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marissacooper
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Apr 2007
Posts: 1
Location: uk
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Lost Virginity Questions Please Help!!
Posted: 04-19-07 16:21pm
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hey
i din't bleed when i lost my virginity, is
this possible? my boyfriend doesn't
believe i was a virgin before, and also
says that i am not as "tight" as i should
be, which he says is the way to tell if i
am faithful ( which i am) he thinks that
if a girl doesn't have sex for a while the
muscles in your vagina tighten up or
something. i also wondered because he's
circumsised is it harder for him to feel
anything? thanks for any help anyone can
provide  
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sillyakchick
Supporter
Joined: 12 Apr 2007
Posts: 2712
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Thanked:1
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Posted: 04-19-07 16:27pm
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I think perhaps it is time to find a more
significant other thatn this one. 
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Llewellyn
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2007
Posts: 1743
Location: NY
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Posted: 04-19-07 16:48pm
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Of course it is possible to not bleed when
you lose your virginity. Some people do
bleed, but that's not the norm. Why would
it be? Sex is something your body wants
to do. It's your body's purpose. Your
body does not want it to be awful,
painful, and bloody. The whole "sex
should be painful and bloody your first
time" thing is a myth.
Also, being tight or loose does not mean
what he thinks it means. The vagina can
seem tighter or looser depending on how in
the mood the woman is. The vagina doubles
in size when the woman is in the mood.
Usually, men who are circumcised do lose a
bit of the sensitivity that uncircumcised
men have.
Honestly, your boyfriend sounds like he
needs some serious sex education.
Personally, I am not sure if I would want
to be having sex with someone who not only
does not know what they are talking about,
but also makes accusations of cheating.
It sounds there are serious trust issues,
and he's filling your head with absolute
garbage when it comes to sex and your own
anatomy!
Here are some sites that you can look at
if you want to know more about sex and
anatomy:
http://www.coolnurse
.com/sex_faqs_index.htm
http://www.coolnurse.com/hyme
n.htm
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005
Posts: 12984
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
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Posted: 04-19-07 16:49pm
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| sillyakchick
wrote: | | I think perhaps it is time
to find a more significant other thatn
this one. |
Stupid comment.
marissa, your boyfriend is also ignorant
if he believes that every woman bleeds
when she looses her virginity.
The fact is, most women loose their hymen
(the skin that breaks and bleeds sometimes
during a woman's first sexual encounter,
and what supposedly signifies that she is
a virgin) long before they have sex.
Sports, bikes, horeback riding, and a
dozen other activities can cause a young
girl's hymen to rip.
You may also have been born without one.
Personally, I only had a thin string of
skin that counted as my hymen. It did not
break on my first sexual encounter; it
didn't break until a year later. Catching
it against the top of the penis during sex
was incredibly painful, but that normally
happened only on accident. Other than
that, my hymen did not interfere with sex
and it certainly didn't break the first
time.
Most women do not bleed their first time.
Most hymens are already broken. This
doesn't mean she's not a virgin, it means
she just doesn't have a hymen.
Your boyfriend needs to know this; I
suggest you show him this forum and my
reply so he knows what's actually up with
a woman's body.
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Georgia59
Supporter
Joined: 11 Apr 2007
Posts: 5557
Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
Thanks: 90
Thanked:32
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Posted: 04-20-07 11:30am
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Your boyfriend doesn't sound very
sensitive. I never bled from sex. It's
perfectly normal. And some women are just
larger then others, being 'tight' isn't a
sign of how much sex you have had.
Maybe he's just not big enough for you : )
I was just kidding about that. But saying
that you aren't tight enough is the same
thing as saying he's not big enough.
People are just different.
