In the last six months I have started not
eating for days or making myself sick when
I do.
But this morning I cut myself as a
punishment for eating. I dont think I
have a problem I dont look like I have an
eating disorder but friends and fam keep
hassling me about it.
Can anyone help me understand this and
does anyone else cut up as punishment or
am I just a freak? :(
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inezrina
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Oct 2005 Posts: 174
Posted: 02-07-06 13:54pm
Hey you are not a freak you are here for
all the same reasons we are. You do have
an eating disorder I know how you feel
though like it isn't as bad or it is
really an eating disorder because you
don't look like you have one. I have had
an eating disorder for pretty much ten
years and I don't look like I have one.
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mxgurlie101
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Dec 2005 Posts: 92 Location: maryland
Dont Worry Im Right There With Ya Posted: 02-07-06 15:09pm
I am the same way I cut as a punishment
although for the past month or so ive been
in treatment for my ed so I haven't done
it in a while. Just like inezrina said we
r here for the same reasons. I used to be
just like you the same not looking or
feeling like I had an ed but it was a
distortion and my friends and family def
saw it. Hope this makes u feel better :)
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 724
Thanks: 0
Thanked:4
Posted: 03-07-06 08:28am
I feel just like you.... I feel I need
control to stop eating. If I think i'm
not gonna stop eating after I start, I
just don't eat at all. Anyway, I always
thinnk i've over eaten when I eat
something...
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Pepi85
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Mar 2006 Posts: 4 Location: UK
Your Not the Only One!!! Posted: 03-08-06 09:52am
Hey, your not alone, I used to cut my arms
for years and ceased about 6 months ago,
but more recenlty I feel the need to cut
again, im out of a job and feel low and
sh*ty all the time, I recently found out I
have an ed and although thats only
recently I have always cut my arms, I
never told people for the simple reason
most people I know think im the happiest
person they know, I make them laugh and im
always fun to be with, but the other side
of me stems back to the late 90s and I
thought even if I told ppl they would
laugh and never take me seriously because
of what im like, you not alone with this
and im not in denile of my self harm I can
control it mostly by taking my mind of it
with other things, but if you feel that
you can't stop or cut more often speak to
a gp and more importantly family who will
be happy to help, its nothing to be
ashamed of and the family is probably the
only real people you can trust with it, so
don't be afraid to do it, even if you
think its not a problem and you feel
normal most of the time
there is always people to speak to anytime
of the day :d
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mxgurlie101
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Dec 2005 Posts: 92 Location: maryland
Talk to Me Anyone If You Need to Posted: 03-08-06 19:29pm
Ive been a cutter for about 3 yrs now and
had an ed for 7 so I know a lot of ways to
help with all the treatment centers ive
been to just email me anytime at mxgurlie
101@aol.Com
hope you dont feel like a freak anymore
b/c your not alone many ppl have the same
problems just as you just ask round
they'll help you
im always here sarah :)
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 03-08-06 19:55pm
See so you are not alone and you are not a
freak! Talk to your family or your
school couselor or maental health, please,
do not take me wrong, I am not trying to
tell you that you are crazy, it is just
that you might need some help and there is
nothing to be ashamed of, we all need a
little help sometime in our lives. When
you throw up(sp) like that you are
injuring your stomach, esophagus, bones,
you could end up with arthritis or worse
and it effects your system and your mind,
you can kill yourself or end up as an
invalid and you do not want that, you
would be hurting those that care about you
and love you. You even have people to
talk to here that care! So please find
help and know that we are here for you!
I wish you the best!
Please let us know how you are doing!
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rioliverpool
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Feb 2006 Posts: 10 Location: liverpool
Thanxs Guys Posted: 04-21-06 05:33am
:? Hey
sorry I havent replied till now.
It comforts me to know im not the only one
going through this.
Recently I have been able to control my
purging but find myself eating only one
cuppa soup daily. I have no disire for
food lost my appetite and self harm
regulary.
Everyone I know thinks im fat they dont
say it but you can see it in there
faces.
Is it possible that im losing weight but
dont look it coz all my pants are big on
the waste? The weirdest thing is this
makes me want to lose more weight and more
and more.
Peeps are starting to klick all is not
right but I continue to deny.
Xxxxx
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 724
Thanks: 0
Thanked:4
Re: Your Not the Only One!!! Posted: 04-21-06 06:24am
pepi85
wrote:
i never told people for the
simple reason most people I know think im
the happiest person they know, I make them
laugh and im always fun to be with (...)
you not alone with this and im not in
denile of my self harm. I can control it
mostly by taking my mind of it with other
things, but if you feel that you can't
stop or cut more often speak to a gp and
more importantly family (...)
there is always people to speak to anytime
of the day :d
talking to your family may be very hard.
Sometimes they just can see what's in
front of their faces and won't believe in
you. That's what i'm affraid of and also
ashamed, because I feel like I can't count
on them and I don't want to try and see
what would happen if they knew it all.
Perhaps they'd understand, but I don't
believe in so, so I just don't want to try
- if I tryed and it went the worst way, I
would be in a deep depression like i've
been before and they didn't support me
then - they saw no reasons for me to feel
like trash.
sandyallen
wrote:
see so you are not alone and
you are not a freak! (...)
you might need some help and there is
nothing to be ashamed of, we all need a
little help sometime in our lives. (...)
you can kill yourself or end up as an
invalid and you do not want that, you
would be hurting those that care about you
and love you. You even have people to
talk to here that care! So please find
help and know that we are here for
you!
you see, throwing up was hurting my
esophagus and my stomach, but it could
have been a lot worse if I hadn't gone to
the doctor and got help. I went first to
the nutritionist and then to the
psychologist and I also could have gone to
the psychiatrist, but it still hasn't gone
too far. It's important for you to talk
to someone - talking to us may help you,
we know and we want to help you and be
helped by other people, but we are not the
closest people you have: friends, family -
and we are not doctors either. If you
don't want to talk to your parents now,
you can still go to the doctor by yourself
or with a friend. I started going by
myself, but i'm considering going with
someone on the next time (the next
appointment I have is may 3rd). Take baby
steps and you'll manage to get good in a
good way.
And, of course, talk to us as much as you
wish and can, because we are here to hear
you and to support you everytime.
rioliverpool
wrote:
it comforts me to know im
not the only one going through this.
Recently I have been able to control my
purging but find myself eating only one
cuppa soup daily. I have no desire for
food lost my appetite and self harm
regularly. (...)
is it possible that im losing weight but
dont look it coz all my pants are big on
the waste? The weirdest thing is this
makes me want to lose more weight and more
and more.
yeah, you're not the only one, no, no, no,
you will have to hear us too! ;)
it's great that you are managing to
control your purging, have you managed to
have any "zero day"? But you are still
eating to few. You need to feed your
body, because you need nourishment to live
and do the stuff you have to! It's hard,
and i'm also trying to re-educate myself
about that, but you have to have more than
just one lousy meal a day and also try not
to skip meals. I must say that i'm trying
to do it correctly, but I still skip lunch
many times and have poor meals during the
day (generally only two meals: breakfast
and dinner).
I also hate to buy clothes, because I feel
very fat and ugly... :\ but I hope that
feeling goes away sometime...
