I have a serious problem. My girlfriend
and I have a long distance relationship.
I live in georgia, right by the florida
border, but she lives all the way in iowa.
She used to live in my town, but then
her family moved up there. We told each
other we will still try to keep it going.
We talked almost every day on the phone
or on msn messenger. Lately she started
pressuring me into sex. I, being stupid,
told her that I will do whatever she
wants, because I loved her.
A few weeks ago, my girlfriend and I had
sex while I was visiting her. I
immediately regretted doing it and had a
bad feeling. She called me up the other
day telling me that she thinks she is
pregnant. I have no idea what to do now.
I am so nervous I can't sleep and I have
no appetite. I am so worried about the
future, about what I am going to do if she
is pregnant. Right now, I am going into
my senior year of high school and she is
going to be a junior. I realize that
this could mess up our lives, but she
doesn't understand the gravity of the
situation. So far only a few close
friends know about it, but if my parents
found out, they would kill me. My life
as I know it would be over. I am worried
about her too. I tried talking to her
about what we are going to do, but she
tells me that she isn't worried about
that. She says that what she is worrying
about is if I will stay or not. I
don’t know what to do. Right now I am
feeling a little bit used and betrayed
because I feel she pressured me into
having sex. I am trying to calm down,
but I can't. All I have been thinking
about is what is going to happen. I know
that my parents cannot find out or my life
is over. But at the same time, I know
that the more I hide it, the more it will
come out.
Our parents don't know each other
personally, and hers didn't even really
know we were going out, so I am not too
worried about them telling my parents.
My girlfriend told me that she will say
that it is another guy. But even if they
do not tell my parents, my girlfriend
still has friends here in ga. Some of
her friends' parents are friends with my
parents, so I am worrying that if they
find out she is pregnant, they will put
one and one together and think that I am
the father. Then they will tell their
parents, and their parents will tell mine.
I feel bad for thinking about leaving
her now, but I do not see a way that I can
still stay in contact without my parents
finding out.
This whole situation has gotten me sick, I
fear for our futures. I cannot stop
thinking about what she is going to do.
Having a baby in high school could be
devastating. This is all I think about
anymore, I am so scared right now. I am
usually not the kind of guy that cries,
but a few nights ago, I didn't sleep, I
was crying in my bed for the entire night.
I am so confused and do not know what to
do. Please, if you have any suggestions
on what we should do, please tell me.
Edit: I forgot to put this in there: she
does not want an abortion, so that option
is out.
|
Becky
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jan 2006 Posts: 6220 Location: London, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:7
Posted: 07-24-06 16:17pm
When you had sex did you use a condom?
|
a guy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Jul 2006 Posts: 7
Posted: 07-24-06 16:30pm
Yes, I used a condom. Oh, and we were
virgins before this.
|
Becky
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jan 2006 Posts: 6220 Location: London, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:7
Posted: 07-24-06 16:33pm
If you used a condom properly and checked
afterwards to make sure there was no leaks
then chances are she is not pregnant. I
think you guys need to sit down and talk
about your future.
Good luck with everything.
|
a guy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Jul 2006 Posts: 7
Posted: 07-24-06 16:50pm
I tried to talk about our future, but she
doesn't want to talk about it. The main
reason I am so worried is that she is
showing many symptoms of pregnancy.
|
~*~Jillian~*~
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Feb 2005 Posts: 1759 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: 07-24-06 17:48pm
Hunny if you used a condom--properly..Then
chances are she isnt pregnant
she is probably scared that you are going
to leave her ...And she is trying to scare
you--she is probably lying to you..Or else
she is just scared being that it was her
first time--all the symptoms are in her
head..
Tell her how you feel and also let her
know ...That if she is making this up
..Then you guys are done for sure..Because
thats nothing to joke around about..
|
a guy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Jul 2006 Posts: 7
Posted: 07-24-06 18:07pm
I am really good at telling if she is
lieing, and I don't think she is. We just
finished talking and she is telling me
that she is feeling better, so I guess I
will just have to wait and see. I am
trying to convince her to go to a clynic
to be tested. She told me that she would
try to go, but I don't know if she
actually do it.
|
a guy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Jul 2006 Posts: 7
Posted: 07-24-06 19:03pm
I don't think it has been long enough for
her to have missed her period. In the
excitement, I forgot to even ask that.
But she has told me that she has an upset
stomach, her back hurts, her appetite has
been off, she is having mood swings, and
she has been unusually tired. She plays
golf, so we are hoping she is sore from
that or a cold. But the funny thing is
that she never gets sick. She told me
that she hasn't been sick at all over the
past five years, so I am still worrying.
|
Ingi
Moderator
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8434 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 121
Thanked:156
Posted: 07-24-06 19:43pm
If she hasn't missed her period, she
wouldn't be having symptoms like that.
Wait until she misses her period before
you start panicking.
|
~*~Jillian~*~
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Feb 2005 Posts: 1759 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: 07-24-06 19:47pm
Anyone can get sick at
anytime...Regardless how long its been
since they have been before--so maybe she
is just coming down with something..
And other things that could be causing
these so called "symptoms"...Is her
stressing and thinking she is pregnant
...
Considering that it was both you guys
"first time"..There is always that first
thought of omg..What have I done..Is she
pregnant? ...Or her thinking omg am I
pregnant?...I remember thinking and
panicking about the same thing...After my
first time..So just relax and dont worry
about it ...Because she is more than
likely *not* pregnant..--just make sure
next time you end up having sex ..You
arent pressured into it..Only do it when
you feel the time is right...
|
a guy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Jul 2006 Posts: 7
Posted: 07-24-06 19:58pm
Thanks a ton guys, I really appreciate the
help. Now I just have to wait.
|
~*~Jillian~*~
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Feb 2005 Posts: 1759 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: 07-24-06 20:17pm
Your welcome...
|
a guy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Jul 2006 Posts: 7
Posted: 07-27-06 17:01pm
Thanks for all the help and encouragement,
everyone. Turns out I was worrying for
nothing, the test came out negative.
|
Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 07-28-06 07:02am
Well the next time something like that
happens you need to grow up and take
responsibility for your actions and step
up.You were thinking about leaving her
because of it?Thats really lame
The site is not a replacement for professional medical opinion, examination, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of your medical doctor or other qualified health professional before starting any new treatment or making any changes to existing treatment. Do not delay seeking or disregard medical advice based on information written by any author on this site. No health questions and information on eHealth Forum is regulated or evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration and therefore the information should not be used to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease without the supervision of a medical doctor. Posts made to these forums express the views and opinions of the author, and not the administrators, moderators, or editorial staff and hence eHealth Forum and its principals will accept no liabilities or responsibilities for the statements made.
Schizophreniahealth
This page was last updated on June 11, 2008