Question: If Gad Is Left Untreated What Can It Lead to ... Posted: 03-09-04 06:25am
My wife was diagnosised with gad about 5
years ago and has tried various
medications and feels that the side
effects from the medications are worse
than living with the anxiety. My question
is does gad lead to depression and
possible bi-polar disorder. At the
moment she is cruising along at a good
level, but about 3 months back she scared
me and I really thought she was slipping
into a depressed state.
My marriage is basicially on the line, and
though I have vowed to do whatever it
takes to make it work, she has no emotion
what so ever and wants to remain in the
marriage for the kids and just live
together? I can't see any future in this
and am trying to find out if hear mental
state is on the level. A loveless
marriage is the most devasting thing I
have ever had to encounter in my life and
will only continue if I can assume that
her mental state is in question an a
therapist maybe able to help the
situation.We tried marriage counseling but
she did not wish to participate in the
activities so we stopped going.
In a nut shell she has become a person I
no longer know and I am trying to find the
woman I married in there somewhere.
Thanks for letting me vent.
Francisco.
|
qt3
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 264
Re: Question: If Gad Is Left Untreated What Can It Lead to . Posted: 03-10-04 09:05am
francisco
wrote:
my wife was diagnosised with
gad about 5 years ago and has tried
various medications and feels that the
side effects from the medications are
worse than living with the anxiety. My
question is does gad lead to depression
and possible bi-polar disorder. At the
moment she is cruising along at a good
level, but about 3 months back she scared
me and I really thought she was slipping
into a depressed state.
My marriage is basicially on the line, and
though I have vowed to do whatever it
takes to make it work, she has no emotion
what so ever and wants to remain in the
marriage for the kids and just live
together? I can't see any future in this
and am trying to find out if hear mental
state is on the level. A loveless
marriage is the most devasting thing I
have ever had to encounter in my life and
will only continue if I can assume that
her mental state is in question an a
therapist maybe able to help the
situation.We tried marriage counseling but
she did not wish to participate in the
activities so we stopped going.
In a nut shell she has become a person I
no longer know and I am trying to find the
woman I married in there somewhere.
Thanks for letting me vent.
Francisco.
hi francisco-
i have good news and bad news. The good
news is you either are bi-polar or you are
not so it is unlikely if she has not been
diagnosed as bi-polar that she will become
bi-polar. The bad news is that it is
quite common for gad to develop into other
anxieties like panic disorder and
depression.
But the re is more good news.... The
answer for me was cognitive behavioral
therapy (cbt). I was on meds for many
years before I found cbt and it cured me
and got me off meds in a remarkably short
period of time. Cbt is not like other
talk therapy. A good cbt therapist does
not care much about your past or why you
think you feel the way you do etc. A good
cbt therapist knows they cannot change
what's already happened to you but they
can help you change how you deal with what
happens in your life from here on out.
It's all about using the tools to learn to
think more clearly and accurately about
things and once you do your anxiety, panic
and depression will miraculously begin to
lift before your eyes. My favorite
starter book on cbt is "been there, done
that? Do this! By sam obitz
(www.Tao3.Com) based on what I have seen
with the people I know who used cbt the
more dedicated you are to the tools the
faster and deeper the recovery regardless
of how bad their anxiety was when they got
started. It was inspiring to see the
people that dove in head first and how
fast they started seeing results to those
of us like me that were more skeptical and
less dedicated to using the tools in the
beginning. Like anything in life the more
you put in the more you get out of cbt.
That's why I think group settings can be
especially effective with cbt because you
can see the people that are working the
hardest to get well making the most
progress and it becomes infectious.
I hope this is helpful as cbt is not easy
but well worth the effort involved and can
turn your wife's life around if she uses
the tools.
Take care!
Q
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purple333
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Dec 2003 Posts: 1420 Location: Sydney
Posted: 03-11-04 23:47pm
The problem here may be getting your wife
to do anything at all, if she's "happy"
with things as they are why would she
change or try anything else?? You can
guide/suggest but only she can act!!
I get the feeling that you still love your
wife (otherwise you wouldn't stick around
& you wouldn't care etc). Are there
any support groups for family members of
people with mental health issues near you?
This could help you find out what's
available in your area & what others
have found useful that you might try in
order to get your wife to act!!
How old are your kids, could they be
co-opted to help you help your wife??
Would your wife take some "vitamins"?
There are some natural medications like
5htp (tryptophan), sam-e, vitamin b's,
dhea, that can hep or even overcome many
mental health issues (every one is
different) these shouldn't interfere with
any meds your wife is on & she might
be willing to take them on the basis of
general well-being/general good health (i
know it's not totally honest but sometimes
backdoors are necessary).
Many meds lower or totally eliminate your
sex drive whereas the natural ones do not
do this especially dhea (it can actually
increase sex drive, emotions etc).
Could you talk to your wife's dr about
where you are at & whether he/she
feels that it would be detrimental to your
wife to talk to her about your feelings
& the fact that you feel your marriage
to be on the line?? If your wife really
knew this it might give her enough of a
push to do something.
Is there anything you & she or all of
you as a family enjoy doing together? Is
she interested in anything? Getting her
doing things that are positive might also
help, giving her positive feedback when
she shows positive emotion or interest in
things could help too. Most of us respond
to positive input (even if it takes time
before others see that it's worked) - this
is an area that the kids (if old enough)
could really help with, the maternal
instinct can be pretty strong.
Good luck
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Haley
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Feb 2004 Posts: 122
Posted: 03-12-04 16:06pm
Hi francisco, I like purple's advise about
positive input and doing things together
as a family. I'm in a cbt group right now
and it is really helping so if you can get
her involved in one that would be good
too. My cbt group is free of charge other
than two books I had to buy. The obitz
book mentioned in qt3's post above and
mastery of your anxiety and panic-third
edition by michelle craske and david
barlow as I suffer from panic disorder as
well.
