How do you make someone understand your
side of the story? My boyfriend and I
found out we were prego last week. He
wants the big a. I refuse. He said he
wants to fall in love naturally and get
married someday and then we could have
kids. He said he doesnt want an
illegitamate child and he's not ready to
get married because he isnt 100%
unconditionally in love with me yet. I
told him that I thought the exact same
thing but too bad!! We knew there was a
possibility, we knew this could happen.
He doesnt want it, but I wont give it up.
I did not want to get prego, but I did.
And now I will love and nourish this child
when he/she comes. We're having this baby
whether he likes it or not. I am not
going to let down my guard... My
religion, morals, etc. And I will do
everything I can to give this child a good
life. But... I dont think he will
support my decision. I think if I
continue that we are going to be through.
Any advice on how I might get him to
rethink or reconsider his view of this?
He is a great guy, amazing, wonderful...
Until it comes to this. So he's not
ready to pass out cigars to his buddies...
Well... Why does that reason justify the
a in his mind!?
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trina1
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Jun 2005 Posts: 528 Location: , Lost in Oz.
Posted: 08-07-06 10:36am
First of all...I commend you for sticking
up for your beliefs and the human life
that the two of you have created. Your bf
may simply be scared....But you have to
reconcile yourself to the fact that he may
not come around to your way of thinking.
You then have to ask yourself if you even
want someone who would cut and run in such
away in your life? Raising a child alone
is difficult...But not impossible. I know
of what I speak. I would simply tell
him....Even if "he" doesn't love and want
"his" child....That you do and that you
will love and protect this little
life...Even if it means protecting it from
him.
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trina1
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Jun 2005 Posts: 528 Location: , Lost in Oz.
Posted: 08-07-06 22:45pm
Ruby...Please know that if you need to
talk....You can pm me. :)
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BrianBaby
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2005 Posts: 1383
Posted: 08-10-06 20:03pm
Hun, this is still new to him so give him
some time. I'm sure he'll come around
eventually.
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Brianne
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Sep 2006 Posts: 4 Location: Florida
Posted: 09-05-06 17:23pm
I would suggest giving him some time to
wrap his head around things....Guys take a
little longer. If he doesn't come
around..Continue on. Thats all you can
really do.
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 09-05-06 17:45pm
Please no one jump on me for posting
here... I have a suggestion that no one
has offered yet.
Have you considered adoption? Then he
could still "fall in love naturally", and
you wouldn't lose him. Plus, the child
will still have a chance for life.
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trina1
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Jun 2005 Posts: 528 Location: , Lost in Oz.
Posted: 09-05-06 18:55pm
eiri
wrote:
please no one jump on me for
posting here... I have a suggestion that
no one has offered yet.
Have you considered adoption? Then he
could still "fall in love naturally", and
you wouldn't lose him. Plus, the child
will still have a chance for
life.
good suggestion eiri. Thank you for
bringing it up.
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Jules
Moderator
Joined: 19 Aug 2006 Posts: 3760 Location: Merrie Englande, UK
Thanks: 79
Thanked:66
Posted: 09-06-06 01:15am
Adoption is an option of course, but why
should she give her child up just to keep
hold of a man who is being far from
supportive? I know he might change his
mind but I doubt it; he says he doesn't
unconditionally love her now. He just
forgot to add '...And I probably never
will.'
sorry if i'm being too harsh
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Emma2
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 May 2006 Posts: 4406 Location: Montreal, Canada
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 09-07-06 14:04pm
Why would she want to give up her baby for
a boyfriend whom doesnt even love her
....(sorry but he doesnt). Thats
foolishness....The childs life is the most
important now..Not the relationship that
is clearly not going anywhere with or
without the baby.....She will resent him
for life if she does what he wants ....
