Funny Had to Laugh : How Seven Year Old Explains Sex Posted: 05-27-07 16:15pm
Little Johnny was 7 years old, and like
other boys his age, rather curious. He had
been hearing quite a bit about 'making
out' from the older boys, and he wondered
what it was and how it was done. One day
he took his question to his mother, who
became rather flustered. Instead of
explaining things to little Johnny, she
told him to hide behind the curtains one
night and watch his older sister and her
boyfriend.This he did. The following
morning, Johnny described everything to
his mother. "Sis and her boyfriend sat and
talked for a while, then he turned off
most of the lights. Then he started
kissing and hugging her. I figured 'Sis
must be getting sick, because her face
started looking funny. He must have
thought so too, because he put his hand
inside her blouse to feel her heart, just
the way the doctor would. Except he's not
as smart as the doctor because he seemed
to have trouble finding her heart. I guess
he was getting sick too, because pretty
soon both of them started panting and
getting all out of breath. His other hand
must have been cold because he put it
under her skirt. About this time 'Sis got
worse and began to moan and sigh and
squirm around and slide down toward the
end of the couch. This was when her fever
started. I knew it was a fever, because
Sis told him she felt really hot. Finally,
I found out what was making them so sick -
a big eel had gotten inside his pants
somehow. It just jumped out of his pants
and stood there, about 10 inches long,
honest. Anyway, he grabbed it in one hand
to keep it from getting away. When Sis saw
it, she got really scared-her eyes got
big, and her mouth fell open, and she
started calling out to God and stuff like
that. She said it was the biggest one
she's ever seen. I should tell her about
the ones down at the lake by our house!
Anyway, Sis got brave and tried to kill
the eel by biting its head off. All of a
sudden she grabbed it with both hands and
held it tight while he took a muzzle out
of his pocket and slipped it over the
eel's head to keep it from biting again.
Sis lay back and spread her legs so she
could get a scissor-lock on it and he
helped by lying on top of the eel. The eel
put up a hell of a fight. Sis started
groaning and squealing and her boyfriend
almost upset the couch. I guess they
wanted to kill the eel by squashing it
between them. After a while they both quit
moving and gave a great sigh. Her
boyfriend got up, and sure enough, they
killed the eel. I knew because it just
hung there, limp, and some of its insides
were hanging out. Sis and her boyfriend
were a little tired from the battle, but
they went back to courting anyway. He
started hugging and kissing her again. By
golly, the eel wasn't dead! It jumped
straight up and started to fight again. I
guess eels are like cats - they have nine
lives or something. This time, Sis jumped
up and tried to kill it by sitting on it.
After about a 35 minute struggle, they
finally killed the eel. I knew it was
dead, because I saw Sis's boyfriend peel
its skin off and flush it down the toilet
sorry its so long but it is too cute
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oh_mommy
Supporter
Joined: 04 Sep 2005 Posts: 3742 Location: vancouver island, bc canada
Thanks: 6
Thanked:0
Posted: 05-28-07 13:53pm
lol that gave me a laugh... can you
immagion if ur kid told you that about
your daughter i'd be sitting there like
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oxfragilerosexo
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2006 Posts: 210 Location: Jacksonville florida
Posted: 05-28-07 16:13pm
oh_mommy
wrote:
lol that gave me a laugh...
can you immagion if ur kid told you that
about your daughter i'd be sitting there
like
Oh wow.. all I can do is think If i had kids and
that was going on I dunno if i would freak
or just be like OMG lol
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confused_girl
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Mar 2005 Posts: 102 Location: vermont
Posted: 05-28-07 20:31pm
I thought it was just to cute to pass up
posting to give a few people a laugh
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HcoBrunette06
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Posts: 8016 Location: Florida, United States
Thanks: 3
Thanked:1
Posted: 05-28-07 20:34pm
lol jesus. im glad i don't have a little
brother who lives with me.
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Bridget
Moderator
Joined: 27 Jan 2006 Posts: 10834 Location: ,
Thanks: 63
Thanked:42
Posted: 05-28-07 20:43pm
maybe i'm getting old, but i didn't think
it was cute. i thought it was kind of
dirty and inappropriate. i felt like some
dirty old man wrote it.
(don't worry, i wasn't offended or
anything.)
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confused_girl
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Mar 2005 Posts: 102 Location: vermont
Posted: 05-28-07 20:45pm
sorry I didnt mean to offend but like you
said you werent offeneded but i just
wanted to tell everyone i am sorry I
shouldnt post stuff like this
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oxfragilerosexo
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jan 2006 Posts: 210 Location: Jacksonville florida
Posted: 05-29-07 10:30am
confused_girl
wrote:
sorry I didnt mean to offend
but like you said you werent offeneded but
i just wanted to tell everyone i am sorry
I shouldnt post stuff like
this
I don't see where there was anything
wrong with it. I sent it to half my
family. So...