Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 186 Location: Pennsylvania
My Thoughts On Abortion Posted: 06-19-07 17:43pm
In the beginning of my first pregnancy
I'll admit that I wanted an abortion b/c I
was having extremely bad pains in the
uterus that would not go away. My b/f did
not want me to have an abortion b/c he's
against but I was goin thru so much pain
in the beginning. I chose not to have an
abortion b/c I really wanted this baby. So
I finally tried to toughen up on this pain
I was having and tried to make it through
the pregnancy. And now that I have a
beautiful 3 month old daughter...I'm glad
that I didnt have an abortion. when I
look into her face...I just want to cry
cuz just thinking that I almost killed
her. It hurts to just think that I almost
did that. My b/f doesnt help at all...he
seems to like to make me feel bad about
it.
My thoughts on abortion is that I feel
that women should have a choice but they
should think their decision over before
moving ahead to perform this choice. Also
think about how the decision will affect
the ppl around them.
|
Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 4044 Location: Bliss,
Thanks: 142
Thanked:13
Re: Thought of Abortion Posted: 06-19-07 19:30pm
bernibaby86
wrote:
...
My thoughts on abortion is that I feel
that women should have a choice but they
should think their decision over before
moving ahead to perform this choice. Also
think about how the decision will affect
the ppl around
them.
Hello. Congrats on breeding.
It's obvious that women think about their
decision ahead of time, why would you say
that? Reading in between your lines here,
and I do so humbly apologize if I'm
offbase, but one would think that you
might be implying that if women thought
"before performing this choice" ahead of
time, they might choose otherwise?
Maybe?
Eh?
And why should they think about how the
decision (to have an abortion) will affect
the pple around them? Are "the people
around them" going to take care of said
baby and/or said pregnant woman?
I always advocate making the decision
based on exactly what you want, not any
other person. It goes both ways, too;
boyfriend wants abortion, girlfriend
doesn't, do what she wants. If she took
into consideration what he wants, she
might end up doing something she regrets.
|
Jude-Love
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Jun 2007 Posts: 727 Location: Williamstown, Kentucky USA
Posted: 06-19-07 19:54pm
I'm sorry that your boyfriend makes you
feel guilty about your thoughts in the
beginning of your pregnancy. He has no
idea what you were feeling.
|
meblonde01
Supporter
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 2131 Location: ,
Thanks: 6
Thanked:2
Re: Thought of Abortion Posted: 06-19-07 20:23pm
bernibaby86
wrote:
In the beginning of my first
pregnancy I'll admit that I wanted an
abortion b/c I was having extremely bad
pains in the uterus that would not go
away. My b/f did not want me to have an
abortion b/c he's against but I was goin
thru so much pain in the beginning. I
chose not to have an abortion b/c I really
wanted this baby. So I finally tried to
toughen up on this pain I was having and
tried to make it through the pregnancy.
And now that I have a beautiful 3 month
old daughter...I'm glad that I didnt have
an abortion. when I look into her
face...I just want to cry cuz just
thinking that I almost killed her. It
hurts to just think that I almost did
that. My b/f doesnt help at all...he seems
to like to make me feel bad about it.
My thoughts on abortion is that I feel
that women should have a choice but they
should think their decision over before
moving ahead to perform this choice. Also
think about how the decision will affect
the ppl around
them.
she is a doll.. Thank you for not killing
her!! some women NEVER get over the fact
that they took a life of a child. Do not
think bad of yourself for thinking about
aborting her. You did not do it and that
is all that counts.. Thanks for toughen
up!
|
Cambion
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 747
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 06-19-07 21:17pm
I agree with your statements about choice,
but this kind of made me raise an
eyebrow:
Quote:
Also think about
how the decision will affect the ppl
around them.
