I know exactly how you feel...
My ex broke up with me after 3 1/2 years
and kicked me out of our apartment right
after I quit my job.. I ended up living
in a hotel for a while and thought about
killing myself everyday. I was diagnosed
with depression shortly before our break
up, and the anti depressants helped a lot.
I went through a lot of counsiling before
and after I started taking the ADs. It
definately is normal to feel that way
after such a messy break up, coming from
someone who has been through it as well.
When he first broke up with me, I thought
I was trash. He was my first love and I
had thought we were going to get married
one day. Shortly after the break up, when
I was living in the hotel, I made awful
choices. I didn't sleep, I didn't eat
more than 1 meal a day, and I felt so bad
I wouldn't even call my friends. Then one
day I woke up and realized that wasn't
where I wanted to be in life, and that I
needed to move on.
Moving on is very important. If you can
sit down and think about where you want to
be tomorrow, next week, and 6 months from
now, it will help a lot. Think about
yourself, and how strong of a person you
can be. If you don't want to let your
family down, prove to them how strong you
are by continuing your life, just without
your ex. I recommend surronding yourself
with your own group of friends, and try to
limit time with mutual friends. Whenever
you get a chance, go out and do fun
things, don't just let yourself sit idle
and think about the break up. I ended up
getting into paintball because it was a
fun, exciting, outdoor activity that I
could get absorbed into and not always
have my ex in the back of my mind. At
first, all these things might just seem
like distractions, but you'll realize that
life really can be fun without a spouse,
and that's when you can move on.
I'm sure that once you start surrounding
yourself with fun things, you'll start
feeling better about life. I still
recommend seeing a counsilor, as they can
help far more than many people think. ((I
was amazed at how my counsilor got me
talking, and pinpointed the source of my
troubles even before i did!))
Anyways, hope I helped some, and don't get
feeling too bad
Everyone
goes through this at some point or
another, and I'm here for ya.
~~Jessica
PS - PM me if you feel that things are
getting too hard, I'll always listen and
give the best advice I can
