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Lostlady
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Medical Abortion At 7 Weeks!
Posted: 05-06-06 18:07pm
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Hey,
i'm three weeks pregnant and am planning
to have an abortion at 7 weeks. Would
have it now but am doing university exams
as is the father and have to wait until
they are over.
Have been with father for almost 3 yrs on
and off and are off at the moment, I got
pregnant the day we decided the rel wasnt
working anymore! I told him about
pregnancy today and together we have
decided to have an abortion.
Has anybody had one? I have no doubt
about my decision but would like to hear
from somebody who has gone through it so I
have an idea what to expect.
Also have the added pressure of living in
acountry where abortion is illegal so have
to travel abroad to have it done. Luckily
the father is in college in the country I
am travelling to so will have the support
but the available time I have to have
abortion and travel home is limited - will
this be a huge problem??
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Carifairy
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Posted: 05-06-06 22:48pm
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There is a chance that abortion by pill
may fail, if I wa stravelling I would most
certianly have a surgical abortion because
you know it is done now.
I have had 1 medical and 2 surgical, I
wholeheartedly reccommend surgical, it can
be painless thanks to good drugs and is
over right away.
With the fact that you must travel I
would say surgical in all honesty, and
with medical you must go back for a 2 week
check up to make sure all the tissue is
gone. With a surgical you could go to
your regular doctor and have him or her
check you out.
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Lostlady
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Posted: 05-07-06 07:00am
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When I travel I will be less than 7 weeks
and all the info I have recieved has been
that medical is better than surgical this
early. Also cost is a factor, it is alot
more expensive to get surgical and I
already have to borrow the money to travel
and pay for the abortion.
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Carifairy
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Posted: 05-07-06 12:18pm
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Do what you have to do, but with a medical
you will have to have an ultrasound after
to make sure the abortion is done..About 2
weeks later you need a check-up. If there
is tissue left you will need a surgical
abortion anyways.
I am just letting you know the risks,
especially with the fact that you are
travelling.
Do you have a regular doctor who can
check you out afterwards??
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Lostlady
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Posted: 05-07-06 15:30pm
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Yeah I have my own doc here. Have to
check out tho if he's ok wiht providing
post-abortion care - some of em can be a
bit funny bout it here. Should be ok
tho.
I still have a few weeks to make up my
mind, it just seems to be the less
invasive of the two and I dunno, it's all
very confusing.
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Carifairy
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Posted: 05-07-06 15:44pm
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They are both equally safe actually.
With the abortion by pill you are having
an induced miscarriage, there will be more
bleeding with medical than surgical.
Cool definately talk with your doc and
find out if he/she will do post abortion
care. After a surgical abortion post
abortion care is not as much a necessity
as after medical.
What country do you live in?
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Lostlady
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Posted: 05-07-06 16:04pm
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Living in ireland and travelling to
england. Will be there a total of 10 days
including a few days to chill out before
and after.
The father is my best friend who I have
had a serious relationship in the past but
we are just friends now.
He's fully behind me on this which is
great and I am staying in his house for
most of the time there, my other friend is
putting me up in hotel for first two
nights and is taking me out and about to
enjoy the sites. Try to relax me.
I dont mind the bleeding but am terrified
of the surgical method.
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Carifairy
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Posted: 05-07-06 16:34pm
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Ireland.. Oh.. Yeah I do know that it is
pretty much illegal no matter what too
huh.. I am sorry you must travel so far
to get a procedure, it does'nt seem fair
to me at all.
It is very good that you are staying for
a few days after, that way you will be
close to the clinc. It iss o good that
you have people who support you!
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Lostlady
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Posted: 05-07-06 17:06pm
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Yeah, if I have one thing it's great
friends! I'm so so lucky! They are
paying for the whole thing, flights,
procedure and spending money so I can
treat myself. They are all meeting me at
the airport when I get back to look after
me.
I'm alot more positive about it today
after seeing some of them and knowing they
are there 100%.
Thanks so much for talking to me, know
nobody who's ever had an experience wiht
this so it's good to have found this site.
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Lostlady
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Joined: 06 May 2006
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Posted: 05-07-06 19:43pm
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Okay, this may make me seem a bit stupid
but I have a question.
The way I have seen on websites to work
out how many weeks into the pregnancy says
to take it from either the first day of
your last period or from ovulation etc..
Which would shorten term by 2 weeks but
gives same due date etc...
When I rang clinic for appointment they
asked about my last period, I didnt know
the exact date but roughly end or march
which would make me 5/6 weeks pregnant
according to above... Now I know I am
only three weeks pregnant because there is
only one day that I could have become
pregnant.
They will do a scan wont they? I dont
want them thinking i'm further along than
I am as that will affect treatment and
cost etc...