Why should a woman think about how her
decision will affect others around her if
she gets an abortion? If she's a teen
knocked up from prom night and still
living with Mommy and Daddy (and will most
likely be mooching off their wallets to
care for Junior because Mickey D's doesn't
pay a six-figure salary), then I could
understand why she would need to think
about 'people around her' if she planned
on keeping it. But why should other people
be taken into consideration in terms of
abortion? It's the woman's choice alone,
and if someone doesn't like her choice,
why should that make a difference?
I'm sorry your boyfriend was such a jerk
to you - sorry, but men have no business
telling women what to do with their
bodies. They never have and never will
know how burdensome pregnancy is, even if
the child is wanted. It's really easy for
them to say they're against abortion
because they'll never find themselves in a
situation where they might need one.
Regardless of your choice, your boyfriend
deserves a smack across the head for
guilt-tripping you.
|
bernibaby86
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 186 Location: Pennsylvania
Re: Thought of Abortion Posted: 06-19-07 21:21pm
Birch
wrote:
bernibaby86
wrote:
...
My thoughts on abortion is that I feel
that women should have a choice but they
should think their decision over before
moving ahead to perform this choice. Also
think about how the decision will affect
the ppl around
them.
Hello. Congrats on breeding.
It's obvious that women think about their
decision ahead of time, why would you say
that? Reading in between your lines here,
and I do so humbly apologize if I'm
offbase, but one would think that you
might be implying that if women thought
"before performing this choice" ahead of
time, they might choose otherwise?
Maybe?
Eh?
And why should they think about how the
decision (to have an abortion) will affect
the pple around them? Are "the people
around them" going to take care of said
baby and/or said pregnant woman?
I always advocate making the decision
based on exactly what you want, not any
other person. It goes both ways, too;
boyfriend wants abortion, girlfriend
doesn't, do what she wants. If she took
into consideration what he wants, she
might end up doing something she
regrets.
Well what I was tryin to say is
that...when I was pregnant and wanted the
abortion, I knew that it would affect the
ppl around me like my family and friends.
I know that these ppl would want to take
care of my baby if I didnt want it. Also I
know it would've affected my b/f even more
b/c he wanted the baby. I've thought about
what it would've done. My friends who are
against abortion would've hated me...my
b/f would've prolly fell into a deep
depression...my family would've been upset
but not disappointed if I made that
decision. I did what I wanted. I wanted to
have the baby and i did. She turned out
wonderful. But still women have the right
to make their own decisions. If they
decide right in the beginning of the
pregnancy that they want an abortion, I'd
think it over for a few weeks. I wouldn't
just go out and get it over with just a
day after the decision was made. Women
should feel comfortable with whatever
decision they make and not feel regret for
whatever the decision is.
|
bernibaby86
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 186 Location: Pennsylvania
Posted: 06-19-07 21:25pm
Cambion
wrote:
I agree with your statements
about choice, but this kind of made me
raise an eyebrow:
Quote:
Also think about
how the decision will affect the ppl
around them.
Why should a woman think about how her
decision will affect others around her if
she gets an abortion? If she's a teen
knocked up from prom night and still
living with Mommy and Daddy (and will most
likely be mooching off their wallets to
care for Junior because Mickey D's doesn't
pay a six-figure salary), then I could
understand why she would need to think
about 'people around her' if she planned
on keeping it. But why should other people
be taken into consideration in terms of
abortion? It's the woman's choice alone,
and if someone doesn't like her choice,
why should that make a difference?
I'm sorry your boyfriend was such a jerk
to you - sorry, but men have no business
telling women what to do with their
bodies. They never have and never will
know how burdensome pregnancy is, even if
the child is wanted. It's really easy for
them to say they're against abortion
because they'll never find themselves in a
situation where they might need one.
Regardless of your choice, your boyfriend
deserves a smack across the head for
guilt-tripping
you.
I just tried to explain this more to
another person.
|
Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 06-19-07 21:41pm
You are lucky that there were people
around you who would have been willing to
care for the baby if you didn't want it.
