Would you get back with your ex if your current girlfriend/wife/fiance if your ex treated you better?
yes
50%
[ 1 ]
no
50%
[ 1 ]
Total Votes : 2
Author
Message
ARockyRelationship
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Feb 2007 Posts: 3 Location: California
Is It Worth It? Posted: 03-01-07 15:17pm
Ok, so I have to issues pertaining to the
above question. One is about my current
relationship, another is about a possible
relationship.
The first problem I have is my current
relationship. I love this girl (or at
least I'm pretty sure I do). She accepts
me for who I am, everything that I am.
Except that sometimes I put up with so
much (sorry to use the word, but) caca
with her. There are arguments that are
usually caused by her questioning
something about me. There are things that
I don't want to do (I know, sacrifices and
such for relationships), but things really
aren't worth it for me to do. Such as
today's example, she's supposed to go to a
play for extra credit, and plays simply
bore me. Well, I don't have any reason to
go, other than to be there with her. I
think it's a waste of my time, and she
flipped out when I told her I didn't
really want to go. And then she goes on to
tell me I'll let her do stuff alone, but
not anyone else. Of course, she could only
think of one example when I'd done that,
and I didn't even do it.
I really don't know if being with a person
that accepts you for everything is worth
it if you have to put up with all this
caca. Is it?
My second thing is that the day draws
nearer to when I get to see my ex again
(my ex girlfriend. My current relationship
is just a girlfriend as well. Never been
married, never been engaged, never been
even close). Well, my ex and I left each
other on good terms, and with a promise
that we'd get back together if we didn't
have anyone at the end of college. Well,
me and my current girlfriend are meeting
her in about two weeks (if my current gf
and I are still together).
My girlfriend is afraid I'll have feelings
for my ex and go back to her. To tell you
the truth though, so am I. My relationship
with my ex was, to say the least, exactly
what I want right now. It wasn't back when
I was dating my ex, but I look at the
relationship with her, and it's exactly
what I want right now. So, pertaining to
the question above, is it worth it to stay
in this (yeah, again) shitty relationship
where I get yelled at when I have an
option of a girl who will treat me so much
better?
Some people have told me I'm just looking
for an easy way out, but honestly, at this
point I'd much rather have my ex. I know
it sounds wrong, and I've told my
girlfriend that as much as I don't think
I'll get back together with my ex, things
do happen in the real world. (My friend
told me the other day that I'm a realist
and my girlfriend is a romantic, for the
fact that she usually can't accept the
real world.) An example: we've broken up 4
times now, and every time I come back
because she's so hurt and tells me "we
can't be over". So, this girl won't even
let me break up with her. I enjoy her
company, but I don't think I can put up
with everything for the rest of my life.
Anyway, sorry it's so long. Please, I need
help. If you can give advice on just one
part, it'd be appreciated.
|
DPantelones
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jan 2007 Posts: 141 Location: ,
Thanks: 0
Thanked:1
Posted: 03-05-07 13:54pm
Like others who've read through this post,
I don't really get what you're looking
for. The poll is worded wrong and is
confusing. Are you asking people if their
current love interest treated them better,
would you cheat? Or if your past love
interest treated you better than your
current? Please clarify.
In your post you address many things, and
to me it sounds like you really don't love
this person. You don't go places with her
because you have no interest in the
place(s) or her? See, this is what she's
feeling (your lack of interest) I believe.
She accepts you for who you are now, but
she'll get tired of your crap eventually.
You need to decide what it is you want and
get off your butt and make it happen.
Feelings may get hurt in the process, but
hey, we're all adults and need to do the
right thing for the right reason.
I hope that makes sense, and I hope it's
helpful.
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LennonLove
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 May 2007 Posts: 5 Location: Pennsylvania
Posted: 05-04-07 12:08pm
To be quite honest with you, you're in
this relationship because you're
comfortable and it's convenient. At least
that's what it sounds like to me. Women
aren't dumb, it's a thing called
intuition. She sees your lack of interest
and motivation to make the relationship
better. You're acting completely selfish
by not supporting the things she likes to
do. If you really loved her, you'd do
these things to make her happy. Like i'm
sure she would do for you. So, of course
she's going to ask you questions and get
frustrated. Any human would. In the back
of your mind you know she deserves better
and you obviously don't want to be that
better person for her. So instead of
keeping her hanging on until your two
weeks is up to see if the ''grass is
greener on the other side'', you need to
be fair and let her go. As far as you
being a realist, that's quite hard to
believe. You're living in a dream, man. If
you saw the reality, you'd realize what's
best for her and yourself. Obviously you
should man up and tell her exactly what's
going on inside that head of yours.
Communication is the key. Something you
seem to lack, apparently. Stop being
selfish and let her know the deal. I'm
sorry if this message comes off a little
harsh, but you're an adult. You're acting
childish and selfish as far as i can tell.
Good Luck though.
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Willa Weintraub
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Mar 2007 Posts: 3399 Location: The Beach!
Thanks: 30
Thanked:46
Posted: 05-04-07 13:02pm
If your thinking about leaving her for
your ex,obviously you think you would be
happier with her and you feel that there
is a chance you will leave.if your not
happy in this relationship then get
out.she can't make you stay in it because
"it can't be over".if she says that then
tell her to get over it.would you still
feel this way about leaving your gf if
your ex wasn't coming around?
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DPantelones
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jan 2007 Posts: 141 Location: ,
Thanks: 0
Thanked:1
Posted: 05-07-07 18:20pm
Just remember, the grass isn't always
greener. Relationships need work,
communication AND love...if you're lacking
in one of these areas, as in you're not
putting yourself out there completely,
then you may not have any luck with your
new honey or an ex or anyone! Check
yourself out first before being rash,
don't just follow your heart all the time.
I'm just sayin'..
