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blondie91

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Jun 2006
Posts: 5
Location: SACRAMENTO
Cheating
Posted: 06-18-06 19:57pm

If you're dating a guy (whos an ass and pays no attention to you) and you cheat on him with someone who treats you right...Is it really that wrong?
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Spirit

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 387
Location: Canada

Posted: 06-19-06 08:35am

No........Definition of dating: to have a social engagement between two persons that often has a romantic character. Nowhere in the dictionary does it say anything about being stuck with one at a time.

But let the other dude know he's out of the picture. :lol:
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Da_Dez_Bombzzz

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jun 2006
Posts: 76
Location: Connecticut, USA

Posted: 06-20-06 00:40am

Just atleast break up with him first, I wouldnt be able to have a guilty conscience.
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saz89

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 12
Location: northeast england

Posted: 03-15-07 06:10am

no it is not!
if the guy ur secretly seing is better for you dump the current one
if the guy ur seing is a compleate person how about you show him you can do better and how dare he treat you so bad he should be so lucky!
but you dont want the name "a cheat"
so be careful!
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Auzzie_Wanting_To_Help

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Feb 2007
Posts: 214
Location: Australia

Posted: 03-15-07 06:43am

I dont understand..... How is it not wrong?? Just because the guy you cheated with is better doesnt mean you havent done the wrong thing!!

If you are looking for someone else or you dont think your current boyfriend is right for you, please just let him go. Its not fair on him if your cheating!!

By the way, i have no time for people that cheat, i have seen it destroy so many relationships and also families that people really dont realise what such an act can cause!!

You need to decide whether you want to stay with your current bf and stop cheating or leave your bf and start another relationship!
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Willa Weintraub

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Joined: 05 Mar 2007
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Re: Cheating
Posted: 03-15-07 08:48am

blondie91 wrote:
If you're dating a guy (whos an ass and pays no attention to you) and you cheat on him with someone who treats you right...Is it really that wrong?
if your with someone like that and your going to cheat,whatrs the point in cheating?why not just break up with them?mayb eyou need to have a talk with your man.Yes it is still cheating
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RedDelight

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006
Posts: 131
Location: I'm a Yettie!
Re: Cheating
Posted: 03-15-07 10:05am

blondie91 wrote:
If you're dating a guy (whos an ass and pays no attention to you) and you cheat on him with someone who treats you right...Is it really that wrong?



Wait a Minute. Laughing Laughing

You are *still* dating him- even though he was an (_)_)? Then yes, you did the right thing Very
Happy

Is that all you are planning to do, or what? Idea

Red Delight
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DPantelones

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Joined: 11 Jan 2007
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Posted: 03-16-07 10:56am

Cheaters are the lowest form of human beings in the world, it's such a selfish act and brings upon so many things that can affect others it's amazing...cheaters never think of the domino affects their actions have, or choose not to recognize them at least.

Say your spouse cheats, you find out by being diagnosed with AIDS. How about that? Or your spouse cheats, the lover becomes obsessive and murders him/her, his/her children and/or spouse, and so on. You see my point.

Cheaters are such cowards, I have NO respect for ANYONE who would cheat. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, like a drunken blunderous moment, but I'm talking about those who intentionally (and like this threads initial author) premeditate it.
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Makoto

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Jul 2006
Posts: 276
Location: Japan

Posted: 03-16-07 18:31pm

Hey ^^

They are dating, not married. She should break up with the guy yes, but she did not do anything even comparable to cheating in a marriage.
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change is good

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 112
Location: Mesa AZ.,

Posted: 03-17-07 06:47am

cheating is cheating - when you are in a commitment that piece of paper called a marriage license is just that - a piece of paper. when you cheat you violate a trust that you have with someone. it doesn't matter if you are married or not. it also doesn't matter if they cheated first or not two wrongs don't ever make it right.
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Makoto

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Jul 2006
Posts: 276
Location: Japan

Posted: 03-18-07 10:41am

No cheating is not cheating. That is too simplistic and absolute.

A deep and meaningful relationship vs dating or something more superficial. The amount of trust is proportionate.

If I am dating some one, all they should expect is the time I spend with them. Even if I am going out with them, but the level of commitment is not deep, there is no obligation on my part to not keep looking for something better.

