Joined: 21 Apr 2007 Posts: 111 Location: Australia
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Sad, Kinda Long Posted: 07-09-07 00:14am
i dont exactly know how to explain whats
going on but ill try my hardest. im not
exactly shureif this si the right forum
either but yer!! i have self diognosed
myself with depression but i dont want to
go to the doctors about it, like i do but
i dont i cant explain it. spometimes i
cry for no reason at all, other times its
for a reason but i just cant stop crying,
i dont think i love my bf any more. i do
love him in a friend way and in a caring
way but not ina boyfriend way, like inlove
kinda thing. last night he wanted to have
sex, but i didnt but i lost interest in
sex ages ago and heis an aries so he never
will lol, but i thought u no i have been
really mean to him lately because im
always down or angry or irritated, so i
thought ill just do it for me ( trust me
if i realli didnt want to at all i would
have firmly tlold him no, im not like
that)
so he started kising me and stuff and i
felt really weird and i just got all
confused and got upset and i was trying
not to cry while he was kissing me and
just rubbing me kinda. i was getting
really frustrated like i really didnt want
to be there, we had sex and because i was
holding the tears in, sex hurt because i
wasnt relaxed even though i was trying to
be as much as possible. i said to him it
hurt and he asked if we could go for afew
more minutes (being an aries and a guy and
all lol) so i said yes, but it started
stinging n i said no more and so he got
off (sorry bout the graphics) and kinda
put his bixers on n i thought he would
have finished off but he didnt so it must
have upset him caz we hadnt been going for
that long.
me still about to burst out in tears went
to the bathroom and couldnt contain myself
and started crying, i realli couldnt help
it.
It was like i was being raped, forsed into
something i didnt want to do, and i didnt
know what to think, it was degrading ( i
really am sorry if i offended anyone, pm
me if i upset you) i cant say it was like
rape because i have never been in an awful
situation like that but yer. i pulled
myself together and layed in bed, andhe
spooned me, and i started tearing again.
i feel so badly for him, im such a health
forum to him, and i know im not giving him
everything of me i can, and for that
reason he isnt giving me the samein
return, but that is not his fault!!
i am really frustrated as tot he way
feel!!! can someone help me understand.
i dont do anything all day, i am
lethargic, i am not lazy, i have lost all
interest in like everything, i cant wait
until the weekdays so i can sit at home by
myself, alone, im not a loner thats just
the way i like it. its a hot day and i
cant even bring myself to go to the beach
downt he road because i cant find the
enegry. i get puffed out going up and
down the staires to the top floor (my
room) i stay awake until late and sleep in
till late, even then i get tired easy from
doing nothing. i dont feel asthough there
is a phisical problem with me and being
lethargic, but i cant bring myself to got
o the doctors, i know its easy to just
tell me to go, but its not easy for me, i
dont know why, its a strage thing!!!! i
have no friends, i do but tey live a long
way away and i think thats part of
depression, i think everything is, im no
the kind of person to talk about how i
feel, and i wish i was, my bf isnt the
kind of guy i cant talk to this caca
about. i just want an outsiders
opinion!!! plz help, im not shure if i
would be able to see a councilor either.
how is depression diagnosed? do i have to
have a blood test?
thanks for reading
-ness-
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12988
Thanks: 2
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Posted: 07-09-07 00:56am
Depression is diagnosed via the symptoms
and behaviors the patient exhibits; it's
not a disease that can be 'tested' for
persay.
You really need to go to a doctor; they
can help you!! You need help. You need
someone to help you figure out why you are
having these feelings of sadness, what to
do about it, and get you into some kind of
program or regiment to make you better.
I think you need to fess up to your
boyfriend as well; he as a right to know
that it's not his fault. You say you can't
talk to him about these kinds of things...
but this is a very important issue that is
controlling you right now!
I'm not even going to touch on the zodiac
crap and "he's just a guy", because that's
baloney. Being born in a certain month
does not make you behave in a certain
way.
You certainly sound like you have medical
depression, and it needs to be diagnosed
so you can start getting better.
Otherwise, it will just keep runing your
life.
|
*Vanessa*
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Apr 2007 Posts: 111 Location: Australia
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Thanked:0
Posted: 07-09-07 01:31am
Eiri
wrote:
Depression is diagnosed via
the symptoms and behaviors the patient
exhibits; it's not a disease that can be
'tested' for persay.
You really need to go to a doctor; they
can help you!! You need help. You need
someone to help you figure out why you are
having these feelings of sadness, what to
do about it, and get you into some kind of
program or regiment to make you better.
I think you need to fess up to your
boyfriend as well; he as a right to know
that it's not his fault. You say you can't
talk to him about these kinds of things...
but this is a very important issue that is
controlling you right now!
I'm not even going to touch on the zodiac
crap and "he's just a guy", because that's
baloney. Being born in a certain month
does not make you behave in a certain
way.
You certainly sound like you have medical
depression, and it needs to be diagnosed
so you can start getting better.
Otherwise, it will just keep runing your
life.
i will try to talk to him, sorry about the
zodiac guy thing!! i truely didnt mean to
offend and thanks for telling me lol!!
i want to try talk to huim about it, how
do i go about it? what do i say? maybe i
should just talk to a proffesional.
thank you
|
Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12988
Thanks: 2
Thanked:0
Posted: 07-09-07 11:54am
The only reason I think you should tell
him a little about what you're going
through is so that he can understand that
it's not his fault. Even if all you can
manage is "Honey, I'm depressed, that's
why I've been acting so weird lately. I'm
going to get some help for it." I think
that will be enough to be fair to him.
I think you also do need to see a
professional and get about working with
them to find out why you are depressed.
Depression is a complicated issue. Some
people have a chemical imbalance and need
medication. Other people have deep-rooted
issues that they need to work out through
therapy. Some people need both. You won't
know until you go talk to a psychologist
or a doctor.
|
Rosie H
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jun 2007 Posts: 926 Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
online
I Know How You Feel... Posted: 07-11-07 11:14am
Hello there,
I have gone through so many issues with
depression and sexual emotional problems
with my boyfriend. I would freak out
sometimes during sex because I would get
flashbacks. My boyfriend had no idea why
these things were happenin and he felt he
was hurting me or being perverted towards
me. It created a lot of problems for him
and I.
I think for me to finally ask for help I
had to feel so bad almost suicidal. The
pain just got to be so much I called my
insurance company and set up an appt. I
found a great therapist and we worked
through these things together. I have
overcome a lot of my fears when it comes
to intmacy and sex acts. I am even closer
to my hubby than ever before.
The biggest thing was communication
between my boyfriend and I. I had to tell
him how I felt, no matter how ashamed I
felt.
I dont know I guess Im trying to say is I
know what you are going through and please
get help. Even from a close family member
or a priest. There are people out there
that can and want to help you. I could
not do it alone, I tryed for years.
I am not as depressed as I used to be,
but there are still times when I feel
awful, thats when I talk to someone.
It will be hard but each time you open up
a little it gets easier. I wish you luck.
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