I am schizophrenic and no matter what I do
im hurting & crying all the time im in
college & everything is extremely
difficult.
I have a hard time with my work, life in
general & the pain of knowing everyone
around me is normal & im not is
unbearable (so unfair, & no one
understands). I have no friends here; in
highschool I hardly had any friends &
I have never been in a real relationship
(im 23 yrs).
When everyone else always talks about all
their friends & their best friends
& all their relationships, I always
feel so left out, hurt & rejected
bcause I don't have any of those things
(im 23 years) & always stay silent
bcause I cant talk about it (i feel so
unbelievably left out). I feel as if god
has rejected me; as if I wasn't good
enough to have those simple things. And
even if if I do get those things, I have
to live with the shame of my past.
If it was up to me, iwould have killed
myself so many years ago. I wanna die so
bad, I feel so alone at this university
& in this world & want so much to
commit suicide; I would have done it today
if I had the courage; cant take
anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What's the point of living when you're
being tortured every single day?
Anything to end the pain.
I want to kill myself this very moment;
does anyone care or understand?
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
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KatieFlower
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Feb 2006 Posts: 407 Location: Massachusetts, U>S>A
Posted: 02-15-06 17:01pm
Sometimes I feel the same
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amIskitzo
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2006 Posts: 23
Posted: 02-15-06 17:13pm
People care, but they cannot understand
what your going through.
I think thats what the problem is, if they
understood, I guess they'd be more
caring.
When you feel so alone, think that theres
atleast 50 million others in this world
who experience what you experience, so
your not alone.
Don't give up, theres a cure coming, i'm
sure of that
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AlliE_18
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Dec 2005 Posts: 2129 Location: uk
Posted: 02-15-06 19:44pm
Everyone feels misunderstood about things.
I dont know what you're going through,
but think of the people who love you.
Like your family? They dont understand
how you feel inside, but they love you to
pieces even if they dont always show it.
Don't leave them, they need you to be here
even if you dont think so. Think of how
much pain it would put them through if you
killed yourself. *hugs*
