pixma
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Aug 2005
Posts: 1015
Location: NSW Australia
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Fiance Doesnt Want Baby!!
Posted: 05-03-07 07:52am
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well i think i am about 6 weeks pregnant
and my fiance came out and told me that if
we have this baby he will rezent it!! 
I realise that we are not really ready to
start a family but i have been diagnosed
with both endo and pcos. This baby is a
miracle!!!
I cant get rid of it!! i am so upset right
now!! i might be losing the love of my
life and become a single mum!!
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Posted: 05-03-07 09:47am
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Hi sorry to hear that, i was with my ex bf
for 4years we broke up last july, I found
out i was pregnant and he said he would
resent it and finsihed with me and said i
had to have an abortion, im not saying ur
fiance would tell you to do that. just i
was so upset but stupid me did what he
wanted, it was the worst decission of my
life, as i was 17wks and had give birth to
it. after i had done that he finished me
anyways so i lost 2 things that i loved.
dont let him force you into anything u
dont wanna do thats all im saying. he
might even get used to the idea  he might just be in
shock.
good luck anyways
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Becky
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jan 2006
Posts: 6224
Location: London, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:7
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Posted: 05-03-07 09:50am
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i am sorry to hear you are going through
this. as a single mum of 2 young babies i
can sympathise. it may just be that your
fiance is in shock and needs some time to
get his head round things.
one thing i can say to you is if you did
'get rid of' your baby for your fiance you
would end up resenting him and would
probably never forgive him as it's not
what you want.
do you live together? i think he needs
some space to think things through and
decide what he wants.
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Willa Weintraub
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Mar 2007
Posts: 3399
Location: The Beach!
Thanks: 30
Thanked:46
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Posted: 05-03-07 10:14am
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I agree with the above posters.if this
child is a miracle,s/he happened for a
good damn reason and don't let anyone take
that from you!good luck!
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kaerbear
Most Diplomatic Poster
Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Posts: 1557
Location: ,
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Posted: 05-03-07 12:40pm
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I know it must be really scary and
upsetting but try not to think of it as a
loss. If he really decided to leave you
and your baby it's not your loss it's his.
You will be gaining a child of your own
to love. Motherhood is a gift and a
blessing even when it is difficult. My
mom raised 5 of us on her own when my dad
decided he couldn't be bothered anymore
and we struggled a lot but my mom was so
strong and I'm so proud of her. I know
other women who have gone through the same
thing, being left alone to raise a baby on
their own and I've been so impressed by
their strength and the love they have for
their children. My cousin had this happen
to her twice and she just embraced her
role as a mother and decided she would be
the best mother she could be.
I do sympathise. My own pregnancy was
unplanned and we went through a tough time
at the beginning trying to come to terms
with being parents when we didn't feel
ready even though we were planning to have
children one day. Maybe he will come
around eventually. It takes time to
adjust to the idea of having this huge
responsibility when you weren't planning
on it. Especially when you can't see the
rewards that come with it yet. Men don't
experience pregnancy the same way we do.
Some of them don't bond with their baby
until they are able to hold them in their
arms while we carry them inside us for all
those months feeling all their little
movements.
If he doesn't come around and decide to
own up to his responsibility as a father,
just remember there are laws and he does
have to help you out financially at
least.
I hope and pray everthing works out for
you. Good luck.
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pixma
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Aug 2005
Posts: 1015
Location: NSW Australia
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Posted: 05-03-07 22:52pm
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Thank you for reading my post. I have
tears in my eyes!!
he does want me to have an abortion and i
know that i will resent him if later on
when "he's" ready i find out that i cant.
We have been together for 5 years and
living together for most of that also got
engaged last month. I would give him time
cause i need it just as much as he does
but i have nowhere to go. 
I have given up so much to be with him but
i cant give up this. He's asking too much
of me this time.
Thanks again for your thoughts.
pixma
p.s i'm due xmas day!!!!!!!!
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Willa Weintraub
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Mar 2007
Posts: 3399
Location: The Beach!
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Posted: 05-04-07 06:25am
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oh yay! well good luck hunni and I hope
things start getting a little better for
you! please keep us updated! 
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Posted: 05-04-07 09:04am
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you do whats best for you, at the end of
the day its your body, If you want this
baby and do it alone, once you have had
the baby, i bet he will want to be part of
its life, my ex bf made me have an
abortion the relationship was never the
same again. i blamed him all the time, i
had to have councelling and everthing was
worst time of my life.
Good luck anyways !!! and congrats on the
xmas day birth mines due on my
21st birthday
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Willa Weintraub
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Mar 2007
Posts: 3399
Location: The Beach!
Thanks: 30
Thanked:46
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Posted: 05-04-07 10:01am
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| jaime_elms
wrote: |
Good luck anyways !!! and congrats on the
xmas day birth mines due on my
21st birthday |
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Willa Weintraub
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Mar 2007
Posts: 3399
Location: The Beach!
Thanks: 30
Thanked:46
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pixma
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Aug 2005
Posts: 1015
Location: NSW Australia
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Posted: 05-04-07 21:39pm
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he's changed his mind!!!!!
I think seeing his parents reaction may
have had something to do with it!!
Apparently his mum squealed and neally wet
herself!!! 
He says he is really freaking out about
the whole situation but he has had one on
one conversations with a few mates that
have been in the same situation.
What a turnaround from the other day
hey!!!
Thanks 
P.s I was born xmas eve!! but i was meant
to be born xmas day!!
Doc induced my mum
cause he didnt want to be there xmas
day!!No word of a lie!
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HcoBrunette06
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Dec 2005
Posts: 8005
Location: Missouri, United States
Thanks: 2
Thanked:1
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Posted: 05-04-07 22:51pm
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i am so happy to hear that!!!
guys tend to freak out about these kind of
things, its understandable, and he was
obviously just having poor judgement at
the time. im so happy things have turned
around!
good luck and please keep us updated!
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