Hey there everyone. Things seemed to be
goin great..Well, that changed. My
parents are takin things hard again all of
a sudden. Dan dropped out to get his ged.
I cant take the stress...A woman called
me today calling "first dibs" on my baby.
Her husband had cancer and no agency will
allow them to adopt. I honestly dont
think I can do it anymore. I cant even do
my own laundry. Im helpless.. And today
dan told me "i give up." I was not
prepared for this, and def. Not on my
own. I think it would be an honorable
decision but I am scared.. my life is only
guna get better...Eternity is waitin
love mol
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JillMarie
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Dec 2003 Posts: 3022 Location: Iowa
Posted: 01-29-04 19:42pm
I really wish I had some good advice, but
all I can say is take things 1 day at a
time and remember that everything does get
better with time.
Sweetie,
do you want to give up your baby. It is
hard. I know that. But if you want that
baby like I believe it was kelly said
"anything worth having is worth working
hard for". You can do it.
Love,
chanda
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HannanCrazy
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2004 Posts: 84 Location: lOvIn Ma GuRl aLySsA
Posted: 01-29-04 22:59pm
I will tell you now, when you hold your
baby for the first time, strike that, when
you hear that little gasp, then that
little cry, it is the most life altering
thing in the entire world. Though alyssa
has me so worn out and she is only 3 days
old, I couldn't have given her up. Just
think about it before you make your final
decision hun!
Hanna and alyssa
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insurancegirl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Sep 2003 Posts: 5286
Posted: 01-30-04 09:55am
Last edited by insurancegirl on 10-05-04 10:54am; edited 1 time in total
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Mesmerizeu15
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Aug 2003 Posts: 2729 Location: Pittsburgh,PA
Posted: 01-30-04 10:03am
I agree with almost everyone on here, and
they are my girls. But I do have to say
something well actually I want to ask you
something. What do you want? Do you want
to keep the baby? What is your story? I
personally dont believe in adoption but if
it your last choice I guess you gotta do
what you gotta do. I hope that everything
works out for you. I cant say that I will
be here for you to really talk to on this
one, because I am not sure how I feel.
Good luck in the future!!
*stacie*
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hotlilcheerleader
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Oct 2003 Posts: 86
Posted: 01-30-04 10:15am
Molly,
hi, I am 19 years old and I will be 23
weeks pregnant tomorrow. When I first
got the news that I was pregnant, it was
the happiest day of my life. My fiancee
and I had been trying for a baby for about
4 or 5 months. When I did find out that
I was pregnant, I had what my doctor
called a threatened miscarriage. For the
next 3 months, I had to be so careful, I
was bed ridden most of the day, I couldn’t
do anything that would jeopardize our
baby’s health. So I didn’t, 3 months
passed and my baby was still there, happy
and healthy. At 17 weeks, I found out
that I was carrying a little boy. I
couldn’t have been any happier and I
didn’t think that anything could shatter
that happiness. Just a week later, my
fiancee of 11 months came to me and said
that he didn’t want to marry me or be with
my son or me. He started to deny
paternity of him saying that there is no
way, that I must have cheated on him.
And of course I didn’t, I loved this man.
Come to find out only 2 weeks ago that
the reason he was leaving me was so that
he could marry some bimbo in a vegas
chapel only 3 days after leaving me. I
graduated high school in 2001 on honors of
recognition, the top 1% of my class, I was
saludictorian (2nd of my graduating class)
with a full scholarship to go to the
university of my choice and become a
doctor. I began college in the spring of
2002 and continued through until I became
pregnant, when I professor suggested that
I just take some time to enjoy my
pregnancy and my fiancee, so I did. Now
look at me, I will have a newborn, an
unfinished dream and I will have to work.
I cannot do both schooling to be a
doctor, work enough hours and support this
baby. And although this may seem like a
bad decision for some of you, I have
decided that my best option would be to
put him up for open adoption. Though it
may seem selfish, I don’t want even a part
of me to blame my son for me not being
able to go back to college. The family
that I have found to adopt him is so
loving. They have a 5 year old daughter
and because of a bad c-section with her,
they are no longer able to have children
and they wanted 5 or 6. They have stable
careers, they are good to each other and
best of all they have been happily married
for 13 years. I think they are
incredible and their daughter is so lucky
to have them and I know that my son will
be too. I know that adoption is so hard
to think about, but you need to think
about not just the next few months, but
the next 18 years of both of your lives.
