Blonde Jokes I Hadn't Heard Before

> farthest away
>
> two blondes living in texas were sitting on a bench talking........And
> one blonde says to the other: "which do you think is farther
> away..........Florida or the moon?" the other blonde turns and says
> "helloooooooooo, can you see florida...........?????
>
> car trouble
> a blonde pushes her bmw into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it
> died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She
> says, "what's the story?" he replies, "just crap in the carburetor." she
> asks, "how often do I have to do that?"
>
> speeding ticket
> a police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if
> he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "i wish you guys would
> get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then
> today you expect me to show it to you!"
>
> knitting
> a highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
> glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the
> wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing
> lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his
> bullhorn and yelled , "pull over!" "no!" the blonde yelled back, "it's a
> scarf!"
>
> blonde on the sun
> a russian, an american, and a blonde were talking one day. The russian
> said, "we were the first in space!" the american said, "we were the
> first on the moon!" the blonde said, "so what? We're going to be the
> first on the sun!" the russian and the american looked at each other and
> shook their heads. "you can't land on the sun, you fool! You'll burn
> up!" said the russian. To which the blonde replied, "we're not stupid,
> you know. We're going at night!"
>
> finally, the blonde joke to end all blonde jokes!
> a girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs,
> and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that
> one was named rolex and one was named timex. Her friend said, "whoever
> heard of someone naming dogs like that?" "helloooooo," answered the
> blonde, "they're watch dogs!"



that last one actually hits close to home.... I have a german shepherd named "seiko!"