I Just Broke Up With My Bipolar Boyfriend

The last few days have been high drama. We had gotten back together this past january and were spending every other weekend together (he was living about 4 hours away in the outer banks). I've known him for about 8 years and we've had an off and on tumultuous relationships throughout that time. When he contacted me last november, we hadn't spoken in two years. I was terrified to engage in conversation with him so I pushed him away. He then told me in january that he was leaving la and moving to the outer banks where his family lives. He finally "got me" when he said he wasn't doing well and really needed a friend. I felt that I couldn't turn my back on him so we started talking on the phone and emailing. Then I was visiting him...He was visiting me....And then bam, we're back together. Most of our time together was great. He had just been diagnosed with bipolar ii disorder when he moved back home (though I always had a feeling he was bipolar from his past actions). He was on meds and seemed really stable. After 3 months of being together, he asked if he could come and move in with me. I figured, why not? Seeing him daily would help me know if this could truly work.


Well, within a week and a half, he managed to get wasted and high before going to family's house for dinner...Constantly asked me to get pot for him b/c he "needed" it and it would make him happy. If I showed any annoyance with his request, he would get so angry with me. So, ultimately i'd find some for him so that he'd calm down (i might smoke it every once in a while but drugs are not generally part of my life and his requests made me uncomfortable). Any time he was around alcohol he'd get wasted. Well, I was already doubting that things were going to work out...I mean, if i'd get annoyed b/c he didn't flush the toilet, he'd turn into a huge thing and say that I was on him all of the time. He admitted he had stopped taking his meds for a couple of days b/c he wanted to see if he could still feel good without them. Not good.


I started seeing a therapist and he felt that given our history and what was currently happening, that I needed to end the relationship b/c it was taking too much of a toll on me and the verbal abuse my boyfriend was giving me was inexcusible. So, I asked him to leave.

All hell broke lose, first he was upset and crying....Then he got horribly angry....Then he'd beg for me to come back...Just way too much.

My therapist suggested that I tell his parents what was going on because they needed to know what their son was going through (b/c he was definitely not sharing with them the extremes of the situation). I had a long talk with his dad and then his dad confronted him. He went bullistic. Scared the crap out of me. I did it for him, b/c I knew he's was slowly losing it more and more and his dad needed to be in the picture. After a horrible weekend, he finally gone back to the outer banks. He acts like he hates me and blames me for everything. I know it's the bipolar disease but it's so painful.


I've been crying for days and hate that he could think that I "threw him away" and "don't care about it". I have always been his savior, but generally to my detriment. I hope one day he'll realize that my telling his father what he was doing was only to help him. His family can take better care of him than I can.

Does anyone out there have any similar experiences? Sometimes I feel like i'm crazy. He was horribly mean to me this weekend, but still I feel sad. I miss him but know it's best that he's gone. I still want to know that he's getting treatment and getting better. Should I care?

Does anyone out there have similar experiences to share? Sometimes I feel like i'm the only one going through this....