Joined: 28 Jan 2007 Posts: 1 Location: North Dakota
I Just Broke Up With My Boyfriend of Nine Years, What Now? Posted: 01-28-07 09:47am
Hi. I'm new here and I just broke up with
my boyfriend. We were together for 9
years. My counselor and minister said I
it would be best to break up with him in
order to get better. He's an enabler and
controller. I'm bulimic and compulsive
spender so he enables me to stay sick (by
providing me food and money when I ask
him). And he's possessive. I got rid of
all my friends when we got serious because
he didn't like them. I have no friends
now. Over the years I developed social
phobia. I do have a my cat. I'm trying
to get well now with my other disorders I
mentioned (plus more). I don't want to
leave my house now though (except to the
counselor and store). My new ex lives
just 10 houses from me so it was so easy
to get to his house. Now I don't want to
go anywhere. But I have to. I started
college two weeks ago. Somehow I am
managing as long I see my counselor
regularly and take my medication every
day. Some days are really hard though. I
have two distant friends but we hardly
ever talk to each other. I'm soo lonely.
No one to watch movies with anymore or
laugh with. What should I do now? I'm
afraid to go out and explore. Any help
would be appreciated. Sorry so long.
|
RedDelight
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006 Posts: 131 Location: I'm a Yettie!
Re: I Just Broke Up With My Boyfriend of Nine Years, What No Posted: 01-31-07 09:24am
Welcome to ehealth- wildputycat!
Sorry to hear your news
i think it is good that you got him out of
your life- if he was just making you
worse..Then you need to cut out the bad
news..And you did just that. It's going
to feel weird at first, since you have
been around no one but him for 9 years.
That is not good, to have someone make you
change everything about you- cut you off
from the world. That was wrong of him to
do so. I am sure there is some type of
support group in your local area- for the
social phobia.. It will get better though
and at least you recongize this! You
can't stop living because he lives near
you! You have so many things I am sure
you missed out on, because of him.
Good that you are going to a counselor!
That is a positive step- that will
definity help you through this tough time
i'll be your
friend- pm me anytime- I know how you
feel. I had two relationships that were
horrid. At first, not so much.. Too
perfect, you know? Then bamn...Strange
thing is that I fell for the same type of
"lying salesman". Very controlling, and
verbally abusive. It's hard.. Because I
do reflect, as I am sure you do- in the
good times.. And do get lonely. It will
get better, you are doing the right thing.
Keep your head up, girl! I am here if
you need me anytime
-=red=-
somehow I am managing as long I see my
counselor regularly and take my medication
every day. Some days are really hard
though. I have two distant friends but
we hardly ever talk to each other. I'm
soo lonely. No one to watch movies with
anymore or laugh with. What should I do
now? I'm afraid to go out and explore.
Any help would be appreciated. Sorry so
long.[/quote]
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yogahoneybunny
Supporter
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 871 Location: Strumica, Macedonia
Thanks: 2
Thanked:0
Posted: 01-31-07 09:28am
Easy does it.
Just take it one day at a time. It
sounds like you've got your faith, so know
that things will work out. That's about
all that you can do right now. Over
time, things will improve.
|
DPantelones
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jan 2007 Posts: 141 Location: ,
Thanks: 0
Thanked:1
Get Out of the House, Off the Computer, And Go Socialize Posted: 01-31-07 18:59pm
Get out of the house when/if you can, meet
new people at church, libraries, social
events in your town, neighbors, old
friends, family members, anyone and
anywhere that you can feel comfortable and
meet new people to make friends with.
Avoid bars and things of that nature, you
don't want the drama and self loathing
that can come from that scene! Good
luck!
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Schizophreniahealth
This page was last updated on June 11, 2008
i'll be your
friend- pm me anytime- I know how you
feel. I had two relationships that were
horrid. At first, not so much.. Too
perfect, you know? Then bamn...Strange
thing is that I fell for the same type of
"lying salesman". Very controlling, and
verbally abusive. It's hard.. Because I
do reflect, as I am sure you do- in the
good times.. And do get lonely. It will
get better, you are doing the right thing.
Keep your head up, girl! I am here if
you need me anytime 
