>>men - very funny
>>this was written by a guy... It's pretty damn smart.
>>girls--have a sense of humor!
>>
>>i never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and
>>women
>>differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole venus and mars
>>thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and
women
>>with
>>their heart.
>>
>>for example: one evening last week, my girlfriend and I were
>>getting into bed.
>>
>>well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "i
>>don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
>>
>>i said "what??!! What was that?!"
>>
>>so she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet
>>
>>dreads to hear...
>>”you're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
>>enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." she responded
to
>>my
>>puzzled look by saying, "can't you just love me for who I am and not
what
>>i do
>>for you in the bedroom?"
>>
>>realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to
>>sleep.
>>
>>the very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend
>>time with her. We went out to a nice
>>lunch and then went shopping at a
>>big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she
>>tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't
decide
>>which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted
new
>>shoes
>>to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair
>>for each
>>outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where
>>she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...She was
so
>>excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I
>>started to think she was testing
>>me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know
how
>>to
>>play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said,
>>"that's fine, honey."
>>
>>she was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
>>excitement.
>>smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "i think this
>>is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
>>
>>i could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "no honey, i
>>don't feel like it."
>>
>>her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a
>>baffled what?"
>>
>>i then said "honey! I just want you to hold this stuff for a
>>while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a
>>man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." and
just
>>when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "why
can't
>>you just love me for
>>who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
>>
>>apparently i'm not having sex tonight either....But at least that
>>health forum knows i'm smarter than her.