Help ... Please Please Please.... Posted: 02-09-04 01:46am
Ok .. Here is my situation ... I broke
up with a guy that I have been living with
since 2000... He didnt want to marry me,
and in 4 years only took me to dinner 3
times... Blah blah ,you all know the
deal. So ... I move back to my hometown
and start seeing a guy that I had dated
back in high school ( not really dated...
But we were really good friends...Really
good friends ) .. Anyway... This guy
treats me like a total princess.. Takes
me out all the time and is totally sweet
to me..
Well.. So I start missing the first guy
and so I went to see him .... I dont even
know why... Cause things are the same ..
He doesnt want to do anything except smoke
and watch tv, but I still have some degree
of feelings for him .. Is this normal ?
I feel like im in love with two men. ...
I really want to be with the new guy..
But will the feelings for the old guy ever
go away ?????? I just dont want to end up
loosing the new guy for trying to work
things out with the old one... ( oh..
This is the 3rd time that we have broken
it off.. Um by the way...
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wilsam
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Feb 2004 Posts: 32 Location: England
Dating Posted: 02-13-04 08:42am
I think that you see the first guy as a
bit of a challenge and the second guy is
too nice.I had the same problem and went
with the nice guy and I still thought of
him but after a while he meant nothing to
me.Stick with the guy who treats you
best.Good luck.
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shannonwatts
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Dec 2003 Posts: 46 Location: charlotte, nc
Melibell Posted: 02-13-04 11:25am
I think it's normal to still have some
feelings over this guy, you were with him
for 4 years and not to mention living with
him. This is kind of a personal question,
but are you still sleeping with the old
guy? I dated a guy for about 3 years, we
broke up but we still would mess around
every once in awhile. I still felt like I
was in love with this loser. And then a
friend told me that as long as I kept
sleeping with him, I would never get over
him. I guess it's more of an emotional
thing for us as to a physical thing for
guys. Also it takes time. You two were
with each other for awhile, so it will
probably take awhile to get over him.
Wether you stay with the old or go with
the new, make sure your being treated the
way you deserve.
Good luck
shannon
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oopoopoop
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Mar 2004 Posts: 1515 Location: ,
Thanks: 78
Thanked:5
Posted: 04-25-04 18:40pm
So you are bored by the guy who treats you
well, and want the guy who treats you
badly? This is a classic self-esteem
problem. Subconsciously we are attracted
to people who treat us the way we feel we
deserve. Many many many women ends up
with men who are jerks, and a lot of the
time they somehow *need* to be treated
badly. It can also makes you feel like
you are in control, because someone who is
too keen can make you feel trapped.
Have a think about what you want from a
relationship and from your life. And from
yourself. What do you get from each of
these men? Quite possibly, neither is
right for you. You need to understand
yourself first.
