Is Love Enough? Am I the Only One Who Values Punctuality? Posted: 02-20-06 13:21pm
After 4 amazing months together, I broke
up with my boyfriend. He was in many
wyas the most amazing man I have ever been
with... Kind, calm, caring and
affectionate. There were a few things
that I didn't like, though... He has a
tendency to be late (at least 1-2 times a
week). Not just accidentally, but
because he wants to spend a few more
minutes doing something else (i.E.
Getting his cell phone fixed, or playing
with his niece.) I am 19 and he is 34.
He was late to see me yesterday by 45
minutes. He called and pushed the time
we were meeting back twice. It made me
so angry, I broke up with him when he got
there. I had told him that punctuality
was very important to me the first time he
was late (ever), and he promised to
change. I think i'm figuring out that
people don't really change.
I really do love him, but I (logically)
feel that the cons of our relationship are
outweighing the pros (at least for me.)
one part of me thinks that I will be
better off with a punctual man who is my
own age, but another part of me thinks
that I may have lost the love of my life.
So, is love enough?
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nightangel73
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Nov 2005 Posts: 2323 Location: North Carolina
Thanks: 7
Thanked:0
Posted: 02-20-06 19:51pm
Anaconda wow I think you are exagerating
with your punctuality standards. That is
too much!! I don't think you will ever
find a man that is so punctual ever.
And you break just because he came late by
45 minutes?? That is crazy girl. Lol if
it were for that my bf would already break
up with me cause I can't be on time for
anything hehehe
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Jennifer23
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Oct 2005 Posts: 76 Location: Texas
Posted: 02-20-06 21:11pm
Well, if you love a person that deeply,
you will take him with his flaws (to some
extent). If you think about it, people
have far worse things than their man not
being punctual. Women are gettin' beat
by there boyfriends/husbands and they're
still there, right by their side. True
... Some are just too scared to leave,
but if you ask one of them ... They will
say they stay because they love the health
questions!
Now ... I can relate to you. I've been
with my man for about 5 years (i'm 23,
he's 35). He has always been late.
When he says he's gonna be here in 10
minutes, it usually means 45 minutes. It
use to bother me at first, but i've
adjusted to it. It's like, he'll call to
have me make something for lunch and says
he'll be here in 15 minutes. I don't
start making lunch until about 30-45
minutes later because I know how late he
is. But ... When he's actually on time,
i'll let him know that i'm so use to him
being late that I figured today wouldn't
be any different and so he has to wait on
me. You see ... He gets a taste of his
own medicine!!
So, in my opinion, breaking up with the
possible "love of your life" just because
he isn't as punctual as you would like him
to be was pretty stupid! I think you
have a call you need to make ......
Good luck!
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Lalee
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Jan 2006 Posts: 991 Location: South Carolina
Posted: 02-21-06 12:38pm
I feel like there's something more going
on here that you're not telling us.
Because, if you love him like you say you
love him, the punctuality thing would be
an annoyance but not a deal breaker.
My boyfriend is late all the time, but I
love him so much that it doesn't really
matter... It's not like I think I don't
have faults of my own.
And it's not like he's blowing you off to
have another drink with his buddies or get
some girl's phone number. He's playing
with his neice, for god's sake... And he
calls you to tell you he'll be late.
Maybe i"m missing something (or, again,
you're just not telling us something), but
that seems pretty considerate to me.
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rdy4one
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Oct 2005 Posts: 45 Location: Chicago
Posted: 02-21-06 12:49pm
Well in your situation I don't see how the
cons are outweighing the pro's. If you
say he is so amazing and you love him, you
are willing to give all of that up because
he is 45 mins late. Which would you
prefer an abusive, non-caring man that is
always on time or a loving, caring,
supporting man that is later here or
there. You are 19 and you have a long
way to go, there is no perfect person out
there and everyone has a flaw including
you and i. Maybe you need to learn what
love really is first.
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