Joined: 25 May 2006 Posts: 27 Location: north-east / uk
Do I Have Ocd?????? Long Explination Sorry Posted: 05-26-06 11:15am
Please dont laugh (i have already posted
this in the anxiety-stress section aswell
just need some answers)
eversince I can remember I have had
compultions to do little type rituals all
around the number 2.
I have to do things twice, I turn lights
on off on so I have turned it on twice and
off on off so I have turned it off twice.
I swallow in multiples of two, and count
things so that they end on a two ie 1 2 1
2 1 2 not 1 2 3 4
i also dont like to blink at other people,
so if I am conciouse of blinking I look at
the wall or the ski etc and I have to dot
at the end of every letter when im hand
writting ie everything has to have an end.
I know it all sounds stupid and I know
that the world wont end if I dont do it
but I cant help it, but I just cant relax
until I have. I feel like something
horrid will happen even though really I
guess I know it wont.
I know I sound like a freak, but I dont
look stupid running around doing things
twice. I have lived like this for years
and I havce found ways of doing my
compultions without them effecting
everyone, even sometimes without people
noticing.
I just dont want to get worse or be like
this forever, please can anyone advize me?
Is this ocd? Or could it be anything
els? What can I do to stop?
Please help
|
christiahall
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Jun 2006 Posts: 22 Location: Holland
Posted: 06-22-06 03:38am
Hey. You definatly have ocd. The good
news is that if it bothers you, I know
people that have excersized quitting their
wierd rituals the same way on would quit
smoking or quit any other kind of powerful
addiction. Over time, it becomes a lot
easier to deal with, from what I hear.
You have to choose between an excersize in
super strong will power or accepting your
quirks. Maybe you could work on one at a
time... Like start with purposefully
blinking at people. Pick out a few
friends, and tell them that you are going
to blink at them everytime you see them
for a few weeks. Then purposefully make
yourself count to 4 or even 5! Just to
see what happens. I know you won't be
able to relax or even think about anything
else, but surely you would eventually
re-wire your brain.
I don't have ocd but I can relate to the
habbit of being preoccupied by 2's and how
I can understand that it would be hard to
give it up. If you can see the
connection: I am good with computers and
because somehow if I am typing code and I
start an idea without finishing it
properly I just can't relax. I don't have
to realize I didn't finish it. I can just
tell becaue my mind pulls me that way. Or
even if I cut and copy some text on the
computer, somehow I can't relax until i've
pasted it somewhere. I don't know.
|
confusedmuch
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 May 2006 Posts: 27 Location: north-east / uk
Posted: 06-22-06 05:32am
Hi christiahall
thanx for your reply, I asked my step-mam
& she says I have been like this since
I was about 6yrs old. My mam died
suddenly while pg she had dvt, my now step
mam & best friend says that it started
with a cleaning thing. Apparently I used
to stand for hours cleaning my hands over
& over again.
I dont really know when the number two
thing started but it progresivly got
worse. I did manage to cut it down to
just the little two things and nothing els
ie blinking was ok, I didnt have to put
full stops everywere etc. But out of the
blue my gran passed away (she helped my
dad raise me & my sis)
now I know that me stoping had nothing to
do with her passing away, but never
theless my compultions came back to get
me. I do control then & I know that
they doent really bother anyone els, but
im just worried that they will get worse.
