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HcoBrunette06

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Friend Drinking And Doing Drugs While Pregnant
Posted: 04-18-06 16:19pm

One of my friends is about 4 1/2 months pregnant, and she smokes a lot! She still gets drunk, and the other night she was "going" to do drugs, until my other friends yelled at her for it.

It just makes me mad because she always says "oh yeah im gonna be a good mom, im such a good mom blah blah blah" but she neglects her baby already, and he or she isn't even here yet! Shes around weed all the time, seriously smokes like a pack of cigaretts a day, gets drunk off her ass quite a bit, and has done extecy (sp?) and shrooms and some others. It makes me so upset, because that baby has potential, just like everyone else does, and that baby is going to be the one to suffer for her stupid mistakes!

I was thinking today, and I was wondering if I should write down a whole bunch of things, like effects that drinking and smoking and drugs could have on the baby, and give it to her and have her read them and maybe that would give her a reality check. I'm so tired of hearing about her doing things like this, and her not listening to me when I say it'll hurt her baby.

Any ideas? Besides call cps, which if she doesn't get ahold of herself .I .A.M planning on doing.

Thanks :)
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Nataliachick7

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Posted: 04-18-06 16:44pm

People like this really piss me off. Like if I knew I her I would seriously b*tch smack her. I think that list is a good idea. You can also tell her that she has a good chance of having a retarded/developmentally delayed child-the first trimester is the most critical time during a pregnancy, and she effed it up big time. And she needs to know that just because a baby is born with 10 fingers and 10 toes doesnt mean it doesnt have severe brain damage. This girl is a freaking immature fool and I truly feel sorry for that baby.
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hunterjumper

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Posted: 04-18-06 19:02pm

I think it's a good idea to give her some information, but also tell her it because she's likely to just turn around and throw out anything you print off for her before she even reads it...Once your back is turned.

If she's smoking that much, her baby is in a huge risk of being born premature. She probably won't think that's very serious, but nicu is very serious and could potentially mean death or having a baby with downs or autism or other mental or physical disablility from being born so early. Many preemies are deaf or blind because of it. It also costs a lot more and her insurance may not cover all of it. It's likely her baby will also have asthsma and need an inhaler, costing more money and drastically affecting it's life forever. My friend's smoked way less, only a few times a week and a couple of their babies still needed inhalers at like 4 months old. Very sad.

Alcohol during pregnancy of course leads to fetal alcohol syndrome, which is very serious. It can mimic many of the same symptoms as something like adhd, with kids who can't focus in school. They act off, they get in fights, they get bad grades, they're more likely to drop out. They're more likely to do criminal acts because of their out of control behavior. They have a very very hard time even getting a job, let alone keeping it. Nothing advanced either. Most people with fas can't even keep a job like unloading trucks or stocking shelves. They rarely have successful relationships and they grow up pretty damn lonely and miserable.

Doing drugs, especially early on, can really harm the development of the organs and the brain. She may very well have caused her baby to be deformed. At the very least, she's depriving it of oxygen and nutrients and is likely to have an addicted baby who has to detox in nicu. Which means that cps will likely step in and take the baby away.


So basically tell her that she's going to lose the baby one way or the other if she doesn't get her act straight. The nurses will get involved and the doctors will get involved and lastly, you'll call cps yourself if she doesn't straight up because you're not one to suffer fools and child abuse lightly. And that's what it is.
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Cambion

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Posted: 04-18-06 19:30pm

Perhaps losing the child will need to be the lesson hard learned to make her clean up her act. If the child does survive, it will be plagued with an array of problems ranging from fetal alcohol syndrome to being addicted to the drugs the mother used during the pregnancy. If she's going to be abusing the child when it's still in her body, then she needs to seriously consider either abortion or adoption. Maybe nature will take its course and she'll miscarry before birthing a deformed, drug-addicted baby.

