Am I Ready to Have a Baby? Posted: 10-06-06 14:06pm
I have major baby fever! I'm 24 and am
with the most wonderful man, (he's 26) who
will make the most wonderful father!
We've been together for a year and a half
and have an absolutely awesome
relationship. For the past year or so, I
just cannot get my mind off of
babies...And now, of course, being the age
that I am - a lot of my friends are having
children and it seems to make my "baby
lust" as they call it even
worse...Becoming a mommy is the most
important thing to me...I absolutely
cannot wait! I need to wait until my
hunny and I are in a better situation
financially, but I feel as though within
the next year or so I will definitely be
emotionally and financially ready to have
a little one. The thing is, i'm so
worried about what people will think of
me, as me and my boyfriend are not yet
married. Honestly a baby means much more
to me than a wedding, so in my mind, it
makes sense to do it a little bit
backwards, traditionally. But people can
be so negative and I don't want my child
to feel ashamed having to tell his/her
peers that his/her mom & dad were not
married when he/she was born. I'm such a
worrier! I'm just wondering what people
think of this situation...Thanks much!
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 10-06-06 14:36pm
You shouldnt care what others think about
it.Your 24 years old woman!!! Lol are you
engeaged? If you are planing on getting
married why not? But only if your ready
for it and you have to make sure he is
too. I doubt your child will be looked
down on because their parents were not
married before they had him/er. There are
so many teen parents out there who wont
even get married to their other half, let
alone get married a little late. You
should just let things run their course
and not try but don't stop it either.I say
again,make sur your man is ready and se
how he feels about the baby before
marriage
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 10-06-06 15:12pm
I pretty much agree with .Melissa_20!
Don't worry about what others think!
Waiting antyher year is a good idea and
making sure that your significant other is
ready to be a father is a good idea
because having a baby can change a
relationship in alot of ways and wanting a
baby and having a baby is two different
things believe me, they are great and
everything but they are pretty much a full
time job but they can be a rewarding job,
I had two but they are both grown and are
on their own and I have no regrets except
that I wish this war would end because my
son is about ready to go to iraq for his
3rd time and that scares me, even when
they are older, you still worry!
I wish you both all the best!
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Sunflower_pie81
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Jan 2006 Posts: 5041 Location: to hell with this crap
Posted: 10-06-06 15:25pm
Making sure you are ready to have a baby
is a good place to start. Emotionally it
does take a tole on you and your
ralationship. But you may have a great
one and no one needs a piece of paper to
tell you that you have a 'great'
relationship with love and everything that
you need to bring a child into this world.
Having money is a good place to start
too. Lol
All I read was your heading, and that was
enough. You shouldnt have to ask anyone
if you are ready for a baby. You and your
partner are the only ones that can answer
that question. If you feel the need to
ask people, they may be a sign that you
are unsure and not ready.
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 10-06-06 16:14pm
nataliachick7
wrote:
all I read was your heading,
and that was enough. You shouldnt have
to ask anyone if you are ready for a baby.
You and your partner are the only ones
that can answer that question. If you
feel the need to ask people, they may be a
sign that you are unsure and not
ready.
thats not totally
true.She may have just wanted outside
opinions or maybe thought someone would
say that the baby fever she was having
might blow over.
all I read was your heading,
and that was enough. You shouldnt have
to ask anyone if you are ready for a baby.
You and your partner are the only ones
that can answer that question. If you
feel the need to ask people, they may be a
sign that you are unsure and not
ready.
thats not totally
true.She may have just wanted outside
opinions or maybe thought someone would
say that the baby fever she was having
might blow
over.
like I said, if she needs to come on here
for outside opnions on whether or not she
should have a baby, which is by the way
one of the biggest life changing events,
she is probably not too sure and not
ready. I dont ask strangers to make life
altering desicions for me, thats insane.
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leeannep4
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Sep 2006 Posts: 32
Posted: 10-07-06 13:18pm
I truly think that the only person you
should have to ask about having a baby is
your man, being that this will be his
child and change his life forever too. I
don't think anyone other than the two of
you can decide if you are ready to
experience the joys of parenthood.
However, I do understand your need to ask
others and think that this is a perfectly
normal questioning process that many women
go through before making the decision.
Some people just need to ask for opinions
and advice before making any decisions.
I don't get the impression that you are
asking us to make this life altering
decision for you, like you are going to
make tally marks of what we say and then
make a decision. I think you are simply
looking for a little advice and direction
from your cyber friends before making any
decisions, and that is perfectly okay and
normal in my opinion. Some women are
just a little indecisive and need a little
guidance from their friends. My sister
can't buy a pair of underwear without
asking my opinion.Lol
my advice to you is talk with your guy,
explain your feelings and emotions to him
and see how he feels. I think that it's
definitely not something you want to do
yet if he's not ready. Good luck.
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DLosGirl82
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006 Posts: 47 Location: NH
Thank You :o) Posted: 10-11-06 13:01pm
Thank you to all of you who posted advice
for me in regards to my question about
being ready for a little one! You guys
are the best
i am definitely aware that me and my guy
will be the ones to ultimately make the
decision...I was just curious as to how
other women felt about the whole thing.
All of your advice helped a lot, thank
you so much!!