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oxfragilerosexo
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2006
Posts: 210
Location: Jacksonville florida
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Posted: 04-22-07 15:33pm
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i was raped at 7 lost my virginity
willingly when i was 15 or 16 and did not
bbreak my hymen (i think that is the word
haha) until i was 18
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005
Posts: 12984
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
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Posted: 04-22-07 15:46pm
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| oxfragilerosexo
wrote: | | i was raped at 7 lost my
virginity willingly when i was 15 or 16
and did not bbreak my hymen (i think that
is the word haha) until i was
18 |
I'm sorry to hear you were raped.
I too didn't break my hymen the first (or
second... or dozen) time I had sex. It
happened almost a year later.
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NWKC
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Apr 2007
Posts: 134
Location: The States
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Not Intended to Sound Cocky.
Posted: 04-22-07 16:07pm
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| marissacooper
wrote: | hey
i din't bleed when i lost my virginity, is
this possible? my boyfriend doesn't
believe i was a virgin before, and also
says that i am not as "tight" as i should
be, which he says is the way to tell if i
am faithful ( which i am) he thinks that
if a girl doesn't have sex for a while the
muscles in your vagina tighten up or
something. i also wondered because he's
circumsised is it harder for him to feel
anything? thanks for any help anyone can
provide
|
I'm quite curious to know if your
boyfriend took any sex ed classes.
Although I'm a male, I know for a fact
that someone, especially your boyfriend
should not make such accusations on false
knowledge; I learned that from my first
and suffered.
One thing I dispise, by your question it
seems is if you act as if just because a
male is cirmcumcised he loses all or most
sensitivity in the penis. I'm
circumcised... and I can well damn feel
just about everything, plus more
...compared to the nerves in my index
finger. When circumcised, the nerves
aren't butchered with a cleaver. 
| Llewellyn
wrote: | | Usually, men who are
circumcised do lose a bit of the
sensitivity that uncircumcised men
have. |
I actually believe that is true, so I've
heard around from research. By the way,
nice job on the search and information.
I've actually learned something new today.
| oxfragilerosexo
wrote: | | i was raped at 7 lost my
virginity willingly when i was 15 or 16
and did not bbreak my hymen (i think that
is the word haha) until i was
18 |
Sorry to hear that. Some men should be
brought out back and shot; the people who
molest and rape, severely ruin society.
| Georgia59
wrote: | | People are just
different. |
That's damn true. 'different strokes
for different folks'.
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Llewellyn
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2007
Posts: 1743
Location: NY
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Re: Not Intended to Sound Penisy.
Posted: 04-22-07 16:15pm
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| NWKC
wrote: |
| Llewellyn
wrote: | | Usually, men who are
circumcised do lose a bit of the
sensitivity that uncircumcised men
have. |
I actually believe that is true, so I've
heard around from research. By the way,
nice job on the search and information.
I've actually learned something new today.
|
Thanks. It's always good
to learn something new. I post those
coolnurse links all over the place. I
think they are great.
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oxfragilerosexo
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2006
Posts: 210
Location: Jacksonville florida
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Posted: 04-22-07 16:16pm
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Well especially since it was an uncle and
i confronted him about it in front of a
bunch of people.. (i just wanted answers
as to y..it has happened more than twice
so i thought it was something i was
doing.. but at seven who knows....)well he
ended up shoving me and told me that it
never happened.. sometimes i wonder if it
was all a bad dream i was only seven maybe
it was u know? but then again iwas raped
by two of my unclesi was sexually molested
by my aunt she used to make me do things
when i was younger and a guy friend of
mine raped me.. and the some other guy
raped me.. and one hight i actually had a
bad feeling about going off with my aunt
and her two freind well needless to say..
one of the guys got my aunt really messed
up and raped her.. well.. that happened to
be the guy that iwas supposed to be going
off with.. if i had not have gotten that
feeling it would have happened again...
