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Jessicat112
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Dec 2005
Posts: 1
Location: Sheverport.La
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Cuts
Posted: 05-03-06 20:26pm
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I used to cut myself all the time. I
never would cut deep enough to kill myslef
just to feel a really bad pain. I
really dont know why I do it all I know
is that when I hurt it always seems to
come to me cutting ,myslef what is wrong
with me honestly. I also feel like I
dont really need to hide them. I used to
but then I stopped. I think that im goin
back to it though because now I want to
get back with my x an none likes him an my
family well im goin to have to keep it
from my family because he isnt the same
race. Why do u think I cut? :?:
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arcadia
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 May 2006
Posts: 4468
Location: Illinois,
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
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Posted: 05-07-06 03:49am
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I'm not sure what posesses people to
cut.
For some, I think it's because they feel
so low about themselves that they think
they deserve the pain they are
inflicting on themselves. For other it
may be the fact that self-inflicting pain
may be a sort of release.
I used to cut. Very, very stupid idea.
It can leave you with such
embarassing scars when you get older.
&can even have long term consequences.
I used to cut my fingers- around my
fingernails, &as a result of the
constant wounds, I developed a permanant
fungal infection on all of my fingers
around the nails. The only way to keep it
away is to take an antibiodic every single
day of the rest of my life. Otherwise it
will keep coming back.
It isn't worth it.
Put your strife into more productive
"art."
writing is a really good way to release
all those pent up feelings.
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AvatarOfUrDreams
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 May 2006
Posts: 67
Location: Chicago
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25 Years Old And Still Self Injuring...
Posted: 05-10-06 22:25pm
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I was told that this compulsion would
taper off after about 22 years old but
that is a load of crap.
I don't cut, I burn. I have this whole
situation that happens when I do it too:
i get really upset
i go have a smoke
i blow the cherry so it is pointy and red
i put it out on the inside of my wrist.
I have no idea why I need to do this!
I only know that it happens when the
stress, anger, or sadness gets too much to
handle. If I do it at the right moment I
can avoide panic attacks.
My father is very upset that I do it but
he isn't helping the reasons I do it.
I don't know...I'm frazzled tonight...
I will post more later but be
aware...There are lots of us out there and
none of us know why we do what we do...
Night!
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cyn
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Nov 2005
Posts: 87
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...o.o
Posted: 05-16-06 11:51am
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I wonder the same thing! I shouldnt want
to I know its considered wrong...But when
I do it ( no joke ) I feel a type of
orgasm...Not sexually. But throghtout my
body...I shudder at what it does to me. I
really dont understand it sence I dont
like blood...I get faint except when I
feel the need or desire to cut...It also
gives me a sence of power when I take a
bath and the water is almost unbarable at
first contact.Then later on I feel
guiltly...And wish I could go back. But
of course you cant go back... I hope I
can as well as all of you get over this I
feel childish when I want it now...
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w0rldd0minat0r
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Feb 2006
Posts: 238
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Posted: 06-08-06 11:32am
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Well what ive read is that cutting is to
do with impulses
cutting does these things for you...
1: allows you to show the feelings inside
in a way that you and others can see
2: releases impulses from your brain to
tackle the pain which in the end gives u
that uplifting feel afterwards
3: some people do it as a way of releasing
built up tension that your not sure how to
get rid of the stuff thats boiling up
inside so you take it out on yourself and
often the sight of blood helps this
....I wrote a post to someone before about
cutting im gonna try and search the forums
for it... (its ways of helping to do
stuff less damaging instead of cutting
when I gave up in the middle of my severe
depression and it really works...
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w0rldd0minat0r
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Feb 2006
Posts: 238
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Re: ...o.o
Posted: 06-08-06 11:34am
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wrote: | | i wonder the same thing!
I shouldnt want to I know its considered
wrong...But when I do it ( no joke ) I
feel a type of orgasm...Not sexually.
But throghtout my body...I shudder at what
it does to me. I really dont understand
it sence I dont like blood...I get faint
except when I feel the need or desire to
cut...It also gives me a sence of power
when I take a bath and the water is almost
unbarable at first contact.Then later on I
feel guiltly...And wish I could go back.
