Joined: 11 Nov 2005 Posts: 30 Location: Deland,Florida
to Young? Posted: 01-26-06 00:16am
Ok im 16 almost 17 do you think that thats
too young to have a kid cuz I really want
one and so does my boyfriend
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poohbear101
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Nov 2004 Posts: 383
Posted: 01-26-06 00:30am
Wait. You're only 16 you have plenty of
time to have babies. You're not even out
of high school yet. And what if you want
to go to college later? Travel? Have a
career? There's so much you can do while
you're not tied down with a baby. I'm not
saying that if you have a baby you still
can't do those things but it's just going
to be that much harder. And your bf may
tell you now that he wants one but what
happens down the road when (if) he changes
his mind. He can walk away but that baby
is you're responsibility forever. Finish
school, figure out what you want to do
with you're life and make sure you're in a
stable and secure relantionship before
making such a big decision.
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JeNnAnCoRy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Nov 2005 Posts: 30 Location: Deland,Florida
Posted: 01-26-06 00:40am
Me and my boyfriend have been together for
2 yrs now and I know he wouldnt just walk
out on me. Im almost 17 and I have 2 jobs
im almost out of school as soon as I take
me ged test. Im sure that I can get
through it but im not planning on actually
getting preggo untill im 17 but im just
trying to get info on how I could get
preggo but I just might already be so im
just trying to see if it would be to soon?
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oh_mommy
Supporter
Joined: 04 Sep 2005 Posts: 3694 Location: vancouver island, bc canada
Posted: 01-26-06 02:25am
I dont think your too young, but yeah
waiting isnt that bad of an idea, personly
I dont think anyone at any age is really
ever ready for a baby 100% but if u get
preggy u deal with it, and you'll do just
fine
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hunterjumper
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Dec 2005 Posts: 203 Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posted: 01-26-06 05:50am
I support the right to choose but I also
think about the childs welfare. And
rushing in to parenting is usually based
on unrealistic expectations of parenthood
and lack of realism with family planning
which tends to hurt kids. If you and your
boyfriend trust each other and love each
other, what is the rush? Neither of you
are going anywhere so waiting at least a
year or two shouldn't make a difference.
Why not wait until you are actually
legally an adult? It causes a lot less
problems and people accept you a lot more
then.
Why not wait until you are finish with
your schooling? At least with high
school? Many college courses can be taken
through evening or night classes, or only
consist of going a couple days a week.
You can't do that with highschool and it
really becomes a hundred times harder when
it suddenly costs you $800 a month to go
to school 6 hours a day. And when you
have to find a daycare and there's wait
lists two years long. And they don't want
infants.
Why not wait until you can talk to your
family and get their support? You will
need it and chances are, they'll accept it
a lot more if you're a graduated 18 year
old adult then a 16 year old minor in
grade 10 or 11.
Why not wait until you have the education?
I see you asking a lot of questions
around here and that's a good thing, but
if you got pregnant within the next month
or two it would be a rush to information.
Why not take time to educate yourself
slowly on as much as possible? That's the
best way to avoid problems and keep your
child safe.
Why not wait until you have a pelvic exam
(most girls don't have their first until
they're at least 18) and are all checked
out and healthy to even try for a child?
Even if you think you're healthy, there
may be underlying problems that you don't
even realize. Have you also gone through
both yours and the fathers health history?
Family history? Looked at the genetics?
Are there any conditions there that might
pop up in your child? Downs syndrome?
Autism? Add? Adhd? Cerebral palsy?
Allergies? Spinal bifida? Mental
illness? All those things are highly
genetic and can add a lot of strain to
parents.
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~rubmybuddahbelly~
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Jan 2006 Posts: 752 Location: :( N.O. Evacuee now in TEXAS
Posted: 01-26-06 08:56am
I cant say to tell you oh dont do that
your to young because I did just turn 17
and I did plan for my baby ( im 6 months
preggo ). All I really can say is it's
not as easy and fun as it looks standing
on the inside then to standing and
watching from a distance. Lol me and the
father of my child have gotten to the
point where we really do love each other
to death and he told me just the other
night that he still does want a family.
Im the one with the insecurities now tho.