Once I have made that promise to be with that person and only that person, then if I decide to see other people, can it be considered cheating.

Just because we see each other, have sex, and what not does not mean you own me. Nor does it mean I own you. When you outright promise yourself to another, then breaking that promise in the way we are talking about can it be called cheating.

If you decide to trust some one, more than what is called for, you may think you are being cheated on, but there is the other half who may consider it different.

Lastly, just because you promised yourself to some one does not mean you have control over them. If you do not keep up your efforts in the relationship, then if your partner decides to seek some one else, that is half your blame.

That is why I laugh at the idea of any woman cutting their boyfriend off from sex because of some issue they have. What do you honestly think is going to happen when you use sex/ love making as leverage in a relationship? That goes the same with married people as well, but to differing degrees.
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change is good

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 112
Location: Mesa AZ.,

Posted: 03-19-07 06:21am

please read carefully - i said committed relationship - the degree of commitment is not important. the issue is cheating. i believe that when you make a commitment you form a bond of trust. when it is broken then there is a problem.
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DPantelones

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Posted: 03-19-07 13:44pm

I agree with change is good, regardless of being married or in a relationship, if it's exclusive, cheating IS cheating. It's one person making a choice; instead of dealing with the problem(s) in the relationship, they cheat and make it worse.
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Makoto

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Jul 2006
Posts: 276
Location: Japan

Posted: 03-19-07 18:44pm

Quote:
Please read carefully - I said committed relationship


You may have said committed relationship, but the person who started this post is talking about dating.

Do not forget the level of trust one can expect is proportionate to the level of comittment. Also that leve of comittment must be mutual, just because you feel comitted does not mean you partner might or has been.

So cheating is not always simple as calling it cheating. And there are all kinds of things that people so readilly call cheating, when if fact they may not be.
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change is good

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 112
Location: Mesa AZ.,

Posted: 03-20-07 05:51am

So cheating is not always simple as calling it cheating. And there are all kinds of things that people so readilly call cheating, when if fact they may not be.[/quote]

just out of curiosity, what do you think is acceptable in a relationship? can you kiss someone else, go out on a date with someone else, have empty meaningless sex with someone else? what do you consider cheating and what do you consider ok?
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poison

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Mar 2007
Posts: 6
Re: Cheating
Posted: 03-20-07 17:44pm

blondie91 wrote:
If you're dating a guy (whos an ass and pays no attention to you) and you cheat on him with someone who treats you right...Is it really that wrong?


it's not cheating until you get caught, so go ahead. besides, what makes you so sure he doesn't cheat on you?
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Makoto

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Jul 2006
Posts: 276
Location: Japan

Posted: 03-21-07 05:50am

Quote:
just out of curiosity, what do you think is acceptable in a relationship? Can you kiss someone else, go out on a date with someone else, have empty meaningless sex with someone else? What do you consider cheating and what do you consider ok?


I consider many things to be acceptable and some things not.

For example, if you are just daing, then yes it is acceptable to date one person one night and another night date some one else. And no you do not have to tell these people you are daiting some one else. They have no right to know your pesonal business, they only have to right to be concerned about what is involved in the context of their date.

If she is date a guy, then she can by all means see other people.

If she is going out with some one, and falls for another person and has relations with that person that is also fine. The only thing she must do is break it off with guy number 1 first. But that is not cheating as well.

I can go on, but I am not going to until you also define what you consider cheating to be.
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change is good

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 112
Location: Mesa AZ.,

Posted: 03-21-07 05:59am

it's pointless to go on. i will guess that you have never been cheated on. well my wife just told me she cheated on me while we were separated. i suppose that would be ok with you because we were separated.
so i doubt if you and i would ever agree on what's cheating and what's not
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Willa Weintraub

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Posted: 03-21-07 07:11am

change is good wrote:
it's pointless to go on. i will guess that you have never been cheated on. well my wife just told me she cheated on me while we were separated. i suppose that would be ok with you because we were separated.
so i doubt if you and i would ever agree on what's cheating and what's not
Crying
or Very sad i'm sorry dave. . .I know how it feels.
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tigresacanela24

Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Nov 2005
Posts: 5261
Location: Treat your children well, eventually they'll choose your nursing home.

Posted: 03-21-07 07:50am

I'm sorry, but I was under the impression that you couldn't cheat on someone that you're not committed to.
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