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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Is the Joke On Me?
Posted: 02-24-07 02:11am
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So I met this guy in December and we had
sex a couple days after meeting. This was
a bit of a mistake since it set our
friendship off on the wrong foot. I was
confused about the whole thing and we
talked it out. We decided to stay friends
and I guess have a casual fling. This guy
is a lot more experienced than I am and is
several years older.
I haven't seen in face to face since we
had sex but we have talked on the phone
and on-line. He's always the one who's
setting up dates and asking when he can
see me. But he's always the one who ends
up breaking those dates and standing me
up. I was supposed to see him yesterday
and tomorrow. He cancelled last night
because he's got a fever and he's
cancelling tomorrow because he didn't work
today and has to work tomorrow.
So basically... am I being played here? I
honestly don't know what to do. I'm
thinking of breaking it off but I don't
want to but I know if I don't it'll just
be worse.
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RedDelight
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006
Posts: 131
Location: I'm a Yettie!
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Re: Is the Joke On Me?
Posted: 02-28-07 16:30pm
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| forever16
wrote: | So I met this guy in
December and we had sex a couple days
after meeting. This was a bit of a mistake
since it set our friendship off on the
wrong foot. I was confused about the whole
thing and we talked it out. We decided to
stay friends and I guess have a casual
fling. This guy is a lot more experienced
than I am and is several years older.
I haven't seen in face to face since we
had sex but we have talked on the phone
and on-line. He's always the one who's
setting up dates and asking when he can
see me. But he's always the one who ends
up breaking those dates and standing me
up. I was supposed to see him yesterday
and tomorrow. He cancelled last night
because he's got a fever and he's
cancelling tomorrow because he didn't work
today and has to work tomorrow.]
So basically... am I being played here? I
honestly don't know what to do. I'm
thinking of breaking it off but I don't
want to but I know if I don't it'll just
be worse. |
Howdy 
It sounds like he wants a friend with
"benefits" if you ask me.. and in a way--
unless you agree with it-- that is a form
of being "played." Do you truely enjoy
this relationship? You say he's
older...should be old enough to quit with
this nonsense! Be at the very least-
civil. You are thinking of breaking it
off for a reason-- and you need to trust
your instinct. There are plenty of fishes
out there, why waste more time on this
one?
He's cancelled twice.. if you like- set
one more time up. If he cancels- third
strike your out! Thereare tons of people
in need of friends.. and he doesn't quiet
fit the "friend" description if you ask
me. Sounds like a Sex Guzzler if you ask
me! 
Good luck in your decision-- it comes down
to what *you* feel *you* want &
diserve!! don't settle!!
-=Reds=-
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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Posted: 02-28-07 18:45pm
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It was a "friends with benefits"
relationship with us. He had no time for a
serious relationship and I needed to
concentrate on school.
And thanks for the advice! I ended things
with him a couple nights ago.
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RedDelight
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006
Posts: 131
Location: I'm a Yettie!
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Posted: 03-05-07 10:54am
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| forever16
wrote: | It was a "friends with
benefits" relationship with us. He had no
time for a serious relationship and I
needed to concentrate on school.
And thanks for the advice! I ended things
with him a couple nights ago. |
You just made me smile Which is a
challenge in itself-- but bravo girl!!
that is awsome!
I hope things are better for you now!
-=Reds=-
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DPantelones
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jan 2007
Posts: 141
Location: ,
Thanks: 0
Thanked:1
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Posted: 03-05-07 14:01pm
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Man could I ever use a "friends with
benefits" type of relationship right about
now...how does a guy approach a woman with
that proposition?? How do women these
days take to that?
I know, it's been a long while since I've
been "sniffing around", any advice is
appreciated!
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RedDelight
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006
Posts: 131
Location: I'm a Yettie!
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Posted: 03-05-07 14:34pm
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| DPantelones
wrote: | Man could I ever use a
"friends with benefits" type of
relationship right about now...how does a
guy approach a woman with that
proposition?? How do women these days
take to that?
I know, it's been a long while since I've
been "sniffing around", any advice is
appreciated! |
"Sniffin' around.." .N.I.C.E ! Haha!! I
*love* how you put that!!