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NWKC
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Apr 2007
Posts: 134
Location: The States
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Posted: 04-22-07 16:34pm
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| oxfragilerosexo
wrote: | | Well especially since it was
an uncle and i confronted him about it in
front of a bunch of people.. (i just
wanted answers as to y..it has happened
more than twice so i thought it was
something i was doing.. but at seven who
knows....)well he ended up shoving me and
told me that it never happened.. sometimes
i wonder if it was all a bad dream i was
only seven maybe it was u know? but then
again iwas raped by two of my unclesi was
sexually molested by my aunt she used to
make me do things when i was younger and a
guy friend of mine raped me.. and the some
other guy raped me.. and one hight i
actually had a bad feeling about going off
with my aunt and her two freind well
needless to say.. one of the guys got my
aunt really !@#^ed up and raped her..
well.. that happened to be the guy that
iwas supposed to be going off with.. if i
had not have gotten that feeling it would
have happened
again... |
 That's completely
horrible. I've very sorry to hear. I mean
my mother was molested when she was
younger. And it's hard to deal with even
knowing that someone you love very much
was abused in such manner.
All I have to say is, please don't
continue the circle of this horrible
mishap. Reason I say this is, so I've
heard, that majority of victims who were
raped or molested are brought up to
continue with this nature and harm other
people. Some people see it as a disease.
Although, you are clearly not a horrible
person. Just be cautious and really
careful. I'm glad you caught that feeling
before it happened again.
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Llewellyn
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2007
Posts: 1743
Location: NY
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Posted: 04-22-07 16:45pm
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| NWKC
wrote: | | Reason I say this is, so
I've heard, that majority of victims who
were raped or molested are brought up to
continue with this nature and harm other
people. |
Actually, most people who abuse were
abused at some point. However, that does
not mean that most people who are abused
will become abusers. Confusing, I know.
It's a very subtle difference.
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NWKC
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Apr 2007
Posts: 134
Location: The States
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Posted: 04-22-07 17:02pm
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| Llewellyn
wrote: | | NWKC
wrote: | | Reason I say this is, so
I've heard, that majority of victims who
were raped or molested are brought up to
continue with this nature and harm other
people. |
Actually, most people who abuse were
abused at some point. However, that does
not mean that most people who are abused
will become abusers. Confusing, I know.
It's a very subtle difference. |
I know... I wasn't intending it to quite
come out so stereotypical. Like I said, my
mother was molested; she never abused me
in such manner. And I was going to ask if
her aunt or uncle had been abused in their
history. But I thought about leaving it
out. There's a certain limit that I
respectively not pry.
...I already said, it's a vicious
circle...and some people that are exposed
to this horrible nature prevoke it and/or
even worse keep having it attack by
selecting more and more victims. I know quite well
about what I speak of.
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oxfragilerosexo
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2006
Posts: 210
Location: Jacksonville florida
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Posted: 04-22-07 17:26pm
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| NWKC
wrote: | | Llewellyn
wrote: | | NWKC
wrote: | | Reason I say this is, so
I've heard, that majority of victims who
were raped or molested are brought up to
continue with this nature and harm other
people. |
Actually, most people who abuse were
abused at some point. However, that does
not mean that most people who are abused
will become abusers. Confusing, I know.
It's a very subtle difference. |
I know... I wasn't intending it to quite
come out so stereotypical. Like I said, my
mother was molested; she never abused me
in such manner. And I was going to ask if
her aunt or uncle had been abused in their
history. But I thought about leaving it
out. There's a certain limit that I
respectively not pry.
...I already said, it's a vicious
circle...and some people that are exposed
to this horrible nature prevoke it and/or
even worse keep having it attack by
selecting more and more victims. I know quite well
about what I speak
of. |
I have no intentions of hurting anyone.. i
am not heartless...although i do have
trust issues.. and it seems that (even in
relationships i push everyone away)
anytime i get really happy. or really
close to someone.. to the point of
marriage i have even pushed them away.. i
do not know why.. i think it is a
psychological thing
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NWKC
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Apr 2007
Posts: 134
Location: The States
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Posted: 04-22-07 17:42pm
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| oxfragilerosexo
wrote: | | NWKC
wrote: | | Llewellyn
wrote: | | NWKC
wrote: | | Reason I say this is, so
I've heard, that majority of victims who
were raped or molested are brought up to
continue with this nature and harm other
people. |
Actually, most people who abuse were
abused at some point. However, that does
not mean that most people who are abused
will become abusers. Confusing, I know.