Most women don't have that, so "thinking
about the people around them" involves
not wanting to place the
burden of a baby on them, because the
people don't want the baby.
|
nightangel73
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Nov 2005 Posts: 2603 Location: ,
Thanks: 17
Thanked:13
Posted: 06-19-07 21:59pm
Cambion
wrote:
sorry, but men have no
business telling women what to do with
their bodies.
if what grows inside the woman is half the
flesh of the man he should definetly have
a say.
|
Jaggirl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Jun 2006 Posts: 4 Location: USA
Re: Thought of Abortion Posted: 06-19-07 22:52pm
My thoughts on abortion is that I feel
that women should have a choice but they
should think their decision over before
moving ahead to perform this choice. Also
think about how the decision will affect
the ppl around them.[/quote]
You are so right in what you said '...they
should think their decision over before
moving ahead to perform this choice.'
I know of many women who are having all
kinds of problems because they DID abort
their babies. Many abortion clinics
misinform these girls/women, by such
statements such as, 'the abortion doesn't
hurt'; 'it's not a baby yet...just a blob
of tissue'; etc. The clinics tell them
that if they have the abortion, no one
will ever have to know. But what they
don't tell them is of the post-abortion
syndrome that many women suffer for years.
Many begin a cycle of self-abuse,
mood-swings, anger, low self-esteem, etc.
If a person does the medical research,
they will discover that these tiny babies
ARE babies at just a few weeks old. Some
of these women who have had abortions have
seen their baby as it was being sucked
from it's safety of the mother's uterus.
All I'm saying is...think it over very
long and hard and make sure you've been
given ALL the facts...pro and con.
Personally, I believe you will be blessed
because you chose life for your little
girl.
|
bernibaby86
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 186 Location: Pennsylvania
Re: Thought of Abortion Posted: 06-20-07 09:59am
Jaggirl
wrote:
You are so right in what you
said '...they should think their decision
over before moving ahead to perform this
choice.'
I know of many women who are having all
kinds of problems because they DID abort
their babies. Many abortion clinics
misinform these girls/women, by such
statements such as, 'the abortion doesn't
hurt'; 'it's not a baby yet...just a blob
of tissue'; etc. The clinics tell them
that if they have the abortion, no one
will ever have to know. But what they
don't tell them is of the post-abortion
syndrome that many women suffer for years.
Many begin a cycle of self-abuse,
mood-swings, anger, low self-esteem, etc.
If a person does the medical research,
they will discover that these tiny babies
ARE babies at just a few weeks old. Some
of these women who have had abortions have
seen their baby as it was being sucked
from it's safety of the mother's uterus.
All I'm saying is...think it over very
long and hard and make sure you've been
given ALL the facts...pro and con.
Personally, I believe you will be blessed
because you chose life for your little
girl.
Thank you for understanding where I'm
coming from. And i agree with what you
mentioned about post abortion syndrome.
|
bernibaby86
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 186 Location: Pennsylvania
Posted: 06-20-07 10:07am
Quote:
Why should a woman think about how her
decision will affect others around her if
she gets an abortion? If she's a teen
knocked up from prom night and still
living with Mommy and Daddy (and will most
likely be mooching off their wallets to
care for Junior because Mickey D's doesn't
pay a six-figure salary), then I could
understand why she would need to think
about 'people around her' if she planned
on keeping it. But why should other people
be taken into consideration in terms of
abortion? It's the woman's choice alone,
and if someone doesn't like her choice,
why should that make a
difference?
I just wanted to add thatI'm a 20 year old
mother...I'll be turning 21 in July. I may
sound pathetic but I am not financially
stable at all b/c i have not worked a day
in my life. i'm a college student right
now tryin to finish up my last few years
of college so i can begin providing for my
daughter. So, my family gives me money to
buy clothes, formula, diapers, etc. for
her. So I had to think about my
family...cuz they always give me money
when i need it and i dont need it.
|
bernibaby86
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 186 Location: Pennsylvania
Posted: 06-20-07 10:18am
Cambion
wrote:
Quote:
if what grows
inside the woman is half the flesh of the
man he should definetly have a
say.