I'm sure she's aware of the risk she is putting her child in by drinking and doing drugs, but I would venture far enough to say that she doesn't care. She does not have the makings of a good, or even decent mother, and I pray this child does not end up in her care at any costs.
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seksiHily

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Posted: 04-18-06 20:08pm

Or the child could turn out jsut fine and she learns nothing...
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HcoBrunette06

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Posted: 04-18-06 20:15pm

I know the child could turn out just fine, but thats not a chance that I want to take ya know? It's doing it stupid that she can't stay away from drugs and alcohol for 9 months, long enough to have a healthy baby. I just want to smack her sometimes!

She always says "god I can't wait til I have this kid, i'm going out and getting messed up!"

um ok if you have a kid you aren't worried about going out and getting drunk and high, that shows you right there that she isn't ready. :roll:
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Rawrrr

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Posted: 04-18-06 20:57pm

That sucks. Why would someone choose to do that to their baby. I admit I was drinking and smoking pot but I didnt know I was pregnent and I wish I did. Well now that I know i'm pregnent I stopped smoking and drinking. Whatever, people are going to do what they want to do reguardless of what other people say. She is enjoying life and not realizing the harm she is doing to her unborn child. If her kid comes out all messed up she will know why and hate herself. Not to be rude but I hope she gets some kind of lesson out of this. Yea maybe you should write the affects down and get pictures and then give it to her and maybe she will realize how messed up her baby can turn out and she will stop being retarded.
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HcoBrunette06

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Posted: 04-18-06 21:07pm

Yeah I really think im going to do that, like print out pics of premature babies and write down what can happen. I just don't like seeing someone hurt a child like that. And I dont think id be a very good friend if I just let her keep doing it.

Thanks guys :)
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seksiHily

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Posted: 04-18-06 21:42pm

Oh yeah I agree its not a risk to medical question around wiht like she seems to be, but she may learn nothing from this, maybe cps can step in before the birth? Wont hurt to call and ask
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*~Bree~*

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Posted: 04-18-06 22:46pm

I started crying reading this. My ex best friend of 9 years did the same thing. And her baby is handicap(s/p). She's 4 years old and can't even tell her mommy she loves her. Can you imagine your 4 year old screaming and crying and not having a clue in the world as to whats wrong. Here's the story:

at age 14 she found out she was pregnant....You'd think she'd tell someone well im the only one that knew. She drank, smoked, took extacy, all kinds of pills, acid, you name it she prolly tried it. I think to get rid of the baby but she was so far along the baby had already developed a good bit. Well after her belly started showing her parents figured it out and she had the baby a few weeks later.

2 months early at only 2lbs 9 oz. Destiny ann!!! She stayed in the hospital for seems like the first year of her life. She looked like a perfect baby maybe a little small but thats it.

Years went on and her development never really kicked in. She never really crawled, ate or drank by herself, talked, laughed, anything. She pretty much just layed there and cried.

Now at four she can walk a little. She still can't talk. She screams for no reason and crys all the time. It's hard. I mean I love this little girl to dealth but I don't talk to them anymore because my friend never changed. She still parties and lets she grandmaw take care of the baby. It just kills me being I can't even conceive. You need to tell your friend to chill the f*ck out and get her head straight because the chances of her having a normal baby are very slim.

People like that need to have their kids taken away from them. Their are people out here that will take a child even with problems. God bless this child!!!!!!!!!
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HcoBrunette06

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Posted: 04-18-06 22:58pm

Well now im crying lol

i'd like to take her in a room with like teachers permission or whatever and just talk to her, she says she loves the baby and that since she heard the heartbeat it gave her a reality check but she keeps drinking and that same day she was going to do more drugs. Its such a big deal to me, and obviously everyone here I just wish she could understand. I dont know what to say to her. Nobody else will take the time or effort to sit her down and talk to her, she should do this on her own but she really doesn't have anyone, she stays at a different persons house every single night because her mom just lets her do whatever so I think thats why shes like this. But its still no excuse to hurt her baby like this.