It's a very subtle difference. |
I know... I wasn't intending it to quite
come out so stereotypical. Like I said, my
mother was molested; she never abused me
in such manner. And I was going to ask if
her aunt or uncle had been abused in their
history. But I thought about leaving it
out. There's a certain limit that I
respectively not pry.
...I already said, it's a vicious
circle...and some people that are exposed
to this horrible nature prevoke it and/or
even worse keep having it attack by
selecting more and more victims. I know quite well
about what I speak
of. |
I have no intentions of hurting anyone.. i
am not heartless...although i do have
trust issues.. and it seems that (even in
relationships i push everyone away)
anytime i get really happy. or really
close to someone.. to the point of
marriage i have even pushed them away.. i
do not know why.. i think it is a
psychological
thing |
I didn't think you were from the way I
read your replies. I generally say that to
anyone who has become a victim; I've
actually met and know people, (whom I
don't talk to anymore for specific
reasons), that had filled up with hate and
abuse younger people. And I'm honestly
glad you aren't one of those people. I
fully understand your reasoning, maybe not
on the same issue, but trust is an easy
thing to lose, as well, abuse. I have
several friends that are victims, I've
even recently spoke to a girl across town,
who was molested by a doctor in her
previous years. you cant really trust
anyone anymore...it's pitiful. I rarely
trust many people in the dating world due
to my ex's actions. Love is also quite
hard to come by. I can well understand why
you push people away...and there is a flip
side to that, in which you're no longer an
easier target to be attacked again, but
also it'll be harder for you to come
across love. It is partly phychological.
this circle affects many, not only the
victims but even the ones who really care
about the people who had been victimized.
I truly hate to hear and see people recked
like this, and in a sense, it's why I'm
trying to help all the people I can; same
reasons as the many other caring people on
here.
I hope things get better in life for ya.
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Georgia59
Supporter
Joined: 11 Apr 2007
Posts: 5557
Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
Thanks: 90
Thanked:32
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Posted: 04-23-07 15:19pm
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Oh honey, have you had therapy??
You sound perfectly healthy, but I know
these things are hard to ever heal from on
your own. Just a suggestion.
You must be one tough cookie.
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*Vanessa*
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Apr 2007
Posts: 111
Location: Australia
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Posted: 04-23-07 21:26pm
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I think just about everyone of these chiks
r right, i was a virgin when met my bf,
but he didnt believe me either, said i
wasnt, but we grew close, its been 2 yrs
now and we r closer than ever, he never
once doubted me that i wasnt a virgin
before him, i simply explained that if i
wasnt a virgin before i met him, then i
prolly would have told him caz its not
that big of a deal, this guy sounds like a
paranoide tool, and u no what they say,
which ever significant other in the
relationship are more paranoide and
jelouse about other people are more likely
the ones going to cheat, so just remember
that next time he thinks otherwise, sorry
im just rambling, good luck hun xox
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makai_oni
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Apr 2007
Posts: 5
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Help!
Posted: 04-23-07 21:58pm
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Okay im a bit scared, I too have just lost
my virginity however it was unprotected.
I'm 100% positive I did not cum, however
im fearful of Precum... can anyone put my
mind at ease? What is the likelyness I got
my partner Pregnant? I'm terrified, please
help!
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*Vanessa*
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Apr 2007
Posts: 111
Location: Australia
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Posted: 04-23-07 22:02pm
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ok, some likely percent chance, talk to ur
partner bout it, to ease ur mind, get
test, blood test, talk to her bout any
symptoms like mised period
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makai_oni
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Apr 2007
Posts: 5
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Posted: 04-23-07 22:07pm
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can you give me any type of chances most
information site ive visited say anwhere
from .1-4% chance is this true?
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