Teen Pregnancy Forum - Boyfriends...


Boyfriends...

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KariM18

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 13 Jan 2004
Posts: 1436
Location: Grand Blanc, Michigan

Boyfriends... Posted: 03-06-04 21:26pm


Im having boyfriend drama.. Im really upset actually. .And confused. Ive been with jason for 2 1/2 months now (hes not the babys father) hes nice to me normally and seemed real supportive in the beginning. .But lately. .We will argue and he says really rude insensitive things like he will say '' u know, not many other guys are gonna want a pregnant girl''. . And I mean that may be true. But still .. .My dad says that it sounds like hes trying to act like hes doin me some favor by bein with me...Also when we fight he will compare (or even purposely call me) his ex girlfriend jenny! He knows it reeeally angers me off. .And lastly when we talk about the baby. .He is starting to say things that discourage me.. He will tell me that no matter how hard I try, it wont be enough ,that the baby needs its dad (which I am not thinking the dad will be around) and. .When I come over for example. .Most boyfriend would seem happy to see their girlfriend after not seein em for a few days.. But like last time, I came in his room and he was readin a magazine and kept reading for like 10 min b4 he talked to me when I first got there..But sometiems I almost feel like ijust should settle.. . Because I guess in my own mind I just think that later I wont have time to find a boyfriend because I wil have a baby. .And also because theres not many other guys I find that I like that dont drink, go to bars, do drugs, party etc . . . I know that sounds stupid tho. He does have his nice moments dont get me wrong but when I bring this stuff up he blames it on me.

honeycoco

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy

Joined: 11 Nov 2003
Posts: 376
Location: georgia

Posted: 03-06-04 22:09pm


You shouldnt have to settle for anyone. You will be able to find a good man. I know alot of men who date woman who already have children. So please dont feel like you have to settle. I bet if you told him it was over today. He would be calling and begging for you back. chrystal

little_woman

Active User, Really EHEALTHy

Joined: 04 Mar 2004
Posts: 765

Posted: 03-06-04 22:25pm


Hon, dont settle for someone who treats you like !@#. And there are many men who do not mind a pregnant girl so hang on meg p.S - god invented men cause vibrators dont mow the lawn

JillMarie

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 24 Dec 2003
Posts: 3022
Location: Iowa

Posted: 03-06-04 23:07pm


Okay girl-look at me! I have 3 kids with 2 different guys and one on the way with my boyfriend. I feel terrible having kids with different guys and having so many kids in the first place but you can definitly find a guy. Im not the type to be without a boyfriend but I wish I would have for atleast awhile in my life. Dont settle if he is already making you feel bad. It will only get worst!

lee25

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 30 Dec 2003
Posts: 1018
Location: new york

Posted: 03-06-04 23:11pm


The girls are rightyou shouldn't have to settle. I don't want to upset you, but maybe he's pushing you away on purpose. Maybe he wants you to break up with him because he doesn't want to hurt you. By the way did you ever stop to think that he got with you because of the fact that you were already pregnant and he didn't have to worry about getting you pregnant himself, and now that you are getting bigger he changed his mind and doesn't want to deal with someone elses kid. I'm not trying to to hurt you, or worry you, or offend you. It's just that I wouldn't want you to get too involved with him and it not be worth it. Guys can be suckers you know. I know, I grew up with alot of them never really had any female friends. Why don't you just ask him what he wants, tell him that if he doesn't want to be with you any more to stop playing games with you. As for worrying about finding another boyfriend, forget give yourself time, prepare yourself mentally for that gorgeous little boy your going to have. As for guys, that will come later. Remember baby first, boys later. Your 18 there will be plenty of men in your life. The girls are right you know, you will find a guy that will love you and your child as his own. I don't want to sound like i'm preaching, but having a few years on you I know by now how a mans mind works. Plus with your pregnancy you don't need to be getting stressed over a guy you've been with for 2 1/2 months. Like I said before I hope I didn't offend you, just don't want to see you get hurt in the long run. Your dad is right he's not doing you any favors, you have your family that loves you and will love grant. That's all the baby needs. Remember a sperm donor doesn't make a dad. The one who will be their for grant and take resposibility is the father. Dna doen't matter when it comes to support and love. Brenda

KariM18

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 13 Jan 2004
Posts: 1436
Location: Grand Blanc, Michigan

Posted: 03-07-04 09:57am


Alrgith everyone so this is what happened. We got in another fight and I broke up with him. 5 min later he called me back saying hes so sorry and he doesnt want to be with out me etc etc. .Well I didnt change my mind and I said that I needed time to think but for the mean time we are on a break. .Then I got another call at 2:30 am saying he couldnt sleep because he misses me and cant stand knowing that were not together. I dont know what to think right now. I think I made a rash decisision but I do want to think everything over too. So lee, I dont think thats right about him trying to push me away cuz hes been crying and callin me back to come back to him, and he really isnt the type to just want to be with me cuz he cant get me pregnant, actually he was willing to wait a long ass time to have sex,he likes to wait a long time himself and we didnt have sex till recently, and he doesnt even think im big yet. But im not offended at all. I know I shouldnt settle and I will try to remember that but I also dont wanna lose a good guy over petty fights so I need to think. Thanks alot girls*

mommabear16

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 16 Jan 2004
Posts: 1222
Location: illinois

Posted: 03-07-04 11:11am


Mmm the old....'i cant live without you' seen. Hmmmmm..Iv'e heard that before. But if you feel that you should be with him, then thats what you should do! Go with your heart .