Everything gets really confussing cause I
thought that I had thought about
everything and I was sure on what I wanted
but I wasn't. I'm thinking about it all
now. Me and the father of my baby were
together ever since his first daughter was
born she'll be 3 in june, and I played a
huge roll in her life and at first the
thought popped in my head that oh I want
one there so cute, and I think thats what
all teenagers say. Then we got really
serious we moved in together we were
around each other all the time I got off
birth control and we said ok we want a
baby. Then once I got pregnant I started
looking at everything he did and all the
downs that we had gone threw and I was
like do I really want a child around all
this and so I left him. I started a
fight really which was justifyable but
still we could ahve just talked about it
and it ended up me staying in texas with
my mom and he went back to louisiana.
I've talked to him every once in a while
and he's tryed the whole its not mine but
then he comes back crying and says that he
said it out of anger. He still really
wants this baby ( so he says ) and it's
kinda me with all the questions now. I
really think you should think things
threw with you. Sit down and have a chat
with your thoughts and see how you really
feel. Dont just look at right now but
think about farther down the road with a
baby. It's not always the guy chickening
out of the relashonship. Things get
really confussing exspcially when your
bringing another life into it. Im not
saying dont do it or your stupid or
anything like that. Just think. Ok and
if u need anyone to talk to you can hit me
up and i'll get back to you.
Hehehe and you and ur bf's anmes kinda
match me and mine...
Im jenna and the father of my baby is
casey...Lol
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Cambion
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 748
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 01-26-06 10:58am
Having a child at any age isn't easy. Let
me ask this - what are the main reasons
for wanting to have a child? If you want
one because "something's missing in your
life" or "so I can have something to
love", then for the love of all that's
holy, do not go and get knocked up.
Babies are a huge responsibility - it's
not going to just be playing with the baby
all day for 10 years. It's a lot of hard
work, sleepless nights, and misery. There
will be times you want to rip your hair
out. The baby will melt your heart for
about a week or two, and then reality hits
you like a ton of bricks. Nothing but
feeding, changing dirty diapers, and
incessant crying - that'll pretty much be
your new lifestyle for 2-3 years, until
the sprog can walk and it [hopefully]
potty-trained. Once they're mobile, then
they can run away from you, get into small
spaces to hide from you - the insanity
escalates to the next level.
You must think about all the work that
goes into caring for a kid, and even if
you are working two jobs, you could still
be hurting for money once junior arrives.
You'll need to pay for doctor visits, baby
food, diapers, a crib, a stroller,
clothes, bottles, and all the other crap
needed to properly care for a baby.
Will you be able to handle the rumors and
ridicule of classmates when word gets out
that you got pregnant?
Also, what if your child was born with
some kind of illness or deformity? What
if your child had autism, add/adhd,
tourette's, or any of the other such
mental conditions? Kids with such
disorders are twice the handful that
normal kids are. What if your child had a
defective heart, or underdeveloped lungs,
or they had something that required them
to take medication for the rest of their
lives? That's even more misery in your
life as well as money needing to be forked
over for more frequent doctor visits. Do
you know if you have any kind of inherited
ailment that you could possibly pass on to
your potential offspring?
Do not impulsively decide to have a child
- you will be kicking yourself for it when
you realize that parenthood isn't a bowl
of cherries like most people say it is.
It's the hardest job to do, if it's done
right. Way too many "parents" do a crappy
job of parenting because they're lazy and
stupid.
In conclusion, all i'll say is I hope you
make the choice that's right for you,
whatever it may be.
I'm 17 & never thought about getting
pregnant on purpose.
I am confused of what's with people now
days, wanting to cut your childhood short
to raise a baby which you can do your
whole entire life. Having a baby young
you are considered high risk, which means
there are tons of possible problems added
on to the ones you could already have.
What would be the difference if you had a
child now or waited until later?
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diamondsz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3173 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 74
Thanked:104
Posted: 01-26-06 11:41am
The best age for kids is 18-35 cause
before or after this age there can be
maternal problems or problems with the
baby
we didnt have anything at first but we
didnt use protection so I know I could get
pregnant anytime but it was something to
look forward too..
I was 19 when I got pregnant with elisa
and I love it sometimes she drives me mad
like cambion said there is times you want
to pull your hair out but its not
everyday. Kids are very demanding and I
think if anyone has more patience then
me(im very impatient) then you can do it,
wait till you finsih school though at
least.
