Ive been with this girl for a year and 4
minths, around dec of this yea she tole me
that she needed a brek cuz she felt
stressed out and pressured to ss me every
night,after a month the break was over but
I felt it was down to me and not her, cuz
I didnt realy give her anyspace I was so
depressed I just kept calling her saying I
luv u n stuff, expecting to hear the majic
words, anyway this past four months she
has never been the same, and I argue with
her cuz she is so distant, now I realise I
was being to demanding and pressuring her,
eventually after I said do you just wana
break up(i didnt realy I was judt wanting
to see how she feels like normal) she
broke it off, she said she had enough of
the moaning and huffing, I have just added
to much pressure, I am so depressed and
lost right now, and I dont no what to do.
She said to give her a few weeks then see
how she feels, but I fear that over that
seperation she will grow futher away, I
have promised her id change and wuldnt
argue with her no more, but she says she
just dosent want it, I think theres alot
of pressure there allready with her exams
and stuff coming up cause she always wants
to do her best, so I think there was to
much weight at that time to carry, she
said she dsnt love me nomore and that she
is sick of me and the fighting, that she
actually dreaded going to see me, cuz she
new I would always fight,,
bassically the reason I did fight was
becuz I never seen her and never really
new where I stood, so it just added stress
to me,
now I am so heart broken, and I dont no
what to do to get her back, I fear that if
I stay away for a while she will just
dissaper, but if I harrass her she will
move futher away. I dnt no, at this
moment (2days after the break up) she is
so happy, her best friend told me, but her
mum said to me she is just confused and
needs the space, build a friendship again,
but I just dont no. What shuld I do?
|
Spirit
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006 Posts: 387 Location: Canada
Posted: 04-01-06 06:48am
When a man or a woman says, "i need time
off to think", it's probably not a good
sign. I've said it before and I meant it.
It means your stressing her out, and
instead of alleivating her stress, your
adding to it.
Not to say the relationship is over, but
it is absolutely necessary that you give
her "the time off". Pressuring, calling,
emailing will just push her further away.
To me, at least, a needy and depressed
person will add nothing to a relationship.
And if that person keeps calling it
starts to make me fear for my life and
question that persons sanity.
If this relationship doesn't work....So be
it....Fix yourself...And move on. :)
|
ryan1987
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Mar 2006 Posts: 11
Yea, Posted: 04-01-06 10:47am
Ok so do you think that if I just leave
her be, she could heal and then want to
get back, I just dont no what to do, is
there anyway I could show her we are still
in love but she just dont no it now, like
make her have a moment or something where
she realizes shes still in love and stuff,
I want to be affectionate and show her I
love her, but I dont want her to disappear
completely, I spoke to her earlier and she
was saying at this moment in time I dont
want to get back and I dont no if I ever
will, just wait and see,, I was speaking
to her best friend and she said that its
doing her head in you acting like yous are
still together and stuff, her friend says
she thinks now she is over you, but her
mum said to me she thinks that all the
pressure shes under is clouding her mind,
she says shes probly happy use are broken
up now because the relief of the pressure
and stress being lifted, and that in a few
weeks it could die down, but I duno, I
just really want to no what to do.
:cry:
(pressure from exams, and when we were
together the last few months I kept asking
to see her and argued alot like everyday
we spoke ,cuz I didnt feel luved n stuff,
so I kept pushing her away,)
|
Spirit
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006 Posts: 387 Location: Canada
Posted: 04-02-06 06:35am
I'd give her the few weeks she requested,
and then from there start slowly and see
what happens. I received a simple note
from my beau, and all it said was "i love
you, babes!!!"....That was 5 years ago,
and I still have it.
The turn-out will all depend on whether
she reciprocates your feelings, and take
care not to over do it, as simple things
like that can be misunderstood as stalking
behaviour.
Cut out the "middle-men", ie the friend
and mother(they're just giving you
confusing and conflicting information
anyway), and go directly to the ex
girlfriend. Plan a meeting, don't argue,
talk maturely and respectfully and see if
you can both come to an understanding.
And don't worry if the relationship is
over.....My first love left me in tears
also......Now I wouldn't even recognize
him if he walked past me on the street.
:)
|
ryan1987
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Mar 2006 Posts: 11
Posted: 04-02-06 13:46pm
Thanks, has anyones experienced this with
there own boyfriend, if so what could he
have done to save it?, :roll:
|
ryan1987
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Mar 2006 Posts: 11
Posted: 04-05-06 10:18am
ryan1987
wrote:
thanks, has anyones
experienced this with there own boyfriend,
if so what could he have done to save it?,
:roll:
plz guysssssss
|
Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 04-07-06 10:27am
He shouldn't be all up my a$$ and always
.A.L.W.A.Y.S wanting to be with me and
asking me if everything is ok,and whats
wrong. . .It's fine sometimes but after
a while it gets real old.He should have
just taken a chill pill!
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