But of course you cant go back... I
hope I can as well as all of you get over
this I feel childish when I want it
now... |
i couldnt have put it better tbh.... You
feel it rushing through you I miss it now
that you talk about it like that... And
yes there was always a guiltyness about
having done it which helped me stop but I
had no feelings that I had to hide it from
the world because "it was socially
unacceptable..." as to the guilt I have
no guilt that other people thinks its
wrong and we shouldnt cut because its bad
for us... It can help you not go to that
point where u feel completely hopeless
just like smoking does for me now (brb
finding the post)
Last edited by w0rldd0minat0r on 06-08-06 11:42am; edited 1 time in total
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w0rldd0minat0r
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Feb 2006
Posts: 238
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Posted: 06-08-06 11:40am
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Found it :d
if u do want to give up then here are some
tips from when I did
1) instead of cutting use ice on wherever
u normally cut and hold it there it
can hurt more then cutting and it will
have the same affect as cutting but it
wont scar u. --- as in the same
impulses as cyn said "the orgasm" :p
2) think about the consequences of cutting
if ever u do give up I have been close to
relapsing back into cutting and u just
have to say to urself thats what u might
feel like doing but u have stopped for a
long time and u'll feel better later
3) when I said about showing people about
ur feelings by cutting it may be helpful
to write a diary with ur feelings just
quick stuff off the top of ur head it
doesnt have to be poems but sometimes they
may help
send me a personal message if u do decide
to give up and ill give u support as u go.
Or if u just need someone to relay your
feelings too im going thru the same things
as u
i have been through this and was also bad
at one stage in my life good luck with
trying to give up and if u dont want to
then its not so bad
take care
gavin, 16
also cbt or cognitive behavioural therapy
can help you sort out the way you deal
with feeling down it helped me to stop
cutting ask your doctor.
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w0rldd0minat0r
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Feb 2006
Posts: 238
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luvkittykats
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Aug 2005
Posts: 69
Location: north carolina
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rosejackson
Supporter
Joined: 23 Dec 2005
Posts: 4327
Location: hertfordshire, england
Thanks: 3
Thanked:7
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Posted: 07-18-06 11:59am
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Most people cut for the need to be in
control of something. Its the same with
eating disorders. I had both while in
school. I regret it now as its left me
with such embarassing scars on my arms and
wrists. But its a constant reminder of
how low I was and that there's better ways
of dealing with your emotions than taking
it out on yourself
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dead little me
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Sep 2006
Posts: 40
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Posted: 09-14-06 04:16am
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I cut or used to. I stopped with the help
of my ex boyfriend.
I guess I did it because I felt that no
one would understand what I was feeling
and because I could not talk to any one.
I also felt like a cut would take away
some of the pain that I was feeling by
giving me physical pain.
I cut when I felt low and when I got
angry. I held things inside and the only
way that I relieved it was to cut myself.
I am not proud of what I did but then im
not ashamed because I have learnt to over
come it. I hope that you find the
strength to find out why you do because
there is a reason and I hope that you find
the strength to stop too.
Im here if you need to chat.
Xxx lv ej
my hotmail is deadgirlwalkin@hotmail.Co.Uk if you
ever need some one
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nineinchnails277
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Posts: 58
Location: texas
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Posted: 09-14-06 14:55pm
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I dont mean to post on every forum, but I
have the same problems.
But when i'm really pissed or sad, I dont
feel the pain.
Im sorry if im being an a$$ posting
everywhere.
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jessfanem
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Posts: 27
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Posted: 10-30-06 13:57pm
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| rosejackson
wrote: | | most people cut for the need
to be in control of something. Its the
same with eating disorders. I had both
while in school. I regret it now as its
left me with such embarassing scars on my
arms and wrists. But its a constant
reminder of how low I was and that there's
better ways of dealing with your emotions
than taking it out on
yourself |
i cut and restrict food in order to
control my life right now. I always feel
out of control of the people around me and
my own life and I feel like I control
these parts of my life even though they
are negative. I am talking on another
thread about hobbies. I feel like I do
this b/c I don't have hobbies that I
control...It makes me feel crazy. Do
others that do this have hobbies?
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Mommy35
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Sep 2006
Posts: 3165
Location: Vacationland, USA,
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Posted: 10-30-06 14:07pm
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You have to want to stop and just like
kicking any habit, it's going to take
willpower.
I have heard of using ice. Submerge your
hand/arm or whatever you cut in a tub of
ice water when you get the urge. Put a
rubber band around your wrist and snap it
when you feel the urge to cut. Some
counselors recommend writing on yourself
with a red marker. I worked with a girl
that cut herself and her counselor drew a
picture of an arm and we made 100 copies
of it. She would draw on the arm instead
of cutting herself. Journaling may help
you too.