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Carifairy
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Posted: 05-08-06 14:48pm
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They will do a scan, so no worries about
that =)
are you going to a marie stopes hospital,
or british pregnancy advisory?
(bpas)....
All clinics I know of do do a scan
because they have to know exactly how far
along you are.
The reason I asked which clinic you are
going to is because I have heard that
b.P.A.S. Has a special considerations
for women coming over from ireland... I
think marie stopes also has some kind
special considerations as well..It was
just a thought...
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Lostlady
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Posted: 05-08-06 18:02pm
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I'm going to bpas. I looked into marie
stopes but the bpas clinic is easier to
get to from where I am staying and marie
stopes has a policy only to give surgical
procedures to irish women.
I just found bpas to be nicer all round
but thats just me. The college nurse said
they usually recommend marie stopes cos
you can fly in and out in quicker but seen
as I have 10 days to spend over there i'm
going with bpas. Think me and the father
need to spend some time together before
and after to sort things out. And I feel
I need to be close to him then seen as
he's not here now and we can only talk
on-line. Wish he was here even just to
hug me or something. Girls are doing what
they can for me but deep down think only
he can make me feel better.
I'm starting to get morning sickness I
think. Gone off dairy foods and nauseus
all day today. Could be stress either.
Very very tired too, all the time. Maybe
it's all in my head. Just want to get it
over and done with.
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Carifairy
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Posted: 05-08-06 23:11pm
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The reason they only give surgicals is
because the pill fails more often than
surgical abortion does, and if you do not
abort a pregnancy after you use the pill
it could cause severe birth defects..Or a
nasty infection from retained tissue.
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cherry88
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 May 2006
Posts: 633
Location: ,
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Posted: 05-14-06 18:40pm
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I had an medicated abortion at 9 weeks,
and it hurt like hell. Now have to deal
at the back of my mind that im a murderer,
so make sure you properly think about this
dont panic and take th easy way old. This
isnt old school britain anymore where you
need the father. There alot of single
parensta that get on just fine, my mum was
a single mother. And she had me when she
was 16, and never regretted as we r best
friends too. Well anyway when I had the
abortion it hurt like hell, no pain I have
ever imagined before, its not like a heavy
perioe its much worse in my eyes, and
uncontrollable feelin, and meds dont make
go away, not to mention the pain and long
period that remains afterwards. After u
go through and abortion it deff makes u a
stronger person. And trust u will b able
to handle any pain, if u do decide thats
the best thing, then get it done asap.
Dont leave it late cause the longer u
leave it the more its hurts. They told me
that cause 9 weeks was the deadline and I
never imagined that it wud hurt so much.
Plus I thought bpas was crap, I mean the
talking side of things, when I first went
there they said I had no choice and had to
get rid of it.And if the dad didnt want it
I have no right to keep it. And that aint
good advice. Well good luck.
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Lostlady
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 May 2006
Posts: 20
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Posted: 05-14-06 19:45pm
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Cherry,
i know it is possible to be a single
parent but thats not what I want. I
'need' the father involved in this because
we have been best friends for years and
have had a very serious relationship with
eachother for nearly three years. He
supports me in every decision I make in my
life not just this one. I made the
decision to have the abortion knowing the
facts 100% and have thought very long and
hard about since I found out I was
pregnant. If I had decided to continue
witht he pregnancy he would have supported
me in that too.
I have talked to bpas loads over the phone
as there is alot to arrange because I have
to travel and only have 10 days in which I
can travel between finishing exams and
starting work. I will have to abortion
when I am 9 weeks and have changed to
having surgical suction as it is quicker
and I will be borderline on the medical
one anyway. I found them to be great and
have made every effort to arrange things
around my timing and situation.
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Carifairy
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Posted: 05-14-06 20:28pm
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Oh great, I am so glad bpas has been good
to you!!! I have heard a lot of good
things about them.
You gotta do whats right for you!! Yes
anyone can be a single parent, but that is
a choice, just like abortion is a choice
too!
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cherry88
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 May 2006
Posts: 633
Location: ,
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Posted: 05-15-06 06:52am
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Well im glad that you have someone there
for you all the way and he happens to be
baby daddy. Well I hope you make the
right choice for you and your babies
future. And good luck I hope things go
well. Its nice to have someone there for
you at this time of need, and u said he
was ur best friend too.Nice.
Oh and by the way that was my opinion on
bpas carifairy, I dnt no if u wrk for them
or something, but their advice to me was
shoddy, maybe cause it was the one I went
to.And where I come from, everythings
shoddy the hospital, buses
everything...But other than that they were
professional.The end. Good luck again
lostlady. Keep us posted. X
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