Im not going to say dont have a kid cause
then I would be a hypocrite the advice I
give you is to wait another year or two,
there is some hardwork that comes with
kids but at the same time its easy hard to
explain till you actually have one. The
first few months are just crazy me and
hubby had alot of fights cause we were
both exhausted and he was working all the
time.
~kids are expensive~
there is a trick to this buy everything
ahead of time and take hand me downs
because they wear out their clothing so
fast elisa has all her clothing up to size
6t and shes only in 24 months now. As
for diapers pile up ahead of time more on
size 3/4 they seem to stay in these longer
but every baby is different.
If you do get pregnant good luck it is a
life changing expierence!~
jess
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AlliE_18
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Dec 2005 Posts: 2129 Location: uk
Posted: 01-26-06 18:33pm
I think you should wait until you finish
school and college, because then you can
get a job easier after u have the
baby....Rather than having to start all
over and go back to studying.
I think teens want a baby because like
diamondsz said, its something for you to
look forward to, teenage years are really
difficult and unhappy for many and I think
they feel a baby will brighten their life
up, or they dont get on with their parents
so they feel unloved and having a baby
gives them something to love and 'be loved
back by'......"babies take a lot more love
than they give" though. Also if your in
love with a guy and things arent going
that well with him, a lot of people older
ones too..Think having a baby will make
their relationship stronger and closer but
in reality it puts it under a bigger
strain. Some feel they wouldnt be good at
doing anything with their life but they
like the idea of doing the mother job so
they become a mother. Or you think
theres nothing better to do so get
pregnant to do something new and
exciting.....Motherhood is for life though
not just for ....Christmas? Lol my 2
cents! Probably more reasons aswell but
its very common for teens to want a baby
and plan one then lie to everyone that it
was an accident.
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JeNnAnCoRy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Nov 2005 Posts: 30 Location: Deland,Florida
Posted: 01-26-06 23:59pm
Im not actually planning on getting preg.
But if it happens it happens theres not
much I could do about it but untill I do
im just wondering if im being stupid to
not use protection at my age
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mum2bubba
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Oct 2005 Posts: 251 Location: Australia
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 01-27-06 06:40am
I personally don't think 17 is too young
but it depends on your situation, I have a
girlfriend who had her first child at 17,
but her and the baby's father are married
(hes 10 years older) she is now 19 and
pregnant again with their 2nd child, but
there are other 17 year olds who get
pregnant who can't rais their kids (lack
of support, no money etc) if you are
pregnant then you need to tell your
parents or someone so you can (hopefully)
get some support but if you're only
thinking about it I would maybe wait a
little while and prepare for a baby first
(finish school etc)
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hunterjumper
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Dec 2005 Posts: 203 Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posted: 01-27-06 07:21am
Yes, it's stupid.
Unprotected sex = ttc. Just because
you're not charting your cervical mucous
doesn't mean you're not trying to
conceive. You passively are.
If you don't want to get pregnant now, use
protection every single time. Otherwise,
you are trying to get pregnant and will
likely become pregnant within the next 4-6
months.
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Ms_sweetie_18
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Nov 2005 Posts: 47 Location: Mississippi
Posted: 01-27-06 09:14am
I'm 18 almost 19 and still a virgin and I
want a baby I talk 2 my mama bout it and
she say its ok but I tho bout college
first 2 major n nursing r radiologist ( x
rays). So i'm sayn wait till u get out of
school. I have a cousin that had a baby
a;most 2 years ago and while she n
college I got her baby taking her 2 the
doctor, feedin and chaging aint easy I had
her since she was 2 moths now she 17
months. So plzzz wait
im not actually planning on
getting preg. But if it happens it
happens theres not much I could do about
it but untill I do im just wondering if im
being stupid to not use protection at my
age
whatever happens happens?
That is trying to get pregnant
hunny...Your obviously not doing anything
to prevent it so you are trying to get
pregnant.
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Angel_Who_Crys
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Aug 2005 Posts: 181 Location: In The Darkness
Posted: 01-28-06 02:49am
Trust me wait tell you are older sweetie.