Hilary
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Mesmerizeu15
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Aug 2003 Posts: 2729 Location: Pittsburgh,PA
Posted: 01-30-04 10:18am
I hope that I didnt offend you from saying
what I said, I just have a certain way of
feeling about things.. I hope that I have
not offended any of the girls on this
site. I love you all very much. I am
sorry..Loads of love, stacie
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insurancegirl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Sep 2003 Posts: 5286
Posted: 01-30-04 11:44am
Last edited by insurancegirl on 10-05-04 10:54am; edited 1 time in total
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nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4921 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 01-30-04 14:10pm
Hey! Im sure there is a great family that
would love your baby more than anything
like it was their own! I would love to
adopt your baby! You have to make your
decision if you can do it and try or let
another family get the privelage. Im
sorry your in a bind right now. If you
need anyone to talk to im here!
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KariM18
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jan 2004 Posts: 1436 Location: Grand Blanc, Michigan
Posted: 01-30-04 14:53pm
Hey hun. . . I think what your
thinking about is very mature. (how old
r u by the way, and how far along again?)
anyhow. . Basically u cant think about
yourself anymore.. U have to think about
only the baby and what u believe will be
best for it. If u think adoption is the
way then thats great too. There are sooo
many peoople who cant have kids and would
die to adopt so I think that decisision is
a very unselfish one.. Doing whats best
for your baby is what makes u the best
mom.. Wether u raise it or not* hilary,
the same goes to you, adoption is never a
bad decision if u think its right for your
baby. Where r u both from?
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pInKpAnThEr
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jan 2004 Posts: 626 Location: Indiana
Posted: 01-30-04 16:20pm
Hey there..Hilary thats so awesome what
you're going to do with your life..And I
honestly respect it...Well I am 23 or so
weeks..And im 16 years old.
I have grown up in your typical
"athletic, church family, missionary
brothers and sisters home." my sister went
through her rough stage with drugs and
alchol and my brother was mr. Perfect. I
was born 10 years after the both of them
as a mistake and I became the
"permiscuious" daughter..(mind u,ive only
been with one guy) I love danny to death,
but i'm not sure if hes ready to be the
daddy she needs. He got kicked out of
school for missing so much. Sure, hes
going to get his g.E.D. And everything,
but he doesnt seem too motivated...
Its been so rough with my family because
they wanted so much for me. Im notttt
saying I dont love this little girl inside
of me already, but I want her to have a
good life, and im not quite sure I can
give her a stable one. Sure, acting on my
emotions i'll say "this is my baby, no one
elses, no one can love her like I do." and
for the most part...Thats true..But I
think maybe even a better way of showing
her I love her is to give her the best
life I can...Even if it's not with me.
As a rededicated christian I pray for her
every day, and im confident god has a
perfect plan for her life. I pray for
wisdom, and that he'll give me the
strength I need to make the right decision
for her.
Sure, i'd love to go to a performing arts
school to pursue my career as a
choreographer, and I have dreams, but if I
am truely meant to be the one to raise
her...So be it.
I guess I just need prayers and advice
from whoever possible. You girls are
soooo awesome and nothing you have said is
offensive...Especially considering that
many of you have children already, and are
doing fine..Which is such an
inspiration...
So imana let ya'all go now...But any
thoughts on the idea are very much
appreciated.
Love molly
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insurancegirl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Sep 2003 Posts: 5286
Posted: 01-30-04 16:25pm
Last edited by insurancegirl on 10-05-04 10:55am; edited 1 time in total
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nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4921 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 01-30-04 16:43pm
Molly im glad you are praying about this!
Its the best thing to do. You dont know
gods plan but whatever it is, it will work
out fine. I know you love this baby so
much and because you do, you want her to
have the best life! Just keep praying and
youll get your answer!!