Joined: 19 Aug 2006 Posts: 3688 Location: Merrie Englande, UK
Thanks: 52
Thanked:57
Funny Joke Posted: 04-25-07 05:54am
NB/ Tesco is a British Supermarket
One day, leaning on the bar in the pub,
Jack says to Mike
"My elbow hurts like hell. I suppose I'd
better see a Doctor!"
“Listen, don't waste your time down at
the surgery," Mike replies.
"There's a new diagnostic computer at
Tesco Pharmacy.”
“Just give it a urine sample and the
computer will tell you what's wrong,
and what to do about it. It takes ten
seconds and only costs five
quid.....a lot quicker and better than a
doctor and you get Club card
points."
So Jack collects a urine sample in a small
jar and takes it to Tesco.
He deposits five pounds and the computer
lights up and asks for the urine
sample.
He pours the sample into the slot and
waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a
printout: "You have tennis elbow.
Soak your arm in warm water and avoid
heavy activity. It will improve in
two weeks."
That evening while thinking how amazing
this new technology was, Jack
began wondering if the computer could be
fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample
from his dog, urine samples from
his wife and daughter and the cat, and
masturbated into the mixture for
good measure.
Jack hurried back to Tesco, eager to check
what would happen.
He deposits five pounds, pours in his
concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer printed the following:
1) Your tap water is too hard. Get a water
softener.
2) Your cat's having kittens. Get a vet
3) Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with
anti-fungal shampoo.
4) Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get
her into rehab.
5) Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They
aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
6) And if you don't stop playing with
yourself, your elbow will never get
better
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Becky
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jan 2006 Posts: 6220 Location: London, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:7
Posted: 04-25-07 06:00am
hahahaha! hilarious!
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oh_mommy
Supporter
Joined: 04 Sep 2005 Posts: 3689 Location: vancouver island, bc canada
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Schizophreniahealth
This page was last updated on June 11, 2008
BWahahahaaha!! That's hilarious!!!!!!!