KariM18

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 13 Jan 2004
Posts: 1436
Location: Grand Blanc, Michigan

Posted: 03-07-04 11:27am


Well I know its a common line.. Other guys have done it too like when I was in highschool . .But then he wrote me a 3 page email. . . Nicest stuff ive ever read. Im not back with him yet. I still need time to think.. But I at least know he cares. He just asked me if I would come over and let him make dinner for me. . But I dont know if I want to . . I mean I dont want him doin somethin like that to suck up.

little_woman

Active User, Really EHEALTHy

Joined: 04 Mar 2004
Posts: 765

Posted: 03-07-04 14:54pm


Stand your ground sweetie!! I am on a break right now too and its the hardest thing but it is a good thing. Time to reflect and think I have found out is a very valuble thing, step back and see what you want. Its a hurting thing but it does well in the end. Its up to whether you want to talk to him or not its your choice since you call the shots. Having small conversations daily is ok but no physical stuff, kissing , sex, nuzzling, nothing. Hang in there ok? And no matter how much he cries give it time

PregnaJordan

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 18 Oct 2003
Posts: 2908

Posted: 03-07-04 15:08pm


Omg, when I moved out of chris's he called everyday for a while saing he was going to kill himself and he realizes how much he loves me nw that im not there, and now look what happened! He got married and is in jail now! Tehehe...He didnt give a medical question!!! Girl, the seperation will be hard(i admit)for about a month or so, but I got over that caca now! Boys will b boys! Dont settle for anyone..You b the one in control!...If u think the email was the sweetest thing...La ti da! He knows how to play you! And hes doing a good job! Girl, dont fall for it..If I have to im going to go dig out letters from chris and show u that they all know the same caca and they all say the same caca and they will never change!!! Jordan and jaydyn

pInKpAnThEr

Active User, Really EHEALTHy

Joined: 06 Jan 2004
Posts: 626
Location: Indiana

Posted: 03-07-04 15:36pm


I need to take control of myself too. Ugh, its so dang hard.. I love him but he needs to grow the heck up for me! And soon!! Love mol

MegEve

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy

Joined: 13 Nov 2003
Posts: 353
Location: Alabama

Posted: 03-07-04 16:33pm


You need to go out with some girl friends. That always helped me when I had guy troubles. Your friends will support you even if he doesn't. And we are all here for you!! Megan

BbyBlu0602

Active User, Really EHEALTHy

Joined: 10 Feb 2004
Posts: 822
Location: Virginia

Posted: 03-07-04 22:42pm


My ex-boyfriend, ethan's dad, was really immature. I loved him, but I just got sick of all the immature crap. He would make promises he never kept, he would hardly ever call, he left me alone when I was in labor, and he did a lot of those things that all you other ladies are talking about your boyfriends doing. I was really attached to him too. We've known each other and been together for 3 years total. Well, we were. As much as it hurts, sometimes it's the right thing to just let them go. You just need to ask yourself if you really deserve how you're being treated and if you think you could be happier if you didn't have to deal with all the stupid crap you get from him. Don't listen to what anyone says about guys not wanting a pregnant girl or a girl who has a kid...That's crap too. There are a lot of mature, responsible guys out there who love kids and don't judge by that sort of thing. As sweet as all of you seem, you do deserve better and there is someone out there who will make all your dreams come true. You just have to be patient and wait for them to come into your life. If it gets to a point where you're watching tv and see a happy couple together and it makes you cry or makes you jealous...I'd say it's time to move and wait for mister right instead of staying with mister wrong. Love, crystal

insurancegirl

Especially EHEALTHy

Joined: 25 Sep 2003
Posts: 5295

Posted: 03-09-04 02:05am


Last edited by insurancegirl on 10-11-04 08:28am; edited 1 time in total

nikki_caro

Extremely EHEALTHy

Joined: 22 Aug 2003
Posts: 4930
Location: Right here at work!

Posted: 03-09-04 02:18am


Never settle for less than you deserve. And this guy does not deserve you at all, he treats you like crap and you dont need that. Dont ever let him tell you that no one wants a pregnant girl!! The truth is, alot of men do! My sis had like 4 guys wanting to be the dad!!!! And the baby is 1 and she still gets guys that want her! They know she has a kid and they dont care, its not about you having a baby, they either like you or they dont. And its no reason to treat you like that. Just dump him and let him see what hes gonna miss. You can do it by yourself, dont concentrate on a guy right now, just think about the baby and yourself and then later on more guys will come and I dont think they will treat you like that at all.

Uniquecc

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy

Joined: 02 Jan 2004
Posts: 85
Location: Santa Barbara, CA

Posted: 03-09-04 04:56am


Right now your main concern should be about your baby. Don't stress your self out, cause you'll stress out your baby. Obviously their's something up with your man. I say forget him. Even if you do really love/care for him, don't show it. Then he'll know how much he can hurt you. It's all about being strong. I know it's hard, but it's just something you got to do. I was so stressed throughout my last pregnancy that during delivery ryan (father) couldn't cut issac's cord do to stress and issac pooping inside me (i know that sounds sick, but it's true) so they had to pull him out real fast and suck all the stuff out before he took his first breath. I was scared. Believe me it's something you don't want to experience. Good luck.