Hum... well go to a bar/club. Those types
usually hang out there. I'd be up front..
I am sure there are woman out there that
would love a free hump with no
commitment.
I am going to get in trouble for this one-
oh well! It's the truth!!
-=Reds=-
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change is good
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 112
Location: Mesa AZ.,
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Posted: 03-05-07 14:46pm
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i hear alot obout these friends " with
benefits" and think it's the way to go if
you are not ready to commit
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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Posted: 03-06-07 14:28pm
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| MissDepressed
wrote: | | forever16
wrote: | It was a "friends with
benefits" relationship with us. He had no
time for a serious relationship and I
needed to concentrate on school.
And thanks for the advice! I ended things
with him a couple nights ago. |
You just made me smile Which is a
challenge in itself-- but bravo girl!!
that is awsome!
I hope things are better for you now!
-=Reds=- |
It was a "friends with benefits"
relationship with us. He had no time for a
serious relationship and I needed to
concentrate on school.
And thanks for the advice! I ended things
with him a couple nights ago.
Thanks, its been a tough week. But I'll
survive. lol
| DPantelones
wrote: | Man could I ever use a
"friends with benefits" type of
relationship right about now...how does a
guy approach a woman with that
proposition?? How do women these days
take to that?
I know, it's been a long while since I've
been "sniffing around", any advice is
appreciated! |
It was just a spontaneous thing. We never
really said we were friends with benefits
but it was understood by both of us. The
only reason why it happened was because we
had sex in the beginning of our friendship
and it just complicated things. We then
talked and he said that he had no time for
a girlfriend (nor does he have anytime
with anyone else other than his right hand
). Then it went on from their. We both
wanted sex, etc.
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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Posted: 03-10-07 01:20am
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missdepressed, you're going to be
disappointed in me. He called me today and
wanted a second chance. I was reluctant
but I agreed.
Stupid of me?
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change is good
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 112
Location: Mesa AZ.,
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Posted: 03-10-07 11:54am
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i don't think it's stupid of you as long
as you have no hopes for a relationship
with this guy. if you are okay just having
sex than it's not stupid. if you are
thinking or hoping he will change or it
will be different then i think it's stupid
to be with him. just be honest with
yourself. you can't change anyone but
yourself.
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RedDelight
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006
Posts: 131
Location: I'm a Yettie!
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Jigga-wha?
Posted: 03-11-07 00:47am
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| forever16
wrote: | missdepressed, you're going
to be disappointed in me. He called me
today and wanted a second chance. I was
reluctant but I agreed.
Stupid of me? |
Howdy, forever16
Disappointed- in a choice you wanted to
make? Heck no! Forced into? Then of
course, I would be. But you weren't. At the end of it-
you are the one that has to make a
choice--for what you want! You can take
advice-- and not always have to follow it.
But...the fact that it is in the back of
your head, and you will know what to do-
if the situation turns sour...then it was
all worth it.
I hope everything works out well- and if
for some odd reason it doesn't- you know
what needs to be done. Sometimes you
don't know what you got, until it's gone.
As cheesy as it is, coming from a counting
crows song- it's very true!
And while we are quoting songs--- keep
this for thought- "Your my lover, not my
life." Sounds a tad brutal- but Boy
George is right!
Take care & keep me updated, girl!
-=RedHots=-
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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Re: Jigga-wha?
Posted: 03-11-07 04:16am
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Runner83
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Mar 2007
Posts: 4
Location: Melbourne
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Is the Joke On Me?
Posted: 03-11-07 22:43pm
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hi there,
this guy sounds like a typical player
which is fine if you are being a player in
this situation too. sex has such a grip
over people and if thats all that you want
out of it i would probably agree that it
is ok to carry on with it. but it also
sounds that he clearly has the upper hand
in the situation and maybe does not have a
lot of respect for you and others? i may
be wrong of course.
it is good that you were strong about it
and told him it was over and its totally
ok that you took him back but there prob
should be some changes otherwise you will
keep going around in circles with this
guy. do you have any feelings for him at
all? if you do then it sounds destructive
bc it seems he may not have feelings for
you.
is there a future here? prob not? do you
want to have sex with him that badly?
there are plenty of people to have sex
with.
good luck
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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Re: Is the Joke On Me?
