How Could I Be So Stupid? Posted: 01-01-07 10:06am
Well....Just a few days ago I posted
talking about how everything was
going...And it was going good(i thought).
Today is the first day of a newyear and
it turned out to not be so "happy". Like
most of you know I am 28 weeks pregnant
and here is what happened....
I have known that my fiance works a lot.
Since I found out I was pregnant he took
on 2 jobs instead of just 1. We were
suppose to be moving in together and
getting married before the baby gets here.
I have been living with my mom and I
have to move out after the baby is born.
Anyway, especially for the past 2 months
my fiance I have noticed that he "says" he
has been working a lot and thats his
excuse to us not seeing each other hardly
b/c he worked a 3rd shift job and a first
and its been hard to make time. I didnt
like tha fact we didnt see each other a
lot but I have kept my mouth shut b/c I
thought he was working hard.
I found out the other day that he has not
told his parents that I am pregnant. He
lives with them and all but that has been
bothering me and to top that off guess
what happened last night.....
My dad, lil sister, brother, and sister in
law went out to eat and I stayed home(as
usual). My phone rang and it was my
fiance at like 11p.M. He told me that he
was at a restaurant eating and my family
was there and that my dad went over to his
table and ran his mouth....(i was thinking
what are you doing out to eat when you
tell me you have no time or money and why
hadnt he taken me?) but I didnt say
anything, anyway thats all he said about
it and so I let it go....He told me
goodnight and that he loves me as usual.
I got suspicious and called my sister to
ask what went on. Come to find out my
dad went over to the table b/c my sister
said my fiance was with a girl and a bunch
of his friends. When my dad aproached
him he denied to the girl he was with that
I am pregnant with his child, he said it
wasnt his. My sister said she saw my
fiance's face and he got embaressed when
this happened and the girl he was with got
pissed and told my dad to go away.
I sat up all last night thinking to myself
how could he deny our son like that and
then have the nerve to call me and tell me
he loves me like I wouldnt find out. I
am lost now, this means we wont be moving
in together and I won't have anywhere at
all to go. I havn't called him on it
yet, I don't know how to go about handling
it???Any suggestions????
I have lost all my friends b/c I can't go
out and party and stuff anymore so they
quit calling and now he is going to be out
of the picture and on top of that get me a
bad reputation b/c he lied and said it
wasn't his. I am all alone now, no
money, no house, and noone to talk
to.....I dont know what I am going to do
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SamanthaM
Supporter
Joined: 15 Dec 2005 Posts: 2079 Location: Mishawaka, Indiana
Thanks: 2
Thanked:1
Posted: 01-01-07 11:50am
First of all, you aren't the stupid
one..He is. He sounds like an problem and
you and your child would be better of
without him.
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oh_mommy
Supporter
Joined: 04 Sep 2005 Posts: 3694 Location: vancouver island, bc canada
Posted: 01-01-07 17:09pm
Would it be possible to talk to your
family and ask if u could stay there for
abit concidering whats going on?
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Magical Logic
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Mar 2006 Posts: 2248
Posted: 01-01-07 17:15pm
I kinda know how u feel my sons father
turned out to a be an problem right after
I found out I was pregnant I learned he
was married when I was 7 weeks pregnant he
started that crap that it was not his baby
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kezia333
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2005 Posts: 133 Location: Texas
Posted: 01-02-07 14:40pm
Thanks everyone....I just wanted to post
about it so I could get it off my
chest...Any advice or anything is greatly
appreciated.
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babyonboard16
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Jan 2007 Posts: 5 Location: Oklahoma
Posted: 01-03-07 07:18am
Sounds like he doesnt deserve you any guy
that can do that doesnt
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diamondsz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3173 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 74
Thanked:104
Posted: 01-03-07 12:19pm
You deserve better! Dont worry you will
make it, for our children we can do just
about anything. Im moving out in
march/april to a 4 bdrm house I have two
kids so it gonna be rough but im going to
make it I already took on a second job
that I can work on at home.
If you need to get welfare dont feel
ashamed sometimes they offer courses that
you can take that will get you in a better
finacial sitiuation.
All the best to you, btw the kids father
is a complete problem, funny I got married
to a sweetheart and now hes verbally
abusive, possesive and is feels that canad
should mold to his culture, yeah fing
right, welcome to canada!
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kezia333
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2005 Posts: 133 Location: Texas
Posted: 01-05-07 09:17am
Thanks for the encouragement, it helps to
know that people understand. I don't
know what will end up happening with me
and him but I am trying to focus on school
and my pregnancy as much as possible. I
am due in like 11 weeks. I have not
deceided what I am going to do about
moving out and all that right now but
hopefully I can get it worked out!!!
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 01-05-07 09:47am
I'm so sorry you have to go through
soething like this especially when your
pregnant.I would ask mom and dad if you
can stay until you get on your feet.I
doubt after what they just saw that they
will kick you out with no where to go.It's
not like its your fault he cheated.If you
haven't talked to him about it,just tell
him flat out you know and asked him
why,for your piece of mind of course.Are
you going to stay with him?
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kezia333
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2005 Posts: 133 Location: Texas
Posted: 01-07-07 11:53am
I don't know, it's a weird situation, we
have been together for so long and it
really angers me off that we were getting
ready to move in together and get married.
I still have not talked to him at all.
It happened a week ago and he still has
not called, I think he is scared to b/c he
knows I know but I have made up my mind I
am not calling him, I feel it's his place
since he is the one that ruined things and
if he don't call then in 11 weeks(if he
don't come early which he is suppose to)
then I will go to the hospital and have
him by myself and go from there. I am
trying to get over being hurt and just get
mad but its hard, I love him with all my
heart and I hate it that my son won't have
his dad, but I already love my son more
than him and so I am going to try to make
things good for him.
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pack_rat3333
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Feb 2006 Posts: 10
Posted: 01-07-07 15:57pm
I have been there alone and pregnant.My
childs father left when I was 3 months
pregnant.He had gotten another girl
prgnant yes it all hurts, but I what im
gonna tell u u can do anything u dont need
him. I was a highschool drop out I was
16 and my fam wouldnt help me.I bounced
from place to place untill my child was
born and my grandma took me in.My daughter
is now 4 yrs old I graduated high school
and work full time now I am makeing it on
my own and no one can take that away from
me or her. She has never seen her father
and I do not wish to cantact him. If my
child ever askes I will tell her but
untill then he is not a factor in our
lives. I guess what I am saying is u as
a women are stronger than u think u will
give birth for goddess sakes. You can do
anything just find the strength inside u
and push forward.
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kezia333
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2005 Posts: 133 Location: Texas
Posted: 01-08-07 14:35pm
Thank you so much for writing that.
People reassuring always helps me to know
that I am fighting a battle that I can
win!!!