So you would support a man who coerces his
partner into keeping an unwanted child? On
the same level, would you support a man
who makes his partner abort a child she
wants? Giving men a say in things as
personal as abortion would open up that
door of women being property that was
closed on American soil a long time
ago.
Men should at least have a say in this
situation b/c it is their baby also not
just the woman's. Just b/c men should have
a say doesnt mean that you cant do what
you want. At least listen.
|
Cambion
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 747
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 06-20-07 10:23am
Quote:
if what grows
inside the woman is half the flesh of the
man he should definetly have a
say.
So you would support a man who coerces his
partner into keeping an unwanted child? On
the same level, would you support a man
who makes his partner abort a child she
wants? Giving men a say in things as
personal as abortion would open up that
door of women being property that was
closed on American soil a long time ago.
|
*star*
Supporter
Joined: 12 Dec 2006 Posts: 1804 Location: ,
Thanks: 22
Thanked:24
Posted: 06-20-07 10:24am
I agree with what you are saying about
being concerned with the people around
you. I can understand why your boyfriends
opinion on the situation would affect your
decision. I think that if I was in that
situation, I would have to take in the
opinion of my husband, because the
ultimate decision affects his life as well
as mine. In the end it is the womans
decision, but it makes sense to be
concerned with what your partner wants as
well.
|
sillyakchick
Supporter
Joined: 12 Apr 2007 Posts: 2697
Thanks: 6
Thanked:0
online
Re: Thought of Abortion Posted: 06-20-07 10:49am
bernibaby86
wrote:
Jaggirl
wrote:
You are so right in what you
said '...they should think their decision
over before moving ahead to perform this
choice.'
I know of many women who are having all
kinds of problems because they DID abort
their babies. Many abortion clinics
misinform these girls/women, by such
statements such as, 'the abortion doesn't
hurt'; 'it's not a baby yet...just a blob
of tissue'; etc. The clinics tell them
that if they have the abortion, no one
will ever have to know. But what they
don't tell them is of the post-abortion
syndrome that many women suffer for years.
Many begin a cycle of self-abuse,
mood-swings, anger, low self-esteem, etc.
If a person does the medical research,
they will discover that these tiny babies
ARE babies at just a few weeks old. Some
of these women who have had abortions have
seen their baby as it was being sucked
from it's safety of the mother's uterus.
All I'm saying is...think it over very
long and hard and make sure you've been
given ALL the facts...pro and con.
Personally, I believe you will be blessed
because you chose life for your little
girl.
Thank you for understanding where I'm
coming from. And i agree with what you
mentioned about post abortion
syndrome.
Have you ever heard of post partum
depression? How about post partum
psychosis? Ever heard of infanticide?
How about teenage girls giving birth in
the bathroom so nobody finds out? Don't
you think that people ought to counseled
on these things before they proceed with
an unwanted pregnancy? Why would you
insist that people who wish to abort be
"counseled" on all of these things when
people who don't want to abort are not
counseled about the negative aspects? Why
aren't expectant mothers warned about what
could happen if the placenta decides to
bring her external organs outside of her
body along with it? Why aren't they
warned about the dangers of pre-eclmpsia
and eclampsia? Why don't we show them
photographs of what it will mean to have a
screaming toddler running around the house
destroying everything in his path? Why
don't we show her graphic photos of
perineal tears and explain to her how she
won't be able to jump or sneeze without
crossing her legs, because she might wet
her pants in the grocery store? Why don't
we show her graphic video of women dying
in childbirth and then look at her very
seriously, and say "now, are you
absolutely sure you want to do this?
