tinkinpink84
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Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
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Depressed
Posted: 02-10-07 15:32pm
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Maybe it is still post partum I dunno, I
just feel depressed and feel like crying
and I really dont know why, I was fine
earlier. Me and my friend were supposed
to havea girls night but I just dont feel
like doing anything, jason was asking how
long post partum depression lasts, I guess
hoping one day I snap out of it and act
normal. Then iwas just sitting on the
couch and hes like are u still in that
depressed mood, I asked why first then his
answer was because its bringing me the
f**k down. So I didnt bother answerin
him, then evidently im annoying him by
just staring at the wall. Or at nothing
in particular. He asked if I needed to go
to the drs, didnt bother answering that
either because its not like I can get to
the dr, we only have one car , he hasnt
even filled out the stuff for the
insurance claim on my car at all, I
started it but he has to do the rest I
dunno all the info. I dont even know that
hes gonna be getting off to take the kids
to get there shots tuesday. So me tryin
to get an appt would be pointless. I dont
know if I will be able to go to my post
partum checkup either, I gave him the
dates last week so he could get em off and
he hasnt yet. When ive been to the drs
for colds and stuff they have a paper u
fill out asking previous medical history
etc. I check the box that says ive
suffered from depresion in the past. They
have one that askes have u felt hopeless
in the past 2 weeks, checked yes. The drs
never bother reading those I guess cuz
they never asked about it, but I dont feel
like talking to the stupid military drs on
base nor do I wanna see a therapist but
there only problem solver is to shove meds
down your throat. I just I dunno it
suckes being depressed cuz I hate feeling
like this but then it also seems to annoy
jason. But ugh he doesnt even help out at
all, even on the weekends he doesnt, he
goes to bed at 9 during the week and 10 on
the weekend. So im stuck till 3am with a
screaming baby then gotta beup early with
joseph while hes still in bed. Then he
acts like I shouldnt be tired, hes like
what are you tired or something , duh I
dont even go in the room until jordynnes
asleep so I dont bother him,. I asked him
twice to give joseph a bath before he went
to bed cuz he got dinner in his hair, well
I ended up giving joseph a bath and well
he watched jordynne. But it seems like he
gets annoyed when she cries so im hesitant
to leave him with her when shes cranky and
stuff. So pretty much depresed and no one
to talk to . No help whatsoever with the
kids . Everything just makes it that much
more worse and I hate it.
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tinkinpink84
Moderator
Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
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Thanked:6
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Posted: 02-10-07 15:41pm
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Ugh he knows im depressed and went to drop
his friends off and just called to ask if
I had a problem with him drinkin tonight I
told him didnt care and hung up  I cant handle this
he called me back cuz I keep hanging up on
him, now hes blaming me for him wanting to
get drunk because I was depressed and
didnt wanna go to my friends tonight. But
now hes gonna be home and it will be even
more miserable since I bring him down.
Its likea no win situation either way im
miserable
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alexa84
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 May 2006
Posts: 654
Location: The Good Ole Alabama
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Posted: 02-10-07 16:23pm
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Im sorry you feel depressed. I was
severly depressed before pregnancy. I had
to take 60mg of cymbalta! I had to quit
it during pregnancy but it wasnt that bad.
Then as soon as I had her. I was crying
about everything while I was in the
hospital. If she cried, puked,
anything...I cried!! Before I left the
hospital, my doctor perscribed me
lexapro(sp?). I have no appatite and I
fight wth joey constantly. He ignores me
all the time!! He says 'huh' or 'what' to
eveything I say. And sometimes I have to
say his name twice to get his freaking
attention!! Oh and he also health forum
about getting no sleep but yet he slept
throught half my effing labor!!!! He has
had more sleep than me for the past week!!
Everything he does, it angers me off!
And he seems to be doing it on purpose.
What im trying to say is.....Your not the
only one going through this. It sucks but
hopefuly it all gets better. For me and
you both 
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tinkinpink84
Moderator
Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
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Posted: 02-10-07 16:39pm
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I just hate how he states its my fault im
depressed and its my fault I dont know how
to deal with it oh and its myparents fault
as well too, sorry I had a not so great
childhood and my parents made me feel
hated, but he knows my whole history. All
he can do is call me a psycho b***h and an
problem. So yeah that just makes me so
much happier ugh I just I cant stand doing
this all the time I hate feeling like id
rather be dead then this miserable.
