites etc. Neva replied to, yet sometimes
i can send the msg limit and still neva
hear anything.
I also have neva had a serious gf, i
havent even had a cuddle in 6yrs and yet
ppl round me keep saying it will happen
soon. I hate hearing ppl say how do u live
without sex, i cant even go without it for
a wk, try 6yrs mate see how u cope.
All the replies ive seen on here saying oh
its them who have something wrong with
them not you, not every1s like that, WHERE
ARE THEY THEN? we msg 100s on website, we
meet ppl at work, pub, clubs, hobbies etc
EVERYONE JUDGES u, u go out looking like
us and no1 will even bother to get to know
you. All those ppl that say personality
comes first, thats bull, those ppl wont
even bother 2 get 2 know ur personality
inless they are attracted 2 u in the first
place. I have neva once met any1 who hasnt
judged me on my looks first, n ive met
alot.
As for ppl sayin it will happen soon,
screw u, no it wont, i heard ppl saying it
will happen soon 6yrs ago, how soon is
soon exactly? i have 2 watch n hear bout
all my family members coupled up, friends
etc. every xmas, wedding etc, im always
the singleton.
then ppl say ur special one will come
soon. wat im only eva suppose 2b with one
person whilst every1 else around me gets 2
have sex, one nighters, fun, short, long
term relationships good and bad and im
suppose just get the one. For one i dont
believe at all u will know wat exactly u
want from sum1 til uve experienced all
those things.. I had 2 put up with my best
mate bringing a different girl home every
few days when i was at uni, then finally
finding sum1 his been with for over 4yrs,
he cheats, yet he still gets keep her. I
have 2 put up with lil sis bringing guys
back every time she goes out. i cant
handle it anymore.
|
CarolDiane
Moderator
Joined: 23 Sep 2007 Posts: 2392 Location: ,
Thanks: 111
Thanked:156
Personality Posted: 10-21-07 14:38pm
Just remember, it is your personality that
counts. Your self esteem is the pits and
you have to change that. You need to have
confidence in yourself. I am willing to
bet you have a wonderful personality and a
great guy to be with. I'll bet you have a
great sense of humor too. Don't give up on
yourself like this. Give yourself more
credit then you have been.
Carrie
|
Enlightened Uselessness
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Sep 2007 Posts: 86 Location: ,
Re: Im In the Same Boat. Posted: 10-21-07 14:58pm
daydreamer82
wrote:
Im in the same boat.
Only difference is im 25
www.myspace.com/aftereight
25 for pics of me
Ive done the whole dating sites, match.com
membership ran out the other wk, after
doing the pay 4 6months, if u dont get a
date, get 6months free. One yr later not a
single reply apart from sum1 wanting
money. Tried well over 20 different dating
sites etc. Neva replied to, yet sometimes
i can send the msg limit and still neva
hear anything.
I also have neva had a serious gf, i
havent even had a cuddle in 6yrs and yet
ppl round me keep saying it will happen
soon. I hate hearing ppl say how do u live
without sex, i cant even go without it for
a wk, try 6yrs mate see how u cope.
All the replies ive seen on here saying oh
its them who have something wrong with
them not you, not every1s like that, WHERE
ARE THEY THEN? we msg 100s on website, we
meet ppl at work, pub, clubs, hobbies etc
EVERYONE JUDGES u, u go out looking like
us and no1 will even bother to get to know
you. All those ppl that say personality
comes first, thats bull, those ppl wont
even bother 2 get 2 know ur personality
inless they are attracted 2 u in the first
place. I have neva once met any1 who hasnt
judged me on my looks first, n ive met
alot.
As for ppl sayin it will happen soon,
screw u, no it wont, i heard ppl saying it
will happen soon 6yrs ago, how soon is
soon exactly? i have 2 watch n hear bout
all my family members coupled up, friends
etc. every xmas, wedding etc, im always
the singleton.
then ppl say ur special one will come
soon. wat im only eva suppose 2b with one
person whilst every1 else around me gets 2
have sex, one nighters, fun, short, long
term relationships good and bad and im
suppose just get the one. For one i dont
believe at all u will know wat exactly u
want from sum1 til uve experienced all
those things.. I had 2 put up with my best
mate bringing a different girl home every
few days when i was at uni, then finally
finding sum1 his been with for over 4yrs,
he cheats, yet he still gets keep her. I
have 2 put up with lil sis bringing guys
back every time she goes out. i cant
handle it
anymore.
Ugh, well that was like looking into the
future. I suggest plastic surgery.
|
FoodDRadio
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Sep 2007 Posts: 70 Location: ,
Posted: 10-21-07 15:21pm
This may in fact sound mean, but its the
honest truth of my opinion. If you're
ugly, you're ugly, but don't let that be
your defining feature. You need to start
finding things about yourself other than
looks because even if you ARE ugly, those
features should be your redeeming
qualities.
|
ziggy29
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Oct 2007 Posts: 4
Posted: 10-21-07 15:47pm
I can relate to a lot of this. I don't
really have much to add other than what
has been said, though.
I'm 42 now. I never really had a
"girlfriend" before my wife, whom I met
online when I was 26. In fact, for most
of that time I was lucky to have one date
a year. I was the "sweet guy" that all
the young ladies wanted to fix up with
friends and acquaintances, but never date
themselves. "You deserve to be happy with
someone," they'd often say...but always
with someone else.
I was balding by age 16 and lost almost
everything off the top by 18, and I'm only
a little over 5' 7". Neither of those
exactly boosted my self-esteem.
I know it's cliche, it's corny and it's
hard to believe, but in my case it was
true: you'll find it where you least
expect it. Why is that? I have a theory.
When you're not actively looking for it,
you can just be yourself. You don't dwell
on what you don't have and your real self
can come out. It's not the artificial
self we paint on ourselves in order to get
attention from the opposite sex. In my
case, that means when I was "not expecting
it," I was not dwelling on loneliness or
whether or not the next person I met was
going to be the one (which would cause me
to act unnatural and goofy around them).
I was not wearing insecurity on my sleeve,
though my heart was (and to some degree,
still is) full of insecurity.
I wish there was a magic bullet. I know
how loneliness feels; I experienced it for
well over a decade after I "discovered"
girls. And had I not lucked into that one
chance encounter, there's a good chance I
can still be there. So to that I would
say, "there but for the grace of God go
I."
Wish I had better advice, but all I can
say is that in my experience, the harder
you try to make it happen, the more
elusive it might become. An easygoing
personality and self-confidence are, I've
learned, even more important than the
height and the hair on the head, both of
which I do not have. And I know
self-confidence is difficult in this
situation...which is why it so often
happens when and where you're not trying
to make it happen.
|
summerXx
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Nov 2007 Posts: 2
Heyxx Posted: 11-01-07 15:09pm
hey,OMG you do not realise how much looks
matter to a girl!--i would so not care if
the guy had an ugly face,if i liked his
personality i would automatically think
his face was perfect! like i'm in Love
with this guy now and even though mos t of
my friends think he's ugly i think he's
perfect...i don't know why i love him but
i do! As they say "Knowones perfect until
u fall in love with them!" Xxx