Posted: 03-13-07 03:01am
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| Runner83
wrote: | hi there,
this guy sounds like a typical player
which is fine if you are being a player in
this situation too. sex has such a grip
over people and if thats all that you want
out of it i would probably agree that it
is ok to carry on with it. but it also
sounds that he clearly has the upper hand
in the situation and maybe does not have a
lot of respect for you and others? i may
be wrong of course.
it is good that you were strong about it
and told him it was over and its totally
ok that you took him back but there prob
should be some changes otherwise you will
keep going around in circles with this
guy. do you have any feelings for him at
all? if you do then it sounds destructive
bc it seems he may not have feelings for
you.
is there a future here? prob not? do you
want to have sex with him that badly?
there are plenty of people to have sex
with.
good luck |
Basically we're playing each other. He
wants sex, I want sex. But the only we
can't seem to work out is our schedules.
He's a busy guy, works for the city and
usually works from 12pm to 8pm. But we're
trying to make it work. I'm seriously
deprived right now.
 
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RedDelight
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006
Posts: 131
Location: I'm a Yettie!
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Re: Is the Joke On Me?
Posted: 03-13-07 14:34pm
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| forever16
wrote: | | Runner83
wrote: | hi there,
this guy sounds like a typical player
which is fine if you are being a player in
this situation too. sex has such a grip
over people and if thats all that you want
out of it i would probably agree that it
is ok to carry on with it. but it also
sounds that he clearly has the upper hand
in the situation and maybe does not have a
lot of respect for you and others? i may
be wrong of course.
it is good that you were strong about it
and told him it was over and its totally
ok that you took him back but there prob
should be some changes otherwise you will
keep going around in circles with this
guy. do you have any feelings for him at
all? if you do then it sounds destructive
bc it seems he may not have feelings for
you.
is there a future here? prob not? do you
want to have sex with him that badly?
there are plenty of people to have sex
with.
good luck |
Basically we're playing each other. He
wants sex, I want sex. But the only we
can't seem to work out is our schedules.
He's a busy guy, works for the city and
usually works from 12pm to 8pm. But we're
trying to make it work. I'm seriously
deprived right now.
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Two words: Super Dildo!
Great investment 
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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Re: Is the Joke On Me?
Posted: 03-14-07 00:41am
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RedDelight
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Oct 2006
Posts: 131
Location: I'm a Yettie!
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Re: Is the Joke On Me?
Posted: 03-14-07 08:20am
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But it's still fun!!!
Woooo!
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saz89
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 12
Location: northeast england
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Posted: 03-15-07 05:40am
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hey love!you need to turn your attitude
around to this situation.
you cant just think right he likes me and
this is all genuine OR he is playing me he
is a tosser!
you need to think deeper and you have to
remember you my darling are a woman!
you obviously like him or you would have
binned him by now and people saying chuck
him your not really going to do or be
satisfied you want to hold on incase there
is a chance. but you also don't want to
look or feel like a fool.
so this is where you need to test/play
with him a little. think of what hes
attracted to, what he likes about you or
other women, dont be too keen.
why don't you play it all cool for a a
little while. meanwhile sex your self up
get shopping get your hair and nails done,
feel beautiful and get that confidence!you
need to be in control you need to feel
your doing him the favor even just
chatting to him online or on the phone
don't make your self so available but be
careful not to be arrogant with this.
do a little research does he have others
like you? Get gorgeous and casually bump
into him in the street, i say casual but
youll need to plan it (SECRETLY) then say
a quick hello hows it going and " dash of
to meet friends" if he is messing you
around hell think wow she isn't just all
over me and wow shes got hotter. if he
does genuinly like you but is busy hell
think wow shes looking more amazing than
ever and maybe shes moving on i need to
act fast.
either way you should find out exacly how
he feels.
the worst that can happen is that he will
see you and not be bothered ,he might be a
jerk but then youll know still holding
your pride!
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forever16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76
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Posted: 03-29-07 14:53pm
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*sigh*
I'm sick of it. I'm ending things with
him.
I want to thank you all for the advice
that you've given me! THANKS a whole
bunch!
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