Dbt (dieletical behavior therapy works for
many people who self injure. Talking to
a professional about it can't hurt.
Good luck to you!!!
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jessfanem
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Posts: 27
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Posted: 10-30-06 14:19pm
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| mommy35
wrote: |
dbt (dieletical behavior therapy works for
many people who self injure. Talking to
a professional about it can't hurt.
Good luck to you!!! |
what is dbt I am not familiar...Thanks for
all those great ideas ---i definately
think they could help
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
Posts: 4580
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Posted: 10-30-06 14:37pm
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I am sorry that so many of you go through
this! When I worked in a hospital, I used
to see so much of it and there were a few
that almost did not make it. I used to
spend alot of my time just listening and
trying to get te parents to understand
that you are not crazy it is just that you
just need a little help sometimes.
Someone to talk to, someone that
understands, cbt is a good idea and mental
health can help and they too realize that
you are not crazy, some of you release
that way but it can be dangerous and you
need to think of the positive things in
life and realize that you have so much
more than other girls, I do understand and
we are here for you if your thoughts are
about negative things theb you need to
discuss them with someone that you can
trust!
All the best to you!
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jessfanem
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Posts: 27
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Posted: 10-30-06 14:41pm
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| sandyallen
wrote: | i am sorry that so many of
you go through this! When I worked in a
hospital, I used to see so much of it and
there were a few that almost did not make
it. I used to spend alot of my time just
listening and trying to get te parents to
understand that you are not crazy it is
just that you just need a little help
sometimes. Someone to talk to, someone
that understands, cbt is a good idea and
mental health can help and they too
realize that you are not crazy, some of
you release that way but it can be
dangerous and you need to think of the
positive things in life and realize that
you have so much more than other girls, I
do understand and we are here for you if
your thoughts are about negative things
theb you need to discuss them with someone
that you can trust!
All the best to
you! |
thank you for your encouraging words. I
do not feel crazy I feel like a baby who
wants help...What do you mean we need to
"realize...You have so much more than
other girls" are you saying that people
have worse situations and it isn't worth
hurting ourselves? Please help...I
joined this site b/c I do want help and I
need support and stories to relate too so
that I don't feel alone
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
Posts: 4580
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Posted: 10-30-06 15:01pm
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Hi there! What I meant was for esample,
look at the girls in iraq, look at some of
these girls in some of these uther foreign
countries and including some of our girls
that are beaten abused, daily raped, have
all of these diseases, drink filthy water,
eat one meal a day if they are lucky, that
is what I meant, I guess I should have
said we are more fortunate thatn
some(pardon me, sometimes I am not the
best with words, maybe that will help you
to understand more what I was trying to
say) I was not looking for a fight, I do
want to help you! Have you thought about
talking to your parents or your dr about
this or going to mental health, they may
not help you but will probably be able to
send you to someone that can and like the
other lady said cognitive behavriol(sp)
therapy(cbt) might help also. I really do
hope you can find the help you need
because I sincerely do care! I have sat
and talked for hours with patients that
has had the same problem that you have!
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jessfanem
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Posts: 27
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Posted: 10-30-06 15:09pm
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Sorry, guess I am bad at communicating on
these sites too. I didn't think you were
trying to be mean or pick a fight. I
just jumbled too many thoughts together in
my reply. You are right though and I
just got out of an inpatient clinic where
I was petitioned to by a crisis worker at
the er after getting 12 stitches do to
self injury. I tried to learn as much as
I could in the 3 days I spent at the
clinic and one of the things I focused on
was how good my life really is compared to
others instead of how bad it is compared
to people who have it better(or so I
think) you seem very knowlegable on the
subject, what did you do for a living?
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
Posts: 4580
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Posted: 10-30-06 16:05pm
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I was a nurse and a social service worker
and you are right , their are those that
do have it alot better. I am sorry of
what you had to go through, I am sure it
was not easy! I do hope you get some help
that you need and remember that we are
here for you. I am disabled now do to
alot of neurologic situations that really
bring on the pain and I am unable to walk
very well so I do understand about the
depression part because I have always
worked but I am accepting it and am moving
on because that is what I must do without
my good friends that I have had and my
animals and husband I do not know where I
would be right now but I too hve had to
help myself through it!
Allthe best to you!
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