Am I Really As Bad of a Person As I Feel?? Posted: 02-27-04 16:58pm
I no everyone has there different views on
things but I am really doubting whether I
should have my baby. I have only just
come out of hospital as my babies dad beat
me yesterday really bad n there is now n
high risk my baby is goin to have brain
damage or b deformed in some way.
But to add to it I have also found out
there is a high chance my baby will be
still born now do I go through all this
and still either end up wit a child I wont
be able to cope with or having to carry my
child for 9 months only o find out it has
died during labour? I no u ladies cant
tell me what to do but does it make me a
bad person just wonderin how easy it would
be not to have this baby and go through
all this?
Rachel xx
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2ferano
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Dec 2003 Posts: 3717
Posted: 02-27-04 18:03pm
No one can judge you except the almighty.
It would be really hard to have a
mentally challenged child and it would
also be terrible to give birth to a
stillborn child. (a friend of mine just
did at eight months). Given your
situation there must be a lot of different
things running through your mind and all
kinds of emotions through your veins.
Just do not do anything drastic. But I
am hoping you are not with the father
anymore? You better not be. You deserve
better than that. Any man who would put
his hands on a woman, especially pregnant,
is a piece of caca. He needs to be taken
outside and beaten till near death.
Isn't there anyway the doctors can tell if
your baby is damaged(for lack of a better
word)? Just do not make any drastic
decisions until you know. And get as far
away from the "sperm donor" as possible.
Make your decision for you and not for
anyone else. God bless.
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KissyBai912
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Aug 2003 Posts: 1762 Location: Venice, Florida
Posted: 03-01-04 18:20pm
No sweetie you r definitely not terrible
for feeling the way u do! I dunno what I
would do in ur situation. But we are here
for you in whatever decision you
make....It must be so hard for you and I
am terribly sorry. But just know, I dont
think there is any wrong or right decision
in this case. The best of luck to you!
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niceguy
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Aug 2003 Posts: 150 Location: New York
Posted: 03-01-04 19:08pm
I just can't stand guys who beat up their
wives.
I definitely think they are retarded or
they wouldn't obviously lay a hand on
someone who is weaker and needs our love.
But anyway, I think you should do the
following:
1) first leave the creep once and for all
and go somewhere that he can't find you.
2) have the baby checked out with
ultrasound. And get an expert opinion as
to the prospects of having the baby.
3) if there is the slightest chance the
baby will be deformed, get an abortion.
Find someone who loves you and have a baby
with him that you can both love and
cherish.
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Amymc
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Dec 2003 Posts: 13 Location: canada
Posted: 03-01-04 19:32pm
You are under no circumstances a bad
person for what's happened to you, I truly
hope that you can end the relationship you
are in with this man, and find a way to
move on no one deserves this kind of
treatment, ever! I hope your unborn child
is going to be mentally and physically
okay, I can completley understand your
concerns, and you reasoning for doubting
this pregnancy now, however there must be
tests that can be done to determine the
wellbeing of your child. I work with
developmentally disabled adults and it is
very challenging work, and in no way,
shape or form would I ever wish that upon
my worst enemy, although many things
happen that are out of our control and not
able to be detected, it is no one's fault
when children are born that way. You have
a choice and I hope that you make the
one's that are right for you, no one can
tell you what to do or not to do, we can
support you in whatever decision you make.
I wish you the best of luck and hope you
have someone you really can trust and
depend on to help you through this
difficult time.
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ciao77
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Feb 2004 Posts: 77
Posted: 03-01-04 21:08pm
Never doubt your benevolence as a human
being. You are in no way a bad person. I
know how hard this situation is for you
but believe me, you will come out of it a
stronger person. First off, you shouldn't
have to deal with an abusive partner. It
is not a healthy relationship. What's
more, he is putting your baby's life in
danger. Talk to someone you trust about
this. About the abortion, how far along
are you in your pregnancy? In my opinion,
it is not fair for the baby to be brought
into such a relationship. If you're
having doubts, you should talk to your
doctor about your options. I hope
everything works out for the best.
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where_is_the_line
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Jul 2004 Posts: 173 Location: USA: NY & DC
No You Are Not Posted: 07-22-04 01:29am
I hope you haven't aborted yet.
Even though abortion seems to be an easy
way out, which is why too many women
choose it, you still have to be able to
accept it psychologically. If there is
still a chance for your baby to come out
relatively alright, than do you feel you
owe it to your own child the chance to
carry out their life?
