Joined: 28 Jun 2006 Posts: 30 Location: Windsor, Canada
Needed to Vent Posted: 02-11-07 00:33am
I am pro-choice, but when my friend told
me she was going to have abortion. My
first reaction was to ask her why. Her
reason was not because she did not want
anymore children or because she didn't
want to raise another child by herself.
No it was because her parents told her
they would not have anything to do with
her if she didn't have it done. I told
after she has the abortion done she would
have to look herself in the face. She
told me was going to get it done. I gave
her a big hug and made sure she now what
was going to happen to her during the
whole thing and wised her luck. When she
came back form the hospital she was so
angry and she told hated
me for not stopping her. Not like I could
make that choice for her. Me and her have
not talk since.
I just need to get this out of my head.
Thanks from
mother_without_child
p.S if you like to vent with me or add
comments please do.
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 02-11-07 02:42am
I can understand the desire to ask "why"?
It's an obvious question in anyone's
mind... What I don't understand is your
friend's reaction; because even after
giving your opinion on the matter, which
was quite against her desicion, you gave
her your support. She did it on her own.
She was probably just frustrated and
upset; as one can easily expect a young
woman to be in this situation - and needed
to vent, to "blame" someone besides
herself, and that happened to be you.
Please, try to get in contact with her; I
think she probably needs a good friend at
this time in her life. You are a good
friend
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Sunflower_pie81
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Jan 2006 Posts: 5041 Location: to hell with this crap
Posted: 02-11-07 23:49pm
Love, if someone has their minds made up
about having an abortion you cannot really
'talk them out of it.' in the situation
that she was in, being pushed out of her
family, you most likely couldnt' have
talked her out if it. Sadly, she
realized after it was done, her parents
most likely woudn't have abandon her and
she wished she could take it back. I
know I did.
I beg you to try to talk to her and let
you know that you are there because this
is a very hard time for her to go thru
alone. She is most likely going thru it
alone and needs someone there by her side.
You were an understanding friend, wether
you agreed or not, so now go be by her and
show her the support you showed hre in the
beginning.
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Mother_Without_Child
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Jun 2006 Posts: 30 Location: Windsor, Canada
Posted: 02-12-07 21:40pm
Thank you guys I will go and see how she
is doing sometime this week. "as one can
easily expect a young woman to be in this
situation" she is not a young woman she is
34 years old. I just dont know what to
say to her. I know she is not by herself
the babys father is now back in the
picture and she has a 9 year old son. How
asked her "when the baby is 16 and ask why
you gave it away what are you going to say
to them" and she will not explain what she
did to him... And also told the father
she was going to miscarry and the doctor
said it would be better for her to have a
abortion done. Total bs.
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 02-13-07 09:04am
mother_without_child
wrote:
thank you guys I will go and
see how she is doing sometime this week.
"as one can easily expect a young woman to
be in this situation" she is not a young
woman she is 34 years old. I just dont
know what to say to her. I know she is
not by herself the babys father is now
back in the picture and she has a 9 year
old son. How asked her "when the baby is
16 and ask why you gave it away what are
you going to say to them" and she will not
explain what she did to him... And also
told the father she was going to miscarry
and the doctor said it would be better for
her to have a abortion done. Total
bs.
i don't think it's bs... And it is
entirely up to her to tell her son when
he's old enough )or anyone else for that
matter)! He doesn't have a "right" to
know; this was a private matter and a
privte desicion that his mother made, it's
none of his business, or anyone else's.
No one has a "right" to know why she did
it; it was her choice. My mother told me
last year (i'm 22) about her abortion that
she'd had in college, and I have nothing
but respect for her in regards to the
desicion.
and she told hated
me for not stopping her. Not like I could
make that choice for her. Me and her have
not talk since.