There aere a lot of complications. your
life will never be the same again. You
could die. The baby might die, be
deformed, etc. Are you absolutely
sure???" Furthermore, the people around
you, as was stated earlier, are not going
to have to give birth to this child and
face all the repurcussions and health
risks related to said pregnancy, labor,
and delivery. I understand taking into
account the wishes of one's partner when
making such a decision, but it is a
woman's body. Nobody should force a woman
to embark on such a task without her
wanting to. Would you force someone to
climb Mount Everest against their will?
Because carrying a child requires the same
human effort as a summit bid on Mount
Everest.
|
bernibaby86
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 186 Location: Pennsylvania
Posted: 06-20-07 11:10am
*star*
wrote:
I agree with what you are
saying about being concerned with the
people around you. I can understand why
your boyfriends opinion on the situation
would affect your decision. I think that
if I was in that situation, I would have
to take in the opinion of my husband,
because the ultimate decision affects his
life as well as mine. In the end it is
the womans decision, but it makes sense to
be concerned with what your partner wants
as well.
Thank you...that was the point i was tryin
to get at.
|
Becky
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jan 2006 Posts: 6225 Location: London, England
Thanks: 0
Thanked:7
Posted: 06-20-07 11:29am
i too contemplated an abortion with my
first pregnancy as i didn't feel ready and
was scared. in the end i decided not too.
after the birth i fell into really bad ppd
and i constantly regretted not having an
abortion.
i blamed everyone around me for not
letting me get an abortion. i sent my
daughter to go and live with my
grandparents at the other side of the
country for two weeks. after a week they
asked me to go and get her. i cried my
eyes out and they thought it was happiness
but it was cause i didn't want her back.
my husband took her to his house (we lived
seperate at the time) while i tried to
'sort myself out' and eventually i just
sort of learned to live with the fact that
i was a mother.
now i love my babies more than anything
and had three children in under three
years.
what i am tyring to say i guess is that
sometimes an abortion is for the best. i
was very depressed during my pregnancy and
i guess this was a sign for things to
come. i don't think anyone should have to
'just live with it' especially if they
were using contraception like me
|
Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 4044 Location: Bliss,
Thanks: 142
Thanked:13
Posted: 06-20-07 11:49am
nightangel73
wrote:
Cambion
wrote:
sorry, but men have no
business telling women what to do with
their bodies.
if what grows inside the woman is half the
flesh of the man he should definetly have
a say.
Does he get "a say" in her diet? Her
living habits? etc...
That's a can of worms I'd rather stay
shut, considering the patriarchal nature
of our society to begin with.
I advocate men's choice in regards to
parenting 100%, but not in regards to
pregnancy decisions.
|
sillyakchick
Supporter
Joined: 12 Apr 2007 Posts: 2697
Thanks: 6
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online
Posted: 06-20-07 11:55am
beckster06
wrote:
i too contemplated an
abortion with my first pregnancy as i
didn't feel ready and was scared. in the
end i decided not too. after the birth i
fell into really bad ppd and i constantly
regretted not having an abortion.
i blamed everyone around me for not
letting me get an abortion. i sent my
daughter to go and live with my
grandparents at the other side of the
country for two weeks. after a week they
asked me to go and get her. i cried my
eyes out and they thought it was happiness
but it was cause i didn't want her back.
my husband took her to his house (we lived
seperate at the time) while i tried to
'sort myself out' and eventually i just
sort of learned to live with the fact that
i was a mother.
now i love my babies more than anything
and had three children in under three
years.
what i am tyring to say i guess is that
sometimes an abortion is for the best. i
was very depressed during my pregnancy and
i guess this was a sign for things to
come. i don't think anyone should have to
'just live with it' especially if they
were using contraception like
me
Thank you so much for sharing that! I
think all too often people expect mothers
to be glowing with love and adoration for
their newborn, and sometimes it just isn't
the way things really are. I am so glad
you were able to make it out of that scary
mess. We should talk some time
