Marvin,
maybe it is more that I fear going into
bed at night because I won't fall asleep.
My mind whirls and then I get frightened
that I am not going to sleep - so then the
worrying of falling asleep begins. ..
This all began 40 years ago, when I was
young. I was sleeping and my phone in
the bedroom rang and startled me; the next
night the blind fell and woke me and
startled me; the following night, the
phone rang again and awokened me, and that
began my mind worrying about what is going
to happen tonight - will I fall asleep and
if I don't, I need to get up for work at 7
am. This went on nite after nite and I
became really nervous and sick over it.
I finally went to a doctor. He had said
if I had gone to him when those worrisome
thoughts it first began, he would have
given me sleeping pills just to put me to
sleep so I would not have had to worry
about the not falling asleep. Those
thoughts were ingrained in my mind and
needless to say, they are still there - 40
years later. .. Well, that is what
started my insomnia which never not got
any better and I am still frightened to go
into bed b/c I know I will not fall
asleep. Sounds crazy but that is what
happened. I wonder what disorder this
would be called? No doctor could help me
or tell me how to get the thoughts out of
my mind. I don't think a sleep doctor
could help me.
Thanks for listening,
marionalma