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lil_blaze2004
Supporter
Joined: 29 Oct 2004
Posts: 6492
Location: ,
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Posted: 02-10-07 16:51pm
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Diane if you want my honest opnion. I
thikn you should pack yourself and the
kids up and head home. Honestly.
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tdr
Supporter
Joined: 05 Oct 2006
Posts: 1535
Location: Somewhere else...not here., PA USA
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Posted: 02-10-07 16:53pm
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| lil_blaze2004
wrote: | | diane if you want my honest
opnion. I thikn you should pack
yourself and the kids up and head home.
Honestly. |
my thoughts exactly. You are the mother
of his children, .Diane, and he has
absoloutley no right to treat you that
way. You're too good for him.
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tinkinpink84
Moderator
Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
Thanks: 3
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Posted: 02-10-07 17:19pm
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| tdr
wrote: | | lil_blaze2004
wrote: | | diane if you want my honest
opnion. I thikn you should pack
yourself and the kids up and head home.
Honestly. |
my thoughts exactly. You are the mother
of his children, .Diane, and he has
absoloutley no right to treat you that
way. You're too good for
him. |
yeah bt then he says hes gonna get the
kids, hes gonna say that im inasne or
something and make sure that he gets
custody of them. He ugh I dont even know
what to say anymore
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ladylee70
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2006
Posts: 1912
Location: Boise, Idaho,
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Posted: 02-10-07 17:25pm
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I am so sorry that everything is happening
to you. You really need some extra
support. Do you have other support there?
It sounds like you do have some friends.
What do they say about everything??
I have read so much about him and I am
very concerned for you. I hope this
doesn't sound mean but I would be
depressed too if I had to experience
everything completely alone and some of
the other emotional stuff you are dealing
with him. I deal with some things with my
husband, but it's due to mental health
issues.
Is there a possibility of packing up and
moving back home, even if just
temporarily. Would that be financially
possible? Would you have support from
family?
Please take care of yourself.
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tinkinpink84
Moderator
Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
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Posted: 02-10-07 17:31pm
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Its not even financially possible anymore
since he wrecked my car. I havea friend
who knows how he is, ive beentalkin to her
on yahoo since it costs money to even call
localy here. Thats the only person ihave
really, cant talk to him it does no good
or bad, it does nothing
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Magical Logic
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Mar 2006
Posts: 2248
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Posted: 02-10-07 21:07pm
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Diane I think you should call his company
commander and tell him how he treats you.
I bet he will striaghten up quick!
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Sandbox Party
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Jul 2006
Posts: 7276
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Posted: 02-10-07 21:11pm
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Guys telling her to run from her problems
isnt going to solve anything.
D... You need to sit down and have a
serious talk with him.. Tell him
*exactly* how you feel, and then tell him
if he doesnt change, your living
situation will. dont just up and
take off. Remember those babies need a
daddy too, even *if* hes immature and
inconsiderate.
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Magical Logic
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Mar 2006
Posts: 2248
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Posted: 02-10-07 21:13pm
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The last time she had a problem with him
she said she talked to him. I think she
has gave him fair warning to start acting
right.
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Bridget
Moderator
Joined: 27 Jan 2006
Posts: 10814
Location: ,
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Posted: 02-10-07 21:15pm
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| tinkinpink84
wrote: |
yeah bt then he says hes gonna get the
kids, hes gonna say that im inasne or
something and make sure that he gets
custody of them. He ugh I dont even
know what to say
anymore |
he's bluffing so you'll stay. If he
can't be bothered with the kids now then
why would he want full custody?
Last edited by Bridget on 02-11-07 10:11am; edited 1 time in total
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tinkinpink84
Moderator
Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
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Posted: 02-11-07 07:33am
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He toldme we had jordynne because I wanted
another kid so I guess he lied when he
told me he wanted another baby too. Makes
me feel bad for her that he never wanted
her . When you agree to have kids its
amutual agreement from waht I understood
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lil_blaze2004
Supporter
Joined: 29 Oct 2004
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Posted: 02-11-07 11:12am
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I'm not trying to be mean but people who
complain about the same thing constantly
and do nothing about it drive me nuts.