I just wish I could take it and run lol id love it.

Its just the fact that he or she will have to suffer because of stevies stupid mistakes. Its not fair
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Nadine2006

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Posted: 04-19-06 04:14am

She is being effin stupid.. She going to hurt a poor little innocent baby to wat be cool? Yeh she is achieving so much... You need to have a good talk to her.. Otherwise she not just going to ruien the babies life hers also.. Wen she wil have to look after a baby who has sum sort of disability.. Im sure she will be happy with her choices by trying to be cool..
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DylanJacob

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Joined: 17 Apr 2006
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Posted: 04-19-06 04:50am

Yeah - write a list... If ya need help we are here to be "researchers".

People like that really annoy me, especially after dil.
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Nadine2006

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Posted: 04-19-06 04:52am

Yeh ...Really annoys me cause I watch a friend do this and now the kid has adhd and lots of other problems and she always complains and she wonders why!!! Effin fool
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HcoBrunette06

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Posted: 04-19-06 07:24am

Well i've got school today, and when I get home im gonna make a list. If you want to help you can, I don't really know what to look up right now lol but thanks for the help guys :)
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DylanJacob

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Posted: 04-19-06 07:45am

Just type in smoking pregnancy in google and I bet itll come up with a million things - hang on ill check it. Im bored at home
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DylanJacob

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Posted: 04-19-06 07:48am

Smoking nearly doubles a woman's risk of having a low-birthweight baby. In 2002, 12.2 percent of babies born to smokers in the united states were of low birthweight (less than 5 pounds), compared to 7.5 percent of babies of nonsmokers.2 low birthweight can result from poor growth before birth, preterm delivery or a combination of both. Smoking has long been known to slow fetal growth. Studies also suggest that smoking increases the risk of preterm delivery 37 weeks of gestation). Premature and low-birthweight babies face an increased risk of serious health problems during the newborn period, chronic lifelong disabilities (such as cerebral palsy, mental retardation and learning problems) and even death.

The more a pregnant woman smokes, the greater the risk to her baby. However, if a woman stops smoking by the end of her first trimester of pregnancy, she is no more likely to have a low-birthweight baby than a woman who never smoked. Even if a woman has not been able to stop smoking in her first or second trimester, stopping during the third trimester can still improve her baby's growth.

Smoking has been associated with a number of pregnancy complications. Smoking cigarettes appears to double a woman's risk of developing placental problems. 1 these include placenta previa (low-lying placenta that covers part or all of the opening of the uterus) and placental abruption (in which the placenta peels away, partially or almost completely, from the uterine wall before delivery). Both can result in heavy bleeding during delivery that can endanger mother and baby, although a cesarean delivery can prevent most deaths. Placental problems contribute to the slightly increased risk of stillbirth that is associated with smoking.

Smoking in pregnancy also appears to increase a woman's risk of premature rupture of the membranes (prom) (when the sac inside the uterus that holds the baby breaks before labor begins).1 a woman with prom may experience a trickle or gush of fluid from her vagina when her water breaks. Usually, she will go into labor within a few hours. When prom occurs before 37 weeks of pregnancy it is called preterm prom, and it often results in the birth of a premature baby.
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HcoBrunette06

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Posted: 04-19-06 07:53am

Wow, thanks. You're so great :d

i hope this helps her.


We even talk about smoking to her like, "you shouldn't smoke blah blah blah" and she says "well iv known a lot of girls who smoke during pregnancy and their kids are just fine" so I guess she uses that as a crutch. She doesn't think anything can happen to her I guess.
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DylanJacob

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Posted: 04-19-06 08:11am

You're welcome :d

i would just hate to see anything happen to the baby.
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Melissa_20

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Posted: 04-19-06 09:12am

Your friend is the biggest health question! I would call the police station and ask them if there is anything they can do like step in especially when she is under age doing all of this. . .
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