<3 rachel
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brad1849
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Oct 2006 Posts: 1
Re: Am I Ready to Have a Baby? Posted: 10-11-06 13:17pm
Hello, let me inform you of something. It
do not matter what other people think
about you .
As long as you and your hubby is happy :d
and you know that he is the one that your
going to marry, then honey nothing else
matters. I know that you are worried
about your baby peers teasing him/her
About their mom & dad are not married.
But by the time your baby become of age
to have friends that can understand, you
will be already married to your hubby .
Honey I was the same way
. I use to worry about what other people
will think of me if I get pregnant out of
wedlock .
But as my pregnancy came along, everyone
was focus on a new baby coming . If you really
want a baby and you know that you are
going to marry the father of your child.
Then I would say; go ahead and have your
baby. Be happy :d , you only have one
life to live. You need to live that life
for you, not for other people.
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Sandbox Party
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Jul 2006 Posts: 7276
Posted: 10-11-06 13:19pm
Happiness doesnt pay the bills.
Wake up and welcome yourself into the real
world.
No matter how bad you want it, make sure u
can afford it.
Dont do it just because you *think* u
might be able to in the near future.
Wait til you can.
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laura_friesen
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Feb 2006 Posts: 610 Location: , Canada
Posted: 10-11-06 13:19pm
My fiance and I just had a baby together,
we were engaged b4 it happened so thats a
good thing hehe. But you shouldn';t care
about what people think, I mean it's one
thing to say i'm 16 and I want a baby u
kno? I was worried about my unplanned
pregnancy because my parents and
everything are very religious and I went
to church and it's really surprising how
people will react ( good thing ). But
anyways, good luck!
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Jules
Supporter
Joined: 19 Aug 2006 Posts: 3759 Location: Merrie Englande, UK
Thanks: 78
Thanked:66
Re: Am I Ready to Have a Baby? Posted: 10-11-06 13:20pm
brad1849
wrote:
hello, let me inform you of
something. It do not matter what other
people think about you .
As long as you and your hubby is happy :d
and you know that he is the one that your
going to marry, then honey nothing else
matters. I know that you are worried
about your baby peers teasing him/her
About their mom & dad are not married.
But by the time your baby become of age
to have friends that can understand, you
will be already married to your hubby .
Honey I was the same way
. I use to worry about what other people
will think of me if I get pregnant out of
wedlock .
But as my pregnancy came along, everyone
was focus on a new baby coming . If you really
want a baby and you know that you are
going to marry the father of your child.
Then I would say; go ahead and have your
baby. Be happy :d , you only have one
life to live. You need to live that life
for you, not for other
people.
wow - did you manage to use every
smiley in that post?!!!
Congratulations!!!
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Re: Am I Ready to Have a Baby? Posted: 10-11-06 14:00pm
purestgreen
wrote:
brad1849
wrote:
hello, let me inform you of
something. It do not matter what other
people think about you .
As long as you and your hubby is happy
:d and you know that he is the one that
your going to marry, then honey nothing
else matters. I know that you are
worried about your baby peers teasing
him/her
About their mom & dad are not married.
But by the time your baby become of
age to have friends that can understand,
you will be already married to your hubby
.
Honey I was the same way
. I use to worry about what other
people will think of me if I get pregnant
out of wedlock .
But as my pregnancy came along,
everyone was focus on a new baby coming
. If you really
want a baby and you know that you are
going to marry the father of your child.
Then I would say; go ahead and have your
baby. Be happy :d , you only have one
life to live. You need to live that
life for you, not for other
people.
wow - did you manage to use every
smiley in that post?!!!
Congratulations!!!
lol, I was thinking
the same thing.
Last edited by Melissa_20 on 10-11-06 14:36pm; edited 1 time in total
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DLosGirl82
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006 Posts: 47 Location: NH
Posted: 10-11-06 14:03pm
I am just full of questions, here! :p
my mom tells me that it's perfectly normal
for me to be having such a strong desire
to be a mommy at this age...Especially
where i've found the right man to be a
husband and father. We are most
definitely not financially stable enough
to support a little one right now...And I
would never just have a baby if I couldn't
take care of it properly...But am I like,
a total freak for wanting this so badly?
Lol! I know that having a child
drastically changes your entire life and
pretty much throws you into the poorhouse,
but it still seems like the most wonderful
thing that could ever happen to a
person...To become a parent. I feel like
a weirdo!
p.S. As you guys can probably tell, I
worry way too much about what other people
think! :p
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 10-11-06 14:37pm
No its not stupid and your not crazy.Your
just at that point in your life where your
ready and you want one.You just need the
$$$
.
As long as you and your hubby is happy :d
and you know that he is the one that your
going to marry, then honey nothing else
matters. I know that you are worried
about your baby peers teasing him/her 
About their mom & dad are not married.
But by the time your baby become of age
to have friends that can understand, you
will be already married to your hubby 
.
Honey I was the same way 
. I use to worry about what other people
will think of me if I get pregnant out of
wedlock 
.
But as my pregnancy came along, everyone
was focus on a new baby coming 
. If you really
want a baby and you know that you are
going to marry the father of your child.
Then I would say; go ahead and have your
baby. Be happy :d , you only have one
life to live. You need to live that life
for you, not for other people.
