As some of you may know, my sister is
bulimic and for a while now i've been
giving her money (my own money...I don't
earn but it's the money I get for
christmas or whatever) cos she claims that
while she was in new york during christmas
that her purse got stolen.
She doesn't want to tell my dad/mum (it
was their money) cos she thinks they'll
get really annoyed at her (which they
will) and at the moment she's meant to be
living off the excess from the money she
had from my dad for new york. I'm not
sure I believe that it got stolen...She
probably spent it on food or something but
do you think it's right for me to give her
money?
Basically, at the moment she's got no
money except what I give her, until she
gets next month's allowance. There's
only so much money I can give her...I'm 15
years old and I have one job which gives
hardly any pay cos i'm still at school
etc. The only money I have right now is
from presents.
Let me know your thoughts...Thank you
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 722
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Posted: 01-08-07 09:52am
Hi..
Maybe I wouldn't give her money if it was
me.. Because if I was suspicious of
anythng, like you are, I wouldn't think
that would be the best decision.. It
couls make her ask you again and then ask
you for more.. :s it's a tough one..
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neighbours
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Nov 2006 Posts: 363 Location: London
Posted: 01-08-07 10:28am
It is tough cos she asks my sister (ollie,
20) aswell...And previously she's actually
taken a large sum of money from my
sister's savings which she keeps in her
room. Also, if we try not to give her
money she bites our heads off. Like just
now actually, she came here (to our house,
she doesn't live here anymore) and wanted
money for lunch.
Ollie (other sister) gave her £4 - that's
enough for a supermarket lunch. Kate
(bulimic sister) said it wasn't but ollie
wouldn't give her anymore. She got
really angry and stormed out, slamming the
door.
It puts me and ollie in a difficult
position cos my parents would not be
pleased to know she's taking money from us
but if we tell them, then they'll tell
kate off and that'll get me and ollie into
trouble with kate for telling our parents.
Does that make any sense?
Anyway, ollie and kate's relationship
really isn't good cos kate thinks she's
really on my parents side which she
isn't...We both try to support kate as
much as we can but she still sees ollie as
this "evil" person cos she sometimes
refuses her money. Ollie sticks up for
kate so much when my parents are angry at
kate. I feel sorry for everyone in this
situation and I don't know who's more in
the right it's so confusing.
To be honest, kate's issue with food has
caused a lot of problems in my
family...And a lot of tension, hurt,
upset, money issues. There's nothing I
can do about it but it feels good to talk
to you guys on here, so thanks.
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 722
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Posted: 01-08-07 14:05pm
What do you think she wants this money
for? Can she be spending it in some sort
of addiction? :\
well.. When she asks you money to eat,
one thing that you can do it go lunch with
her and pay. This way, she'll be obliged
to do what she said she would (have lunch)
and your money will be paying it.
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neighbours
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Nov 2006 Posts: 363 Location: London
Posted: 01-08-07 14:33pm
Nah, food is her addiction. Two days ago
she took £20 from me and my sister...£10
each. That should at least have lasted 3
days but today she wants money again!
I can't go to lunch with her cos it just
disrupts my day...I shouldn't have to do
that anyway. Going to the supermarket
with my 23 year old sister...Accompanying
her, i'd feel like her carer or something
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 722
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Posted: 01-08-07 16:30pm
But at least she would be controlled...
You could do that for the sake of the time
with her, tell her that you want to spend
some time with her when you get the
chance. :\ not to really control her, but
to control her that time only.. Sometimes
it's better. Sometimes I wish I had
someone controlling me and not letting me
eat as much as I do...
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neighbours
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Nov 2006 Posts: 363 Location: London
Posted: 01-08-07 18:39pm
I guess so but to be honest...Hers and my
daily schedules dont really fit together
very neatly. She works, i'm at
school...It's tough to find the time for
that.
She'd still eat the same amount anyway, I
think it's more about the money but
anyway...
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v00d00cita
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 04 Mar 2006 Posts: 722
Thanks: 0
Thanked:4
Posted: 01-09-07 09:32am
good luck on that, then... I hope you
find another way of helping her without
those issues!
it's so confusing.
To be honest, kate's issue with food has
caused a lot of problems in my
family...And a lot of tension, hurt,
upset, money issues. There's nothing I
can do about it but it feels good to talk
to you guys on here, so thanks.
