My husband and I have been married for 3
years. He was diagnosed as being
bipolar many years before we met. He
responds very well to his medication and
his mood is always pretty stable. He is
an exceptionally kind, intelligent, and
very likable person. Despite all of
these positive things, I am unhappy in my
marriage to him. For the entire 3 years
of our marriage, he hasn't worked. I
think his medication makes it hard for him
to get out of bed. This is very
frustrating for me. I am in dental
school full-time and I have to work also.
Because of school, I can't work enough
to pay all of our obligations so we mostly
live off of student loans. It is
frustrating to come home from work and/or
school and then have to clean the house
and cook (if we don't eat out or take
out)...He is usually still in bed by the
time I come home from school/work. He
also takes naps frequently during the day.
We don't do much of anything that other
young couples might do for fun (i am 25
years old) except go to the movies or
dinner. I really do love him very much
but every day I can't see going another
day married to him. I regret marrying
him frequently. I have felt this way
for a long time but I repress my true
feelings because I took a vow to be with
him through sickness and also because his
condition isn't at all his fault. In
the meantime, I am racked with guilt
because I find myself thinking of the
future without him. I also feel guilty
because when classmates or other people
ask what my husband does for a living, I
name a job/place that he worked for years
ago. The thought of hurting him kills
me, but I can't go on much longer-i'm
simply tired.
Advice please from anyone else who is/was
married (whether you are married to a
person with bipolar disorder or you are
the spouse with bd) and dealing with
issues arising from bd. Did you find
ways to cope? I am particularly
interested in hearing from other women
married to bipolar men.