Sit him down and tell him "you have x
amount of time to shape up or i'm gone"
they will not give him custody of the kids
as he lives in a diff couuunry right now.
Get your stuff in order, see what kind of
help you can get and do something instead
of complaining about him all the time.
Go into counseling,.Something.
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tigresacanela24
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Nov 2005
Posts: 5261
Location: Treat your children well, eventually they'll choose your nursing home.
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Posted: 02-11-07 11:30am
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Wow, diane. This is an ongoing issue
with this guy. I'm not trying to be a
b*tch but he sounds like an @ss. Men are
always stupid and selfish but he takes the
cake. I don't even know what advice to
give because i'm beginning to think that I
need to leave my husband. He's a person
and he's selfish. Honestly I think that
if I had more money that I would have left
him already.
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tinkinpink84
Moderator
Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
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Posted: 02-11-07 12:13pm
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Yeah, financially impossible to leave
right now but man im contemplating it when
my parents get here, I try and talk to him
but it ends up in an argument instead of a
talk and then hes like im saying the same
crap over and over, well duh he hasnt
changed anything for me to bring up
anything else. Although today he was
being nice, he watched the kids and my
friends while we went tothe gym and worked
out and went to the commisary and the px.
Hes giving joseph a bath now too. So I
dunno blah
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Magical Logic
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Mar 2006
Posts: 2248
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Posted: 02-11-07 12:19pm
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There are ways for you to leave if you
really wanted to.
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Ingi
Supporter
Joined: 09 Mar 2006
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Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
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Posted: 02-11-07 12:34pm
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He is in the army, right? You can leave.
And it will not be a problem. He cannot
get custody by 'saying' something about
you being a 'bad parent'. There are
courts that require proof of cases where
it is he-said/she-said issues. In fact,
that is what a court of law is for when it
comes to divorce and child custody.
You would only need to speak with his .C.O
to get things to change.
I understand you are hurting right now.
You are a long way from home and have very
little support and just had a baby. Of
course you would feel down! You need to
take a pro-active approach to what is
going on though.
Get yourself together - you cannot make
someone else help (even parent). Get as
much of a schedule down as you can and
figure out what you are willing to put up
with in your relationship and what you
absolutely will not tolerate. Then go
from there.
Good luck!
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tinkinpink84
Moderator
Joined: 11 Sep 2006
Posts: 5065
Location: , Germany
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Posted: 02-11-07 16:34pm
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I know he cant do much other then say
things but, in the past I used to have an
eating disorder and cut myself so I have
scars on my arm and he is trying to use
that against me. But all in all we just
need like a sitter to go out and talk
about things cuz we never seem to get
talking done at the house. Ive been
hanging out and working out with my
friend, wich excersize helps with
depression so its a good thing, im
thinking about when I go to get birth
control I will ask about the depression
thing/ im callin the clinic tomorow to ask
about if I can get bc tuesday even though
my post partum checkup is on friday im
past 6 weeks post partum already just had
to reschedule my checkup since I dont have
my car. But tues we will be at the clinic
for the kids shots so I wanna be able to
get my stuff done then too so we wont have
to worry about trying to get off to get
back to the dr again so soon . I dont
even know when I will get my car back ,
jasons still doing the paperwork and dumb
me when they asked ifi needed a rental car
told em no cuz we have hubbys car. So
oopsie but jason doesnt know about that or
hed kill me. He wants me to learn to
drive his car and keeps gettin gmad cuz I
dont want to and it starts an argument etc
he has a stick shift but its really old a
91 and german and the numbers arent even
on the knob. I drove it about as far as
the gate and we had it in neutral and I
went to go and put it in reverse twice so
I freaked out and told him to drive and
had my foot on the break the entire time.
The gate guy was laughing at me. But that
is why I dont wanna learn in his car. I
just want my car so im able to do
something, just sitting here doesnt help
the depression at all.
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