Im 17 and 24 weeks pregnant. It was
planed but now im starting to think me and
my love should have waited a bit longer.
Its not all fun being pregnant. I still
get moring sickness, im always in pain
from my back and peoplke are stressing me
out more then I need to be.Beacuse of
rescent things me and my love are now dont
have enough money to move out and have to
stay at his parents place. Im so stressed
its not funny, but it was not a mistake
and I will get thro it. I cant wait to
hold my little girl.
But really sweetie wait a few more years,
you really dont want that stress on you.
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~rubmybuddahbelly~
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Jan 2006 Posts: 752 Location: :( N.O. Evacuee now in TEXAS
Posted: 01-28-06 10:41am
hunterjumper
wrote:
yes, it's stupid.
Unprotected sex = ttc. Just because
you're not charting your cervical mucous
doesn't mean you're not trying to
conceive. You passively are.
If you don't want to get pregnant now, use
protection every single time. Otherwise,
you are trying to get pregnant and will
likely become pregnant within the next 4-6
months.
ok could u have been more of an
problem... Just cause you aren't using
anything to protect yourself dosent mean
ur ttc. Its stupid if yes ur not using
protection and then you freak out cause
you might be pregnant. I am 17 and I am
pregnant and I did plan my baby. I am not
with the father of my baby and im happy
because I think withput him around my baby
will have a better life. My child has me
its older sister its older sisters mom who
is also my childs nany.. Thats all the
family and support that my child needs.
Im not saying its all going to be easy and
everyone that is 17 and 16 should go get
pregnant. Thats not close to what im
saying but if you have really set down and
thought aboput everything and done some
what of family planning then I think it's
ok. One thing I do wanna say is all these
little girls who come on her and they are
like omg I might be pregnant me and my
boyfriend had unprotected sex. Thats
stupid and its not just the risk of
pregnancy. What about std's people im
sure they arent fun. I'm almost posotive
they arent cause I myself have the hpv
virus which is a sexually transmitted
disease. I live in texas and my sisters
teacher used to work at a local highschool
and they did a blood drive and 25% of the
students had hiv or aids can u imagine
thats highschool students. So a baby is
the least of you guys worries.
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hunterjumper
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Dec 2005 Posts: 203 Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posted: 01-28-06 14:50pm
~rubmybuddahbelly~
wrote:
ok could u have been more of
an problem..
yes, I could have. I could have been
incredibly rude. I could have been
juvenile and called her names. I didn't.
She asked if it was stupid to not use any
sort of protection when she didn't want to
get pregnant now. That's like playing
russian roulette if you don't want to die.
It is stupid.
Quote:
just cause you
aren't using anything to protect yourself
dosent mean ur
ttc
yes it does. If you don't want a baby,
you take steps not to have one.
Protection fails and that's one thing.
But to not want a baby and take no steps
to not have one is stupid and it does mean
you are trying to have one. Otherwise,
you would be using condoms at least. As I
said...Just becuase you're not going crazy
and charting cervical mucous doesn't mean
you're not ttc. Plenty of couples ttc
just by not using anything.
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jewelskye
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 172 Location: Los Angeles
Posted: 01-29-06 04:15am
Personally, I think you should wait. I'm
a freshman in high school and i'm about
twenty one weeks pregnant with twins.
Before I got pregnant, I had dreams. I
wanted to go to college, become an author,
get my major in english lit, travel the
world. It's gonna be harder now.
My half sister and I have been going baby
shopping, and everything is very
expensive, expecially since i'm having
two. I think that you should wait until
you graduate at least, and maybe go to
college? At least make sure that your
relationship with your boyfriend will not
break if you get pregnant, and make sure
he won't run if he decides he's too young
for fatherhood. Ultimately, you'll be the
one with more problems - you'll have this
baby growing inside you, and you might
even be alone. You can't just leave it
behind, not for nine long, difficult,
emotiotional months, anyway.
Just think about it carefully before you
make your decision.
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~rubmybuddahbelly~
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Jan 2006 Posts: 752 Location: :( N.O. Evacuee now in TEXAS
Posted: 01-29-06 14:27pm
I didnt see anything of her saying or
asking if it was stupid to be having
unprotected sex if she didnt want a
baby... She posted asking if she was to
young..
