I'm Just Talking, I Guess Posted: 05-03-07 13:54pm
So, my last year and a half have been
interesting enough. I came out to my
girlfriend last summer and told her I'd
been having issues with myself, and
finally declared myself bi. She was
worried for a while that she'd lose my for
a guy (and she almost did, I'll admit. Not
to a specific guy, but b/c I was
curious).
I almost lost her twice b/c I thought I
wanted to be with a guy, and I came out to
my parents, telling them I was bi (I don't
think they believe me still. But if they
knew what me and my gf do in bed, they
probably would).
My gf has been supportive of me being bi
(we use a more comfortable term for her
sake- straight with bisexual tendencies,
since I've never had sex with a guy).
I guess the thing that bothers me though
is myself. See, as much as I enjoy the
"normal" guy and girl sex, I still would
like to have some more options that I
enjoy. I guess what I'm saying is that
sometimes, I do stuff by myself that suits
my bisexual tendencies, and I feel bad for
not telling my gf.
It also bothers me that sometimes, I like
to wear women's clothing, and I don't tell
my gf about that either. I told her about
that, and she was comfortable with it, as
long as it was only once in a while. I
haven't done it for nearly five months
now, but I'd like to do it a little more
often. Like I said, I do it secretly when
I'm at my house, but I guess I feel bad
not telling her, because she'll start
wondering I guess.
I really do love her, and want to spend
the rest of my life with her. I know it
makes her a little uncomfortable with the
women's clothing thing, but she's fine
with my sexuality. So, how do I tell her
that I do things in private without making
her upset or worried?
Anyone that can help, or has gone through
a similar situation from either side,
please help me if you can.
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
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Posted: 05-03-07 14:48pm
I am a straight. I am engaged to a
bisexual man. He was out before I began
dating him and it never bothered me. He'd
kissed men before but that was it. He also
does things to himself in private. I'd
love to do thing to him actually! Like a
strap on, or whatever.
I was never worried of losing him before
we were engaged. He cross-dresses too, but
not often. I'm fine with that; I like to
cross-dress too! I actually decided he was
really hot looking while he was cross
dressing in a miniskirt and tank top,
singing karaoke. We are basically
opposite-gendered versions of ourselves in
many aspects. We even look similar lol.
If you want to spend your life with her,
you shouldn't have to hide yourself from
her. You should be able to freely engage
in the activities you like such as
cross-dressing and alternative sex
practices (monogamously of course).
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weapons_and_magic
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jan 2007 Posts: 5
Posted: 05-04-07 14:19pm
Okay, by monogamously, you mean in
private, by myself I guess.
Well, let me just summarize some more.
This is how I feel about wearing women's
clothing. I'm not into the whole putting
makeup on, shaving my legs, taking time to
look like a girl. I just want to wear what
I want, when I want.
I think the whole reason behind the is
(don't take this the wrong way), I envy
girls and their clothing choice. I mean,
you get skirts and low cut shirts to show
off everything. Not that all girls do, but
it's an option. All guys can get are
tight, stretchy shorts or pants that show
off what an erection they can get, and
they're looked down on for that. Some
girls are too for wearing short skirts,
but it just seems so unfair that girls
have an oppurtunity to show off what
they've got, when guys are stuck with
nothing.
I'm glad I got in contact with an Ally
like you (I just looked up what it was
today. lol). There are Allies on campus
here where I am, but only teachers and
staff are listed. I want someone my own
age I can talk to, preferably (if I can
find someone), someone who is going
through the same thing or already has.
If you can help me some more, it'd be
appreciated.
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 05-07-07 12:32pm
weapons_and_magic
wrote:
Okay, by monogamously, you
mean in private, by myself I
guess.
Monagamously actually means you are
dating/having sex with only one person.
It's got nothing to do with how you behave
when you're alone. Monagamously actually
means that there is one other person in
your life.
Quote:
Well, let me just
summarize some more. This is how I feel
about wearing women's clothing. I'm not
into the whole putting makeup on, shaving
my legs, taking time to look like a girl.
I just want to wear what I want, when I
want.
That's cool. Women have been doing it for
a century now, wearing pants and t-shirts
and other masculine clothing. So why can't
a guy wear a skirt? I see no problem with
it ^^
Quote:
I think the whole
reason behind the is (don't take this the
wrong way), I envy girls and their
clothing choice. I mean, you get skirts
and low cut shirts to show off everything.
Not that all girls do, but it's an option.
All guys can get are tight, stretchy
shorts or pants that show off what an
erection they can get, and they're looked
down on for that. Some girls are too for
wearing short skirts, but it just seems so
unfair that girls have an oppurtunity to
show off what they've got, when guys are
stuck with
nothing.
I absolutely agree. Guys should have the
choice to wear whatever the hell thy want
to wear! I know a guy who wears low cut
flare jeans and women's tight shorts,
showing off his midrift. He looks hot in
them you know?
Quote:
I'm glad I got in
contact with an Ally like you (I just
looked up what it was today. lol). There
are Allies on campus here where I am, but
only teachers and staff are listed. I want
someone my own age I can talk to,
preferably (if I can find someone),
someone who is going through the same
thing or already has.
If you can help me some more, it'd be
appreciated.
I'm not sure exactly what to do; it all
depends on how active your college's
.g.l.b.t.a communitty is... On my campus
we have the rainbow alliance.
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weapons_and_magic
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Jan 2007 Posts: 5
Posted: 05-07-07 14:44pm
basically, what I'm saying here. I love
this girl to death. We have our problems,
but I know I want to spend the rest of my
life with her. I also want to be who I am.
I don't want to lose her either. I'm not
sure what to do.
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 05-07-07 20:39pm
weapons_and_magic
wrote:
basically, what I'm saying
here. I love this girl to death. We have
our problems, but I know I want to spend
the rest of my life with her. I also want
to be who I am. I don't want to lose her
either. I'm not sure what to
do.
All you can do is be yourself. You are a
great person. You have many habits my
fiancee has, and I've got no problem with
him at all.
