I'm a 16 year old male that has left
school for a coures in July and has ADHD.
I've been feelign depressed for over 4
years now, when i was 12 - 13 i used to
cut my self to punish myself for thinking
i was a loser. I stopped that when my mum
walked into my room and caught me. After
that i was put on a anti depressent called
fluoxide as i recall. I felt fine when i
was on that during the day but not in the
evening when it seemed to wear off. After
6 months my parents took me off it
thinking i wasnt depressed. After all that
time i still am. The reasons i think im
depressed is because im so alone.. my
friends never talk to me anymore where as
they used to call me each day now if im
lucky i will get a single text each year
if i want to come over for fireworks (last
year i stuffed it up and got sent home
because i accidently set fire to a hill
:'() i havent had a girl friend in over a
year and even if i did get one i would not
have the self esteem or confidence to tell
her how i feel, even now i feel scared to
write this incase i get put down, my
parents say maybe 2 words to me a day
"good morning" "good night" and I spend
almost 24/7 on the computer trying not to
think of who i am and why im so alone.
The only thing that keeps me going is that
on my course i will make a friend or when
im older i will be able to go to a bar and
socialise.
I have thought of suicide many times but
the closest i came to it is when i drank a
full bottle of rum and 8 bottles of 5%
beer and vommited several times in my
sleep. The rest of the times i contemplate
suicide i think im trying to get attention
from my self by thinking it and it makes
me feel even worse.
I dont want to tell my parents how i feel
because it isnt how our family works my
dad suffered from depression and it
crushed my mum i dont want to put her
through that again. I wish i had a friend
that could support me though i dont. My
only friend is 14 years old and still goes
to my old school i think our friend ship
will eventually fail.
I would like to go to a doctor and tell
him how i feel so i can be subscribed to a
medication but i dont have the confidence
to do so in case my parents find out. If
any body could please give me some advice
on what to do i would appreciate it so
much :'(
I think no matter how much you would hate
it getting professional help and getting
put back on medication is your best bet.
Yeah your mom dealt with it through your
dad but it will be worse for her if you
dont get help. The sooner you get help the
better it will be, Also you can talk to
your dr about trying diff meds to find one
that works for you it might take a while
tofind the right one and right dosage but
dont give up.
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Anonym0us
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 May 2007 Posts: 2
Posted: 05-31-07 19:58pm
Only way i can get help is if i tell my
parents and i REALLY dont want to do
that... and i dont trust counsellers
because my school one when i was at school
told my parents everything i said to her
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catswold
Supporter
Joined: 10 Oct 2005 Posts: 404 Location: Flint, Michigan
Posted: 06-01-07 12:17pm
Can you tell your parents that you need to
see your doctor? Don't tell them why
unless they really get on you. Just
stress that you aren't feeling well and
really want to talk to your doctor.
Alone. I do think you should sit down and
talk with your parents and tell them that
you want to go back on the medication that
you were on; that you felt much better
then. Parents really do want what's best
for their kids. Sometimes they just don't
know how to show it.
